Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 19 Days and 76191 Haiku later...

That drunk waiter: dead.
Fresh on the table: his head.
Head waiter: "They're fed !"
Haiku # 76191, November 30, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Waitress of Leave a Big Tip and Exit Quickly
That dinner party
At the head of the table
Our old friend, Grimace
Haiku # 76189, November 30, 2022 4:39 am ET
by Drunken Waiter of The Party
We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.
Haiku # 76188, November 29, 2022 11:49 pm ET
by Cryptography of Sexography
Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's
Haiku # 76187, November 29, 2022 7:26 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.
Haiku # 76186, November 28, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Jean-Luc Epstein
Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills
Haiku # 76185, November 28, 2022 1:15 pm ET
by Vhs of Happy holidays to you
the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately
Haiku # 76184, November 28, 2022 6:10 am ET
by ash of special relativity
Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.
Haiku # 76183, November 27, 2022 4:10 pm ET
by Counting Down to the Day of Haiku-mass
Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'
Haiku # 76181, November 25, 2022 10:24 am ET
by Janis of Sloosha's Crossin'
brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.
Haiku # 76172, November 19, 2022 1:40 pm ET
by Naïve Internaut of Juggernaut
Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar
Haiku # 76171, November 19, 2022 3:41 am ET
by Bob Vila of This Stinky Old House
Why was Canaan cursed?
Will the REAL Jews please stand up ?
Japeth are Shemites?
Haiku # 76168, November 15, 2022 6:37 pm ET
by Bible School of Reading Genesis on Crack
You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!
Haiku # 76165, November 13, 2022 10:09 pm ET
by Scatological Analyses of Eschatology
Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!
Haiku # 76164, November 11, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Ann I. Helped of Shake And Bake
You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...
Haiku # 76163, November 11, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Haiku Solidarity of Klownworld
totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus
Haiku # 76162, November 11, 2022 7:51 pm ET
by ash of antipyretic sensibility
Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?
Haiku # 76161, November 11, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Salute of Backend
antipodean
inverted defecation
is moving on up
Haiku # 76160, November 11, 2022 2:06 am ET
by ash of shit , yeah!
How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.
Haiku # 76159, November 10, 2022 9:53 pm ET
by Rusty McPherson of Tokugawa Bridge in Moonlight
How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds
Haiku # 76157, November 9, 2022 9:58 am ET
by 300000 volunteers can't be wrong
Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.
Haiku # 76156, November 8, 2022 3:51 pm ET
by Glenndert's Mother of Danzig New Jersey (haikuized 4 U)
Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely
Haiku # 76155, November 8, 2022 8:24 am ET
by Glenndrert of Germany
Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.
Haiku # 76154, November 8, 2022 8:22 am ET
by Candidato of Sindicato
Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid
Haiku # 76151, November 6, 2022 4:08 pm ET
by Wuhan of CCP Bio-weapons Lunchbox
Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.
Haiku # 76150, November 6, 2022 4:05 pm ET
by World Health Organism of Lies
If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?
Haiku # 76146, November 5, 2022 11:36 am ET
by Clog of Vegemite
Hooz fartz u sniffin?
Lord Fartsniffer sniffs his own.
They all smell like cheese.
Haiku # 76145, November 5, 2022 11:31 am ET
by The Wonder of Microbes
First, Cassowary.
Next, Lord Fartsniffer's mother.
Then we come for YOU.
Haiku # 76144, November 5, 2022 7:54 am ET
by Haiku Death Squad of Poetic Intimidation
I am RIGHT HERE. Now.
That is called "being present".
Where the fuck are you?
Haiku # 76141, November 4, 2022 5:51 pm ET
by Omnipresence of Memory
Where are you?
Haiku # 76140, November 4, 2022 2:54 am ET
by Luca McDonell of a point or extent in space
The world won't improve...
Always intensifying,
It gets worse and worse.
Haiku # 76139, November 3, 2022 10:08 pm ET
by Entropy of Empathy
You talking to me?
Have you noticed my pig jowls?
Never mind my hair.
Haiku # 76138, November 2, 2022 9:16 am ET
by Elon(gpig) Musk of Great Clips
free speech costs a lot
did elon save on his hair ?
neither's a bargain
Haiku # 76137, November 2, 2022 4:37 am ET
by ash of pieces at any price
Stan has lost all shame
He reads his haikus on air
He should stick to jazz
Haiku # 76135, October 30, 2022 7:17 pm ET
by Pabs of Canada
since their zeitgeist dream
political bedfellows
all woke together
Haiku # 76133, October 29, 2022 10:03 pm ET
by ash of inadequate sedation
clouds finally cede
to psychedelic azure
of a sydney spring
Haiku # 76132, October 29, 2022 4:16 am ET
by ash of things are looking up
Your mind is RIGHT THERE:
Inside a Blue Whale's butthole.
Stay right where you are.
Haiku # 76131, October 28, 2022 5:35 pm ET
by Leviathan of the Seven Seas
A blue whale's fart bubble is large enough to hold a horse.
Haiku # 76130, October 27, 2022 6:02 am ET
by Stable of Flatulence
Darth has a tantrum.
He screams and belches haiku.
Darth, honey, calm down.
Haiku # 76129, October 26, 2022 6:36 am ET
by Triggered Fig of Figured Trig
Soup and potatoes
I throw them at your haikus
But you will write more
Haiku # 76128, October 25, 2022 3:53 pm ET
by Waster of Food
perspiration (sweat)
all aboard a train of slobs
(Dirty underwear)

farts in the firebox
despite a head of cabbage
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76127, October 25, 2022 12:15 pm ET
by Charred remains of Poopstains
perseveration
all aboard a train of thought
but going nowhere

coke in the firebox
despite a full head of steam
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76126, October 25, 2022 8:18 am ET
by ash of do the locomotion
First there comes the flesh.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Longpig casserole
Haiku # 76125, October 25, 2022 5:34 am ET
by You were of What I just ate
First there comes the flush.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Poetry sewer
Haiku # 76124, October 25, 2022 5:32 am ET
by Stench of Poetry reading ( on the toilet)
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