Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 22 Days and 77403 Haiku later...

Fart while jerking Off?
Then call it gasterbation.
Get out your matches.
Haiku # 67693, July 9, 2020 7:13 am ET
by Phil Lesh
When I beat off quick
I call it fasterbation.
Get out your stopwatch.
Haiku # 67692, July 8, 2020 9:27 am ET
by DW
Forrest Gump's Jenny
has become an escort girl.
No one is surprised.
Haiku # 67691, July 8, 2020 9:26 am ET
by DW
Fuck TikTok, you know.
I'll just say it one more time.
Fuck Ticktock... to death!
Haiku # 67689, July 7, 2020 5:32 pm ET
by DW
My Whorrendous schlong
has destroyed many small dogs.
And some large rodents.
Haiku # 67688, July 7, 2020 5:30 pm ET
by DW
Spew droplets of sick
Flatten curves spiral freefall
Your mask is slipping
Haiku # 67687, July 6, 2020 5:37 pm ET
by Peter 8 of California
Darth brings his stink here.
Shuts the site down for two days.
Whorrendous indeed...
Haiku # 67686, July 5, 2020 7:07 pm ET
by Stagnation of Haiku
nippress ash gay starwars theme wedding wif midgets
Haiku # 67685, July 3, 2020 12:23 pm ET
by iamback of guess
They're not watching porn.
New video equipment.
They're making their own.
Haiku # 67684, July 2, 2020 11:25 am ET
by Shaolin Porn Hub of Best seller "Fists of Fury"
The old rice temple:
no more festivals and songs.
They're all watching porn.
Haiku # 67683, July 2, 2020 10:01 am ET
by Golden Age of Meiji Empire
Pooh Bear and Eyore?
That piglet and honey-pot?
A.A. Milne? HIS pooh?
Haiku # 67682, July 2, 2020 8:49 am ET
by Christopher Robin of Winnie the P
Let's talk about poo.
Just like in the good old days.
Sick of the virus.
Haiku # 67681, July 1, 2020 9:33 pm ET
by DW
Planned obsolescence.
Engineered social chaos.
Enriching themselves.
Haiku # 67680, July 1, 2020 6:32 pm ET
by Kill the Godless of Christian Love
But what do we suck?
I prefer to suck boobies
When available
Haiku # 67679, July 1, 2020 11:17 am ET
by Ron Jeremy
You all truly SUCK.
I just had to declare it.
In stunning haiku.
Haiku # 67678, June 30, 2020 8:19 pm ET
by Bosho Bosh You
tragic adolescents
indifferent narcissists
who know everything
Haiku # 67677, June 30, 2020 7:04 am ET
by ash
We have stopped caring.
Whatever your problem is,
Please do not tell us.
Haiku # 67676, June 28, 2020 11:42 pm ET
by The Borg Collective
It was hard ass work
I put my elbow grease there
Got a hernia
Haiku # 67675, June 28, 2020 4:06 pm ET
by Dick Sakwrinkle of Wino Parade
Worst haiku all time
And it rhymes fuck yeah it rhymes
Worst haiku all time
Haiku # 67674, June 28, 2020 3:59 pm ET
by Dick Sakwrinkle of Wino Parade
White cherry blossoms:
The petals fall like fresh snow.
Now there's a haiku!
Haiku # 67673, June 26, 2020 7:34 am ET
by Boring Images of the Orient (yawn)
wave your haiku peen
till the poetry erupts
was that good for you ?
Haiku # 67672, June 26, 2020 7:23 am ET
by ash
Your haiku is bad.
Your verse does not flow smoothly.
It's not poetic.
Haiku # 67671, June 25, 2020 8:51 am ET
by An Accomplished Haiku Poet of Clown World
Nobody loves me.
So I'll post it on Facebook.
Look at all the hearts.
Haiku # 67670, June 25, 2020 8:36 am ET
by Your ex-girlfriends poodle's previous owner's mother-in-law's garden gnome
Only mine are good.
My haiku is very good.
So clever. So good.
Haiku # 67669, June 24, 2020 3:00 pm ET
by greater than Basho
more accurately
for a very long time now
they are mostly bad
Haiku # 67668, June 24, 2020 8:26 am ET
by ash
once upon a time
there were a lot of haiku
and they were all bad
Haiku # 67667, June 24, 2020 8:24 am ET
by ash
someone summarize
all the bad haiku i've missed
in haiku form, please
Haiku # 67666, June 23, 2020 9:22 pm ET
by scotch of not too much to ask
prarie dog refuge
of connected passageways
apartment complex
Haiku # 67665, June 23, 2020 2:44 am ET
by B. Johnston of Ks
ancient drive in with
damaged parking area
forest habitat
Haiku # 67664, June 23, 2020 2:36 am ET
by B. Johnston of Ks
a bunch of giant
toddlers paid by soros on
a history smash
Haiku # 67663, June 22, 2020 2:29 pm ET
by vhs
colour me outraged
by all things beyond the pale
of purest snowflake
Haiku # 67662, June 22, 2020 9:10 am ET
by ash
Excising blackheads.
I can watch YouTube all day.
People getting killed.
Haiku # 67661, June 20, 2020 3:29 am ET
by Darth Whorendous of Oh, no, but we can't show any titties!
Let's cancel all school.
We don't need no educa
shun. Books are stupid.
Haiku # 67660, June 20, 2020 3:26 am ET
by Darth Whorendous
Enough of all this!
Let's talk about Godzilla.
Important matters.

Where did he come from?
How does he sustain himself?
Does he have a wife?
Haiku # 67659, June 19, 2020 8:18 pm ET
by Darth Sick of Lockdown Whorendous of Over there.
All you haiku cucks.
You fill me with pure disgust.
Because you exist.
Haiku # 67658, June 19, 2020 7:52 pm ET
by Haiku of Existence
arbitrary rules
endless conspiracies and
illuminati
Haiku # 67657, June 18, 2020 10:20 am ET
by vhs of somewhere
Wake up, wake up, and
stand because to sit is to
idly die, no thanks
Haiku # 67656, June 17, 2020 12:47 am ET
by Line of lines
Reparations? Hmmmmm...
Already paid: public schools,
social services.
Haiku # 67655, June 16, 2020 7:26 pm ET
by Unwelcome Truths of Yo Ma Ma
could you imagine
if a solid concrete dick
were posted then torn

down???
Haiku # 67653, June 14, 2020 2:17 pm ET
by vhs
Coming erection
Of Great Reader Donard Trump
Will make many mad.
Haiku # 67652, June 14, 2020 12:49 pm ET
by Worthy Oriental Gentleman
any construction
including a monument
is an erection
Haiku # 67651, June 13, 2020 9:23 pm ET
by ash
Ash what do you mean?
You talk about erections.
That is truly weird.
Haiku # 67650, June 13, 2020 7:04 pm ET
by Homo Erectus of Anthropology
drop those old statues
pulling white men's erections
is what they love most
Haiku # 67649, June 13, 2020 10:13 am ET
by ash
i wave my placard
"white nihilists don't matter"
but they just don't care
Haiku # 67648, June 13, 2020 10:08 am ET
by ash
Racists everywhere!
Under your bed, up your ass...
The problem is YOU.
Haiku # 67647, June 13, 2020 5:53 am ET
by Eat Your Heart Out on a Plastic tray
I'm going for a
Degree in Gender Studies
Adios, racists!
Haiku # 67646, June 13, 2020 12:01 am ET
by iPhone 11 User
Filthy Anarchists,
High on their Marxist ideals:
Useful idiots
Haiku # 67645, June 12, 2020 3:47 pm ET
by This Deserves to End Badly
Viva Seattle!
It's REVOLUTION, baby.
Ummm . . . please send some food.
Haiku # 67644, June 12, 2020 3:29 pm ET
by Help, mom. We're out of Bullets and Spray-Paint
is this still going?
random posts in a peaceful
more cynical time
Haiku # 67643, June 12, 2020 12:03 pm ET
by vhs
The clowns matter too!
Kneel before a clown right now.
Clown reparations.
Haiku # 67642, June 10, 2020 9:04 pm ET
by Clown Awareness of Honk Honk
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