BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
24 Days
and
66527 Haikus
later...
i still get mad at
the critiques out there but you
know this...learn to code
Haiku #61888, by vhs
January 30, 2019 3:34 am ET

censorship on line
the modern terror, gulags
empty headed skulls
Haiku #61887, by vhs
January 30, 2019 3:33 am ET

move on from the plat
form that mocks thy content and
let then speak to void
Haiku #61886, by vhs
January 30, 2019 3:31 am ET

And for no reason
People just started hugging
All over the world
Haiku #61885, by This gave me a boner
January 30, 2019 1:27 am ET

I've said it before
You know I'll say it again
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt!
Haiku #61884, by Red Snapper of Fish Market
January 30, 2019 12:41 am ET

Remember the time
You took the axe from your trunk
Fun in the graveyard
Haiku #61883, by French Kissers of Graveyard
January 30, 2019 12:38 am ET

Eagles hate the man
He emulates seagull style
Falls flat on his face
Haiku #61882, by Lunchmeat president of Garbage chute
January 29, 2019 11:21 pm ET

if iran is so far
away, and it could not get
away, oh wrong lyrics!
Haiku #61881, by bloody flock of seagulls it was i swear! of deink vhs
January 29, 2019 10:37 pm ET

Meow and meow
Will anyone hear me now
Lost up in this tree?
Haiku #61880, by Starkitten of Treetops
January 29, 2019 10:02 pm ET

Don't mind if I do
One person with junk of two
Give myself a screw
Haiku #61879, by Conjoined headless something or other of Freak Show
January 29, 2019 6:59 pm ET

Intersectional
Cisgender-based buzz
Pure incoherence
Haiku #61878, by Ha Ha of Only 2 Genders
January 29, 2019 5:26 pm ET

Starkitten! Descend.
Come down off of that tree branch.
You are way too high.
Haiku #61877, by Ladder of Local Fire Dept.
January 29, 2019 2:18 pm ET

Intoxicating
Fizzy Haiku Elixir
Don
Haiku #61876, by High AF starkitten of Cloud 5-7-5
January 29, 2019 1:47 pm ET

Haiku will save us.
Haiku will defeat evil.
Count syllables. Yup.
Haiku #61875, by Triumphal Entry into the Immortal Halls of Glory upon Parnassus' Holy Peak
January 29, 2019 8:06 am ET

Let the poems flow
Something for everyone here
Don't give up on it
Haiku #61874, by Anonymous Poet
January 28, 2019 11:18 pm ET

The only reason
Haiku has been ridiculed
It's ridiculous
Haiku #61873, by Poem in my bum
January 28, 2019 11:16 pm ET

This wrinkly flesh rod
The patent holder is God
The Holy Boomstick
Haiku #61872, by Triskelion (yawn) of 3 legged race
January 28, 2019 10:20 pm ET

Dude. Whip that thing out
In five-seven-five haiku.
That's IT? What a joke.
Haiku #61871, by Flash of Inspiration
January 28, 2019 6:52 pm ET

Measure for measure
It's a national treasure
Designed for Pleasure
Haiku #61870, by Anonymous Poet
January 28, 2019 6:13 pm ET

I pity da fool
Who thinks he's got a big tool
Mine is the longest
Haiku #61869, by Anonymous Poet
January 28, 2019 6:12 pm ET

To never get past
membranes, glands, body fluids...
Pity that poet!
Haiku #61868, by Poet of Show It
January 28, 2019 5:52 pm ET

I dream of Jeanie
Now then, Did she menstruate?
Or Blink it away?
Haiku #61867, by Viewer of In front of screen
January 28, 2019 5:14 pm ET

Mona Lisa smile
Barbara Walters lisping smile
Smile Vertically
Haiku #61866, by Guy Smiley
January 28, 2019 5:11 pm ET

Whatever you want
I guarantee you it's here
On this fine website
Haiku #61865, by Fan
January 28, 2019 5:09 pm ET

That Mona Walter
and Ayaan Hirsi Ali:
women for our age.

https://tinyurl.com/yd43zl24

https://tinyurl.com/ybrqeax9
Haiku #61864, by Galab Wanaagsan of Kushitic Punt
January 28, 2019 2:09 pm ET

Walk into the gloom
Yes, it's all waiting for you
You will blend right in
Haiku #61863, by Gray Person
January 28, 2019 3:39 am ET

Ghosts are a problem
Like when they sit behind you
Making pottery
Haiku #61862, by Demi
January 28, 2019 3:35 am ET

of course i do, who?
i used to chew, tobacco
now i dont do that
Haiku #61861, by vhs
January 27, 2019 10:28 pm ET

The Pope had to poop
Squishing would not work this time
Too late, shit his gown
Haiku #61860, by Shatagain City
January 27, 2019 10:08 pm ET

Praying at the moon
Christian Werewolf here to serve
And play the oldies
Haiku #61859, by Bee Bop a loo ba
January 27, 2019 9:44 pm ET


Seems like you finally
Got that five-seven-five thing
down consistently
Haiku #61858, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 7:35 pm ET

someone directed
inspirational christian
stuff to my twitter!!!
Haiku #61857, by vhs of not an inspirational Christian
January 27, 2019 7:11 pm ET

the folks who post here
or on twitter, i do we
don't know each other

well someone does but...
other than that...
Haiku #61856, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:46 pm ET

yes i did go through
that incarnation here and
I'm still mouthy toots
Haiku #61855, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:42 pm ET

Q for VHS:
are you the one named Moxie
from way back Haiku?
Haiku #61854, by Mainely of Maine
January 27, 2019 6:40 pm ET

There is Lord of Lords,
there is also Lourdes of Lourdes.
Darth is lewd of lewds.
Haiku #61853, by Lard of Lards
January 27, 2019 6:36 pm ET

Fauntleroy! That's rich.
I call my son Fauntleroy
When I'm trolling him.
Haiku #61852, by Fauntlressa of Distressa
January 27, 2019 6:33 pm ET

Lordy oh Lordy
more like a pun haiku then
doth praiseth the Lord--e...
Haiku #61851, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:32 pm ET

The Lord of the Dance?
Or Little Lord Fauntleroy?
Or Lord of the Rings?
Haiku #61850, by Lourdes of Lourdes
January 27, 2019 6:26 pm ET

well it is a post
as a break in the music
for more haikuing
Haiku #61849, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:22 pm ET

Haiku wake-up call!
Who is on the Lord's side, huh?
YOU? Or your mother...
Haiku #61848, by Mama knows best of course
January 27, 2019 4:55 pm ET

V.H.S. that's nice
But pasting a URL
is not real haiku.
Haiku #61847, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 4:50 pm ET

https://nypost.com/2018/08/03/how-liberals-turned-against-free-speech/
Haiku #61846, by vhs
January 27, 2019 3:22 pm ET

Brian Wilson's aunt
My cousin was working there
Oops sorry typo
Haiku #61845, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 1:06 pm ET

Brian Wilson's WHAT?
Your head is in a bad place.
Really, you need help.
Haiku #61844, by Help of Haiku Hell
January 27, 2019 12:55 pm ET

Brian Wilson's taint
Just ordered a large pizza
From Little Caesar's
Haiku #61843, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 2:36 am ET

Gnarly Tsunami
My reefer got soaking wet
And my penis shriveled
Haiku #61842, by Little Surfer
January 27, 2019 2:31 am ET

Is a penis
Haiku #61841, by Anonymous Poet
January 26, 2019 11:28 pm ET

It
Haiku #61840, by Peppermint Poontang
January 26, 2019 11:28 pm ET

Old soda machine
Only has lemonade drinks
Gah! It
Haiku #61839, by I want my money back
January 26, 2019 11:27 pm ET