Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 341 Days and 72827 Haikus later...

I wait for haiku.
But you don't write anything.
So go hang yourself.
Haiku # 66598, December 20, 2019 10:12 pm ET
by Poetes Maudits of Gender-based Languages
my hipster lament
reading email in cafe
coffee is now cold
Haiku # 66597, December 20, 2019 2:32 pm ET
by studboy of Los Angeles, CA
Christmas carols, joy,
The divine light of Jesus...
now shut up and BUY.
Haiku # 66596, December 19, 2019 7:30 am ET
by Guy from holiday car commercial
Now, back to Greta:
Shame on you. Oh, how DARE you
make that nasty face.
Haiku # 66595, December 18, 2019 9:43 pm ET
by The Sky is Falling of Chicken Little
Eh, don't call me that.
Even you are mocking me
And abusing, eh.
Haiku # 66594, December 18, 2019 8:16 pm ET
by Kunta Kinte of White Privilege
After meating you
I would like to eating you.
Signed: nerdy tech guy.
Haiku # 66593, December 18, 2019 8:13 pm ET
by German "Frankie" of that weird Dark Web story
Doing a rhino
Ain't as easy as it sounds.
They can drink a LOT.

Once drunk, they let go.
The proverbial wildcat.
I mean all night long.
Haiku # 66592, December 18, 2019 2:10 am ET
by DRR of Take notes, Kunta Kinte.
Trichinosis types
Haikus for you: worms pull strings
Attaching limbs, brain
Haiku # 66591, December 18, 2019 12:51 am ET
by 137 Degrees Fahrenheit
Jihadi surprise:
Get 72 virgins
All Gilbert Gottfried
Haiku # 66590, December 18, 2019 12:34 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Divorcing the pig.
Looking for a good rhino.
One that smashes things.
Haiku # 66589, December 17, 2019 11:41 pm ET
by DRR of Tranquilizer gun not needed.
A truly vile place
Swarming with smug liberals
Virtue-signaling
Haiku # 66588, December 17, 2019 11:05 pm ET
by Hell, of course
Bring it ON, you bots
Write something about Greta
(That scowling meatball)
Haiku # 66587, December 17, 2019 9:57 am ET
by Pippi Longstockingholm Syndrome of "How DARE you".
Bots suck at poetry.
They write boring Haiku too.
They have no humor.
Haiku # 66586, December 17, 2019 9:47 am ET
by Some Humans Resemble Bots
PROOF HUMANITY
IS DEHUMANIZING: AUTO-
-BOTS ASSEMBLE!
Haiku # 66585, December 16, 2019 11:26 pm ET
by OPTIMIST PRIME of PROOF OF HUMANITY REQUIREMENT IS RACIST
Greta Thunberg died,
Went to heaven and told them:
You should be ASHAMED.
Haiku # 66584, December 16, 2019 9:26 pm ET
by Nasty Scowling Little Twit of the Progressive North
i wonder if i got
more people here people might
actually use this
Haiku # 66583, December 16, 2019 3:30 pm ET
by vhs
New movie project-
About Greta the screecher-
No its not a joke-

She wanders around
Hollering "how dare you" loud!
all over the world!

Earth ends in eight years!
That is what weird Greta says!
I mean bellows out

Sure to be a hit!
Teenage girl points her finger
At adults and bitches!
Haiku # 66582, December 16, 2019 2:23 pm ET
by Don't go to school of earth ends in eight years
Grumpy lil Greta
Grouchy earth-actvist elf
Kicked out by Santa
Haiku # 66581, December 16, 2019 11:01 am ET
by Santa of Satan
Christmastime: Sweden
Thunbergs didn't get pony
Greta: "HOW DARE YOU
Haiku # 66580, December 16, 2019 11:00 am ET
by You've Stolen My Dreams of I Should Be Outside Riding a Pony
That scowl: "how DARE you."
The breathy troubled-girl-tone.
It still makes me cringe.
Haiku # 66579, December 15, 2019 10:24 pm ET
by Cover of Time
UN berated
By Swedish teen: an oddly
Specific fetish
Haiku # 66578, December 15, 2019 8:25 pm ET
by Innocent Bystander
A hillside at night
Man, lady turn into trees...
Ain't seen that before
Haiku # 66577, December 14, 2019 10:20 pm ET
by Etz
HOW DARE YOU
I SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL
ACROSS THE OCEAN
NOT WRITING BAD HAIKU
Haiku # 66576, December 14, 2019 9:56 pm ET
by Greta Thunberg of Sverige
Lil Greta earth-girl,
Scowling scolding Swedish brat:
warming's where it's AT.
Haiku # 66575, December 13, 2019 11:26 am ET
by Sven Sverige of The Win on Warmin'
Lil grumpy Greta
Is the person of the year?
Not Hongkie Rebels?

Honkies fight slavers
Red Communist SOB's
Damn near to the death

As little Greta
Fly's in on a giant airplane
And blasts out carbon

That's pretty funny
The kid just hollers damn loud
and pulls a grimace.
Haiku # 66574, December 13, 2019 5:41 am ET
by Eric Blowhard of CIA HQ
Well now Democrats
Your impeachment gone to Schifft
All your base now ours.

Is it possible?
For you to get more stupid?
have to wait and see.
Haiku # 66573, December 13, 2019 5:16 am ET
by Eric Blowhard of CIA HQ.
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the in the damn head
One too many times I head
One too many times I think
Punched think
Punched in the damn head
One thehd any times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One many times I think
Punched
in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn headOne too many times I think
Puned in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched ihe damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched head
One too many times I think in the damn
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I thinkPunched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Haiku # 66572, December 13, 2019 12:24 am ET
by Professional Boxer of I forget but I like to eat crayons and see what color my poop will be
I don't bang hippos.
I mean, hippos are nasty.
Their vaginas stink.
Haiku # 66571, December 12, 2019 9:43 pm ET
by DRR of I guess it rains down in Aaaaafrica. Ebola Cola.
Reverse donkey show.
Just for the ladies only.
Si Senorita.
Haiku # 66570, December 12, 2019 9:32 pm ET
by Darth Rhinoraper of Prepping for debauchery.
If your cock's so huge,
why don't you fuck a donkey
in Tijuana.

On marijuana.
Haiku # 66569, December 12, 2019 9:28 pm ET
by Darth Rhinoraper. of Gazelles are tight!
Peep be all like: "damn
I ain't HAVE no lexicon;
ain't GOT grammar."
Haiku # 66568, December 12, 2019 8:55 am ET
by Dr. Tyrone McWhite PHD
I will rewrite it for you as Haiku.
You can pay me later:

News anchor's great tits.
It's a sunny day. I feel
a bit jiggy. Unh!
Haiku # 66567, December 12, 2019 7:57 am ET
by Free Haiku Life-coaching of Hot Newsladies
The news anchor has great tits.
It's a sunny day and I feel
a bit jiggy
Haiku # 66566, December 12, 2019 7:35 am ET
by Ben Dover of London
My boss just farted.
Does anyone read
haiku any
more?
Haiku # 66565, December 12, 2019 7:33 am ET
by Mike Pence of Washington
When your wife's a whore
you will lose all your money.
You should fuck chickens!
Haiku # 66564, December 12, 2019 4:34 am ET
by Baw-Kawwwwk! of Mmmmm.... Omelettes!
Once apon a time
Out in the Italian west
Frank gunned them down

Old Henry Fonda
Played mercy less killer
Long barreled .45

But Harmonica-
laid down some scruffy vengeance-
shot Frank full of lead

Best you see the film
"Once Apon A Time Out West"
Gun smoke and drama.

Never better made
And Ms. Cardinale has
Magnificent boobs!
Haiku # 66563, December 12, 2019 3:10 am ET
by Pike Bishop of Starbuck Texas
it's a bad haiku
I'm still writing anyways
Let me end this now
Haiku # 66562, December 11, 2019 11:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
2,4-DNP
Mixed with carbonyl compounds
Makes some orange shit
Haiku # 66561, December 11, 2019 11:19 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Boxing is stupid
With fucking awesome prizes
It ain't so simple
Haiku # 66560, December 11, 2019 10:54 pm ET
by Bleating Bigfoot Baby
You play stupid games
And you get stupid prizes
It's very simple
Haiku # 66559, December 11, 2019 10:15 pm ET
by You Reap What You Sow
Impeachment Circus:
DC donkey horny for
America's ass
Haiku # 66558, December 11, 2019 8:03 pm ET
by Innocent Bystander of far outside the big top circus tent wondering if at a certain point gang rape actually becomes a consensual gang bang by tacit a
Christmas is so nice!
Cozy houses, snow, fireplace--
And then some haiku.
Haiku # 66557, December 10, 2019 9:02 pm ET
by Then police show up of Domestic Violence Charges
Donald Trump Space Force
The First President of Mars
Make Mars Great Again
Haiku # 66556, December 10, 2019 7:13 pm ET
by Malfunction of Elon Musk's Brainchip
Devil's body shop:
Amsterdam red-light district.
Shiny shapes displayed.
Haiku # 66555, December 10, 2019 6:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Insurance agents.
And the body shop jokers.
Work for the devil.
Haiku # 66554, December 10, 2019 2:49 am ET
by Lonesum Polecat of Dog Patch
Age electronic!
"Its in the bitch computer"
Computer don't work.
Haiku # 66553, December 10, 2019 2:47 am ET
by Lonesum Polecat of Dog Patch
No suns of bitches
Can do their fucking damn jobs
Cheat, steal, rob, fuck heads
Haiku # 66552, December 10, 2019 2:43 am ET
by Lonesum Polecat of Dog Patch
Bad luck compounded
Every mother fucking day
Always raining shit
Haiku # 66551, December 10, 2019 2:40 am ET
by Lonesum Polecat of Dog Patch
Need a like button
so I can hit it for you
and make you like me.
Haiku # 66550, December 9, 2019 5:50 pm ET
by Likeability Factor of Revulsion
Asian Bacchantes
Rend poor Pentheus in pieces
Just to get Green Card
Haiku # 66549, December 9, 2019 3:26 pm ET
by Minor Asian Tragedy of You Rippa Deez?
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >