The Pythagorean theorem sure does get old after a while. We need some new exciting theorem like, "Fucking stupid triangles won't get you laid. Only money does that. Grab them by the pussy."

Imagine if Luke Skywalker
ever mistook his light saber
for his Fleshlight.

Green anal mucus.
Glowing radioactive.
Recharge your cell phone.

Only through me can
you acheive a power be-
yond any Jedi!

Lets gang bang this girl.
Never mind that she's purple.
And has fourteen legs.

Ash you need some help.
Your Trump Derangement Syndrome
Can be cured (through Trump)

trump's hair has gone white
a merkin supremacist
for a major twat

Somewhere in the world
Someone is taking a dump
That looks just like tRump

Somewhere in the world
someone who looks just like you
is taking a dump

happy birthday site
24 years old today
e-geriatric

Fart out your penis!
You say it's impossible,
but I did it once!

A new drinking game.
When covid numbers go up
you must take a shot.

Check your country's stats
each and every minute.
Worldmeter dot com.

https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/

Oh shit. I have to have a shot now.

And if the active cases go down that means you have to rush into the bathroom and vomit.

Enjoy!

No, I was not born.
I was found under a rock.
So my "mom" tells me.

Drunken particles.
Accelerated neutrons.
Reactor meltdown.

It's Donald Trumps fault.
But at least it's not his fart.
That would be much worse.

Sigh, oh ye willows.
Hang your boughs in grief and shame:
Darth's mom has birthed him.

So fun we got funt.
You were so bent you got bunt;
So shunned we were shunt.

Noun. funt. A unit of weight: 1 funt = 1 qadaq = 32 lot = 96 mısqal = 409.5 g = 1 pound (archaic)

A funt is a pound!
Shit, I'd like to pound her funt!
That's a funky cunt.

Those teenage hookers
Are very good at crochet.
They can make rugs too.

Haiku layer cake
Seventeen hot syllables
Happy Birthday, Darth

Take your vitamins.
Don't want to have a limp dick,
you silly old man.

Guess how old I am.
Phyically not mentally.
Booger fart poopoo!

Do you like funt cake?
Who put this funt in my cart?
Funt should be a word.

How did you know that?!
But, and I've told you before,
I've stopped fucking pigs!

Just teenage hookers.
Make sure they're not ladyboys.
Those silly Asians.

Did you remember
On this day in November?
Figpucker's Birthday

No conspiracy
Just lack of transparency
(Your emergency)

Breaking wind (and hearts)
Steamy kisses (fragrant farts)
Cupid's arrows (darts)

China lectures us ?
UN is irrelevant !
One World: go to hell.

Elections have rules.
Science is real. No fake votes.
You can kiss my Ash.

A place for pigeons
Make him into a statue
If the coup don't fly

ima gonna stay
you can't make me go away
with illegal votes

Meow, Starkitten here
I like to call it catnip
It makes me purr. Purr ....

Donald Trump's a chump.
He will not concede his seed
in this time of need.

Watching the death count.
It's gotten to be boring.
Can I burn one, please?

I mean the bodies.
Or maybe a joint also.
Burn one then burn one.

To quote Cypress Hill:
I want to get hiiiigh, so high.
Insane in the brain.

Honeymoon Night
Someone call the coroner
The little guy's dead

All these dead bodies.
I can't have sex with them and...
they're inedible!

Covid's not so fun.
Unless it kills enemies.
Then I'll have a laugh.

The President, erect
He stands behind the lectern
Watch it levitate

Cannibalism
It gets so quiet in here
when you mention it

Longpig Turducken
Three corpses shoved together
A true feast of friends

Osturduckenbat.
Like turducken but ostrich
outside, bat inside.

Please God, we need war.
Pandemic redneck shootings.
MAGA mass murders.

Kill the parasites!
Send them to California.'
Or their own countries.

Freaks there, humans here.
Heil motherfucking Trump.
Orange retribution!

Happy Thanksgiving
Lame duck a l'orange this year
Pardon the turkeys

It looks just like Trump.
Cheeto with cotton candy.
Tastes just like him too.

Here, hold THIS hotdog.
Those aren't burn marks -- those are scabs.
Yes, it's mayonaise filled.

4 MORE QUEERS!
4 MORE QUEERS!
4 MORE QUEERS!

The electric chair
Take a load off. Sit down.
Here, hold this hotdog

What was he wearing
under his KKK robes?
A Star Wars costume?!

Are you kidding me?!
Jar Jar motherfucking Binks?!
What the hell -- He's black!

It ain't over yet!
Donald Trump will kick your ass!
Bleeding heart poets!

Ten thousand cheap drones.
Attach dynamite to them.
Take out Democrats.

Those Godless heathens
will burn in the fiery pits.
We'll knock back some beers.

I cast fire spell.
Black neighbors across the street
take 10 damage points.

(8*10^21 atoms)/(6.022*10^23 atom/mol)*(190.23 g/mol)

Come on you Trumpers!
Get out your guns and grenades.
Make America

White... err, I mean Great Again.

I fucked her in an apple orchard
and came in cider.

Inside Darth inside
Darth inside Darth inside Darth
Inside Darth incide