BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years
22 Days
68987 Haikus
I had a strange dream.
Bloody pus came out my nose.
I'd guess a kilo.

More was on the way.
And it actually felt good.
But then I woke up.

I have a head cold.
Maybe it's covid-19.
I don't really care.
Haiku #67727, by DW of Name for an Aussie bike gang: The Bastard Mates
July 23, 2020 10:29 pm ET

I'm not a Christian.
They don't eat balot in hell.
Satan has some taste.
Haiku #67726, by Praise God for that! of DW
July 23, 2020 10:22 pm ET

Trump's a snatch snatcher.
Greedy, arrogant, and rude.
My God! He's like me!
Haiku #67725, by Grab that pussy! of DW -- Going to hell b/c I want to. Satan's not such a bad fellow once you get to know him. At least he's not Filipino!
July 23, 2020 9:39 am ET

Soap is a nice thing
Washes away all the grime
Clean as a whistle
Haiku #67724, by Some whistles are actually quite dirty
July 23, 2020 12:17 am ET

Trump is so evil.
He is totally evil.
Because he's orange.
Haiku #67723, by Neurotic Leftists Virtue-Signaling and Projecting of Still going to HELL for rejecting God in Christ
July 22, 2020 11:48 pm ET

Y'all can suck haiku;
Suck it and then swallow it.
Cause yall is not WOKE
Haiku #67722, by Sleeping Late of Wokeville
July 22, 2020 11:42 pm ET

No one else is here.
How long can I dominate.
King of the dung hill.
Haiku #67721, by DW of No one loves me. Boo hoo. How sad.
July 22, 2020 9:39 pm ET

Fanny packs aren't cool?
Well, shit, when did this happen?
Did I miss something?
Haiku #67720, by DW of Let's play hacky sack and praise Satan.
July 20, 2020 8:40 pm ET

Bubbles in your jizz?
Testicular fartitude.
Jet powered sperm cells.
Haiku #67719, by Darth Whorendous of maybe too much beer
July 20, 2020 7:01 pm ET

White guys aren't so bad.
But orange colored snack products
should not hold office.

Oust the Cheeto-head.
He's the puppet of Chester.
Orange lives don't matter!
Haiku #67718, by DW
July 20, 2020 3:07 pm ET

You mean Joe Biden?
Well, he's not president yet . . .
but yes, he's funny!
Haiku #67717, by Riotous Would-Be Leaders of the Free World
July 20, 2020 9:09 am ET

speaking of white guys
wisdom from that president
is always a riot
Haiku #67716, by ash
July 20, 2020 8:36 am ET

I won't bow down to
Your bombastic testicles
Arrogant and vile
Haiku #67715, by Nell Carter's sexy Gucci purse
July 19, 2020 11:53 pm ET

Oh yes Alemprint.
You the haiku artiste now.
Thanks for blessing us.
Haiku #67714, by Alemprint Appreciation Society
July 18, 2020 8:44 pm ET
Haiku #67713, by Williamtar of Cuba
July 18, 2020 12:43 pm ET

I too would riot.
But my damn White Privilege
Will not allow it.
Haiku #67712, by Secret Asian Man #666
July 17, 2020 11:37 am ET

I want to riot.
But I'm just an old white guy.
With a small penis.
Haiku #67711, by DW
July 16, 2020 9:35 pm ET

I love corona.
I don't have to pay my bills.
Stay home and watch news.

Jack off to riots.
I've always hated the cops.
Always such assholes.

Yes sir, I have crack.
I stuck it way up my crack.
Reach in and get it.
Haiku #67710, by DW of Do I look like a fucking crack head? No, I'm a paint huffer! Big difference!
July 16, 2020 2:49 am ET

That was someone else.
Haven't owned undies in years.
...Except Underoos.

I'm Wonder Woman.
But please don't tell anyone.
Justice League orgies.
Haiku #67709, by Darth Whorendous of I would NEVER soil my Underoos!
July 15, 2020 3:46 pm ET

You soiled your undies....
Stashed in the neighbors mail box...
That's why you got none
Haiku #67708, by Eye in the sky
July 14, 2020 2:48 pm ET

I don't wear undies.
Underwear is oppression.
Like communism.
Haiku #67707, by dw
July 13, 2020 9:43 pm ET

If I could be Jim
I would give my people hell:
Jungle Paradise
Haiku #67706, by White Nights of Disinformation
July 13, 2020 5:41 pm ET

Jim Jones was a star.
I want to be like Jim Jones,
to help The People.
Haiku #67705, by REVOLUTION of Social Justice
July 12, 2020 1:58 pm ET

I am so, so glad
That I'm not Darth's underwear.
Must get quite messy.
Haiku #67704, by Perspectives of DW
July 12, 2020 8:27 am ET

TikTok videos
are too short to jack off to.
Chinese short life span.
Haiku #67703, by "Repent TikTok Man!" said the Harlequin. of DW
July 12, 2020 5:33 am ET

what is happening
i don't get y'all's politics
shut up and eat snot
Haiku #67702, by tall child of Michigan
July 12, 2020 2:22 am ET

There's nothing quite like
retarded children screaming
when you're doing math.
Haiku #67701, by DW of Ah well, God is laughing at me.
July 11, 2020 1:38 am ET

You didn't expect
the Spanish Inquisition
because no one does.
Haiku #67700, by DW of until it's too late.
July 11, 2020 1:36 am ET

The life of Brian.
When he opens the window.
Full Monty Python.
Haiku #67699, by And the crowd goes wild! of DW
July 10, 2020 9:59 pm ET

That butt-naked guy
Playing organ, backwards glance
on Monty Python
Haiku #67698, by Always cracked me up !
July 10, 2020 6:26 pm ET

Breath upon the vine
Pining for blushing faces
Sigh among branches
Haiku #67697, by MONARCH
July 10, 2020 5:27 pm ET

and now for something completely different
Haiku #67696, by that thing that did on monty python of changing scenes
July 10, 2020 5:26 pm ET

Lesbian Marxists
Trying to suppress families.
Do such lives matter?
Haiku #67695, by Woke-Ass Bitch of Tell U How it Iz
July 9, 2020 6:33 pm ET

Christ, that's fucking good!
Phil, I laughed my fat ass off...
Wait, no, it's still there.
Haiku #67694, by DW of need to lose weight. :-(
July 9, 2020 11:11 am ET

Fart while jerking Off?
Then call it gasterbation.
Get out your matches.
Haiku #67693, by Phil Lesh
July 9, 2020 7:13 am ET

When I beat off quick
I call it fasterbation.
Get out your stopwatch.
Haiku #67692, by DW
July 8, 2020 9:27 am ET

Forrest Gump's Jenny
has become an escort girl.
No one is surprised.
Haiku #67691, by DW
July 8, 2020 9:26 am ET
Haiku #67690, by Kolkata escorts of Kolkata, 700016
July 8, 2020 6:34 am ET

Fuck TikTok, you know.
I'll just say it one more time.
Fuck Ticktock... to death!
Haiku #67689, by DW
July 7, 2020 5:32 pm ET

My Whorrendous schlong
has destroyed many small dogs.
And some large rodents.
Haiku #67688, by DW
July 7, 2020 5:30 pm ET

Spew droplets of sick
Flatten curves spiral freefall
Your mask is slipping
Haiku #67687, by Peter 8 of California
July 6, 2020 5:37 pm ET

Darth brings his stink here.
Shuts the site down for two days.
Whorrendous indeed...
Haiku #67686, by Stagnation of Haiku
July 5, 2020 7:07 pm ET

nippress ash gay starwars theme wedding wif midgets
Haiku #67685, by iamback of guess
July 3, 2020 12:23 pm ET

They're not watching porn.
New video equipment.
They're making their own.
Haiku #67684, by Shaolin Porn Hub of Best seller "Fists of Fury"
July 2, 2020 11:25 am ET

The old rice temple:
no more festivals and songs.
They're all watching porn.
Haiku #67683, by Golden Age of Meiji Empire
July 2, 2020 10:01 am ET

Pooh Bear and Eyore?
That piglet and honey-pot?
A.A. Milne? HIS pooh?
Haiku #67682, by Christopher Robin of Winnie the P
July 2, 2020 8:49 am ET

Let's talk about poo.
Just like in the good old days.
Sick of the virus.
Haiku #67681, by DW
July 1, 2020 9:33 pm ET

Planned obsolescence.
Engineered social chaos.
Enriching themselves.
Haiku #67680, by Kill the Godless of Christian Love
July 1, 2020 6:32 pm ET

But what do we suck?
I prefer to suck boobies
When available
Haiku #67679, by Ron Jeremy
July 1, 2020 11:17 am ET

You all truly SUCK.
I just had to declare it.
In stunning haiku.
Haiku #67678, by Bosho Bosh You
June 30, 2020 8:19 pm ET