Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 248 Days and 77180 Haiku later...

Please God, we need war.
Pandemic redneck shootings.
MAGA mass murders.

Kill the parasites!
Send them to California.'
Or their own countries.

Freaks there, humans here.
Heil motherfucking Trump.
Orange retribution!
Haiku # 68713, November 11, 2020 2:51 am ET
by Red bullet proof baseball cap. of Kevlar. 3 full auto rifles.
Happy Thanksgiving
Lame duck a l'orange this year
Pardon the turkeys
Haiku # 68712, November 11, 2020 2:46 am ET
by Carcass Tosser of White House Lawn
It looks just like Trump.
Cheeto with cotton candy.
Tastes just like him too.
Haiku # 68711, November 11, 2020 2:41 am ET
by Homeless child of New York City
Here, hold THIS hotdog.
Those aren't burn marks -- those are scabs.
Yes, it's mayonaise filled.
Haiku # 68710, November 11, 2020 2:39 am ET
by Oops! Did it squirt your eye?
Haiku # 68709, November 11, 2020 2:36 am ET
by American Tourist of Pattaya Thailand
The electric chair
Take a load off. Sit down.
Here, hold this hotdog
Haiku # 68708, November 11, 2020 2:03 am ET
by Frank Burns of Weiner Roast
What was he wearing
under his KKK robes?
A Star Wars costume?!

Are you kidding me?!
Jar Jar motherfucking Binks?!
What the hell -- He's black!
Haiku # 68707, November 10, 2020 10:31 pm ET
by Messa got big-ol' boner! of (Meesa sometimes pretend.)
It ain't over yet!
Donald Trump will kick your ass!
Bleeding heart poets!
Haiku # 68706, November 10, 2020 10:26 pm ET
by Stop the Squeal of Proud Ladyboys
Ten thousand cheap drones.
Attach dynamite to them.
Take out Democrats.

Those Godless heathens
will burn in the fiery pits.
We'll knock back some beers.
Haiku # 68705, November 10, 2020 5:47 pm ET
by Proud Boys! of White Flour! White Flour! White Flour!
I cast fire spell.
Black neighbors across the street
take 10 damage points.
Haiku # 68704, November 10, 2020 5:25 pm ET
by Grand Wizard rolling dice. of Stealing their fried chicken tho!
(8*10^21 atoms)/(6.022*10^23 atom/mol)*(190.23 g/mol)
Haiku # 68703, November 10, 2020 5:19 pm ET
by 2.53 g of Ozzy Osbournium
Come on you Trumpers!
Get out your guns and grenades.
Make America

White... err, I mean Great Again.
Haiku # 68702, November 10, 2020 5:15 pm ET
by Grand Wizard of Dungeons & Dragons
I fucked her in an apple orchard
and came in cider.
Haiku # 68701, November 10, 2020 5:04 pm ET
by Bo, yo!
Inside Darth inside
Darth inside Darth inside Darth
Inside Darth incide
Haiku # 68700, November 10, 2020 3:00 pm ET
by Rushing Doll of Shelf
Trump just beginning
Making global Left livid
Election clean-up!
Haiku # 68699, November 10, 2020 1:36 pm ET
by Dishonest Dems of Too Far Too Fast
Turduckens are gross.
Fat white trash flesh fantasy.
Fowl insertion feast.
Haiku # 68698, November 10, 2020 12:49 pm ET
by Keep it basic. of Stuff it with stuffing, not a bird inside a bird inside a bird... They ain't Russian dolls!
It all goes down here.
Bad Haiku is the battle
for transparency.
Haiku # 68697, November 10, 2020 7:49 am ET
by Not "Trans Parents" see?
it's white as they come
regardless of skin colour
we're all sperm brothers
Haiku # 68696, November 10, 2020 7:16 am ET
by ash
Garden of long dinks
Here I go gathering nuts
in May. Tra La La.
Haiku # 68695, November 10, 2020 5:37 am ET
by Dink puller of Dink Garden
Stop changing it to garden
Haiku # 68694, November 10, 2020 5:35 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Gordon Ramsay's dink
Marinated for 2 days
In Ina Garden's cunt
Haiku # 68693, November 10, 2020 5:34 am ET
by Foodie of Watching TV in kitchen
Like, I'm not gay, but
I'd eat magic dink mushrooms.
And go surf with sharks.
Haiku # 68692, November 9, 2020 6:33 pm ET
by Shark stuffed w/ Long Pig stuffed with Mushrooms! of Way better than "turducken".
Men die. Get buried.
Up from the ground mushrooms shoot
They look just like dinks
Haiku # 68691, November 9, 2020 6:28 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Cemetery
Longpig smorgasbord
I've chewed my fingernails down
as appetizers
Haiku # 68690, November 9, 2020 6:25 pm ET
by Hungry of I smell Hoomans
Why is it when I
mention canabalism
you fuckers clam up?

We are all just meat.
But I don't want to eat Trump.
I mean, ewww, nasty.
Haiku # 68689, November 9, 2020 5:58 pm ET
by Hannibal's recipe book on Amazon.
Georgia rednecks eat
gay frog maggot cheese burgers
on a glazed brioche.
Haiku # 68688, November 9, 2020 5:55 pm ET
by Joe-rgians Biden their time. of 1, 2, 3, 4... four votes! Hahahaha! (Sesame St. count.)
Alex Jones' gay frogs.
They taste just like normal frogs.
But they're spicier.
Haiku # 68687, November 9, 2020 3:39 pm ET
What's the point of having all those
guns if you're not going to use them.
Stupd Proud Boys should be Ashamed!
Stop the Steal there's no free meal.
Haiku # 68686, November 9, 2020 7:41 am ET
by Grandwizard Figpucker of Georgia -- As in "The Devil Went Down To"... but shouldn't it be "up to".
So how about that cheese w/ maggots in it that those crazy people like to eat, casu marzu. Sardinian goat cheese w/ larvae and it's illegal in some places -- I guess ppl have died from eating it. I mean, that's serioulsy funky. I would probably have to pass on that one, but I've eaten some crazy stuff in my travels. I mean, you know, human flesh is fine, but maggotty cheese... ew. No. Fuck off with that shite. Capisce? Oh, yeah, I forgot, they used to put that in Fear Factor. Crazy show. Anyway.

Grinch or Santa Claus?
Or the infamous Krampus?
Let's put it to vote.
Haiku # 68685, November 9, 2020 7:28 am ET
by I vote for Krampus of B/c he eats children.
Yo Ash r u white?
Why u hate on yo own peeps?
Australian self-hate?
Haiku # 68684, November 9, 2020 4:14 am ET
by Ash Must Be 100 percent Abo
never surrender
and never admit defeat
stay proud but stupid
Haiku # 68683, November 9, 2020 2:01 am ET
by ash
A good sniper shot
is all it would take to start
a revolution.
Haiku # 68682, November 8, 2020 11:31 pm ET
by God has spoken, you infedels. of Allahu Akbar and Stuff!
an old white guy's cum
another old white guy tossed
on clit pus deranged
Haiku # 68681, November 8, 2020 11:27 pm ET
by hash of pipe
Jesus speaks to Trump.
So we should do what he says.
Biden is Satan.
Haiku # 68680, November 8, 2020 11:24 pm ET
by Praise the Lord! of AK-47 and Pick-up Truck
Rubbed dink on French fries.
Time for a new dick 'tater.
Have some mayonaise.
Haiku # 68679, November 8, 2020 11:20 pm ET
by dw
encore fois

an old white guy won
another old white guy lost
on dit plus ca change

(without the cedilla)

au revoir garcon
Haiku # 68678, November 8, 2020 11:12 pm ET
by ash
i fucking knew it
use some foreign character
and bad haiku spits
Haiku # 68677, November 8, 2020 11:11 pm ET
by ash
an old white guy won
another old white guy lost
on dit plus ça change
Haiku # 68676, November 8, 2020 11:10 pm ET
by ash
God fearing rednecks.
Prove your loyalty to Trump.
Kill all Democrats!
Haiku # 68675, November 8, 2020 8:40 pm ET
by God, Jesus, & Holy Ghost
God loves Donald Trump.
You should love Donald Trump too.
Prove it with your guns.
Haiku # 68674, November 8, 2020 7:58 pm ET
by @TheRealGod of #Godiswatching
Trump is the POTUS.
Joe Biden is the SCROTUS.
Get your guns, kiddos!
Haiku # 68673, November 8, 2020 7:55 pm ET
Unlawful riots.
Only BLM does that.
We protect our rights.
Haiku # 68672, November 8, 2020 7:52 pm ET
by Proud Boys of Stop the Steal
Let's take a survey.
How many of you own guns?
Any Democrats?
Haiku # 68671, November 8, 2020 7:50 pm ET
by So I guess I won!
Do you guys know Ash?
That guy writes the best haiku.
Terrific poet.
Haiku # 68670, November 8, 2020 7:48 pm ET
by POTUS Donald Trump
I'm praying for war.
A yuge civil uprising.
We all know I won.
Haiku # 68669, November 8, 2020 7:47 pm ET
by POTUS Donald Trump
The aircon blows high.
I'm trying to hibernate.
Don't care what it costs.
Haiku # 68667, November 8, 2020 4:26 pm ET
by Not a fucking grizzly, but of course I can try.
Life is full of farts.
Enormous toxic butt queefs.
Right up your nostrils.
Haiku # 68666, November 8, 2020 4:21 pm ET
by Emperor Flatus Maximus
Hey true believers
My son was not a white guy
Just thought you should know
Haiku # 68665, November 8, 2020 10:01 am ET
by Gawd
Hey Irvin Baxter
You dirty fornicator
Time to pay the bill
Haiku # 68664, November 8, 2020 8:27 am ET
by Gawd
I found the dummy
It's stuck in the other end
His silence explained
Haiku # 68663, November 8, 2020 7:18 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Exiting White House (Spidey Style)
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