BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
318 Days
and
68162 Haikus
later...
Walk into the gloom
Yes, it's all waiting for you
You will blend right in
Haiku #61863, by Gray Person
January 28, 2019 3:39 am ET

Ghosts are a problem
Like when they sit behind you
Making pottery
Haiku #61862, by Demi
January 28, 2019 3:35 am ET

of course i do, who?
i used to chew, tobacco
now i dont do that
Haiku #61861, by vhs
January 27, 2019 10:28 pm ET

The Pope had to poop
Squishing would not work this time
Too late, shit his gown
Haiku #61860, by Shatagain City
January 27, 2019 10:08 pm ET

Praying at the moon
Christian Werewolf here to serve
And play the oldies
Haiku #61859, by Bee Bop a loo ba
January 27, 2019 9:44 pm ET


Seems like you finally
Got that five-seven-five thing
down consistently
Haiku #61858, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 7:35 pm ET

someone directed
inspirational christian
stuff to my twitter!!!
Haiku #61857, by vhs of not an inspirational Christian
January 27, 2019 7:11 pm ET

the folks who post here
or on twitter, i do we
don't know each other

well someone does but...
other than that...
Haiku #61856, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:46 pm ET

yes i did go through
that incarnation here and
I'm still mouthy toots
Haiku #61855, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:42 pm ET

Q for VHS:
are you the one named Moxie
from way back Haiku?
Haiku #61854, by Mainely of Maine
January 27, 2019 6:40 pm ET

There is Lord of Lords,
there is also Lourdes of Lourdes.
Darth is lewd of lewds.
Haiku #61853, by Lard of Lards
January 27, 2019 6:36 pm ET

Fauntleroy! That's rich.
I call my son Fauntleroy
When I'm trolling him.
Haiku #61852, by Fauntlressa of Distressa
January 27, 2019 6:33 pm ET

Lordy oh Lordy
more like a pun haiku then
doth praiseth the Lord--e...
Haiku #61851, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:32 pm ET

The Lord of the Dance?
Or Little Lord Fauntleroy?
Or Lord of the Rings?
Haiku #61850, by Lourdes of Lourdes
January 27, 2019 6:26 pm ET

well it is a post
as a break in the music
for more haikuing
Haiku #61849, by vhs
January 27, 2019 6:22 pm ET

Haiku wake-up call!
Who is on the Lord's side, huh?
YOU? Or your mother...
Haiku #61848, by Mama knows best of course
January 27, 2019 4:55 pm ET

V.H.S. that's nice
But pasting a URL
is not real haiku.
Haiku #61847, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 4:50 pm ET

https://nypost.com/2018/08/03/how-liberals-turned-against-free-speech/
Haiku #61846, by vhs
January 27, 2019 3:22 pm ET

Brian Wilson's aunt
My cousin was working there
Oops sorry typo
Haiku #61845, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 1:06 pm ET

Brian Wilson's WHAT?
Your head is in a bad place.
Really, you need help.
Haiku #61844, by Help of Haiku Hell
January 27, 2019 12:55 pm ET

Brian Wilson's taint
Just ordered a large pizza
From Little Caesar's
Haiku #61843, by Anonymous Poet
January 27, 2019 2:36 am ET

Gnarly Tsunami
My reefer got soaking wet
And my penis shriveled
Haiku #61842, by Little Surfer
January 27, 2019 2:31 am ET

Is a penis
Haiku #61841, by Anonymous Poet
January 26, 2019 11:28 pm ET

It
Haiku #61840, by Peppermint Poontang
January 26, 2019 11:28 pm ET

Old soda machine
Only has lemonade drinks
Gah! It
Haiku #61839, by I want my money back
January 26, 2019 11:27 pm ET

Lick your inner wrists
Now hold them in the air
Kangaroo A/C
Haiku #61838, by Kangaroo of Australia
January 26, 2019 9:29 pm ET

high humidity
another stinking hot day
enough already
Haiku #61837, by ash
January 26, 2019 9:23 pm ET

Seen on milk carton
Abducted: Darth Figpucker
Darth, please come home now
Haiku #61836, by Anonymous Poet
January 26, 2019 8:23 pm ET

Oh I wouldn't mind
Come out of hibernation
A friendly bear hug
Haiku #61835, by When Hairy met Silly of Bear Trail
January 26, 2019 6:43 pm ET

Gentle wave rises...
happy fishermen look up;
CRASH! Death. (tsunami)
Haiku #61834, by Yo Yo Ma of Yo Mama
January 26, 2019 6:27 pm ET

of course some bears are
very hairy guys...I'm a bear
shall i maul you then :)
Haiku #61833, by vhs
January 26, 2019 6:20 pm ET

Did we give up pork
It's just been chicken and fish
Eat out every day
Haiku #61832, by Anonymous Poet
January 26, 2019 6:03 pm ET

Bears and who they maul
Common Denominator
God damn foolishness
Haiku #61831, by Anonymous Poet
January 26, 2019 6:01 pm ET

i think we are thinking
of the evil dead movies
as to evil trees...
Haiku #61830, by vhs
January 26, 2019 6:00 pm ET

nyaahh...pearls before swine
so they say of the treasures of the earth
"I have the body of a pig...grunt, grunt"
Haiku #61829, by vhs
January 26, 2019 5:59 pm ET

Rising to power
A force to be reckoned with
John Boy Walton's Mole
Haiku #61828, by Ignoring this facial growth of Pimple is n the ass of progress
January 26, 2019 5:58 pm ET

In the Walden Woods
The trees will pull your pants off
And tickle your nuts
Haiku #61827, by Outdoor Enthusiasts
January 26, 2019 5:56 pm ET

the ones who are your
elders who are enlightened show
or listen to you

pride versus love
Haiku #61826, by vhs
January 26, 2019 5:44 pm ET

Frumpy old liberals
Think they are so enlightened
But they're just frumpy
Haiku #61825, by Frump Derangement
January 26, 2019 4:31 pm ET

Well I'll go to walden
anyways screw what some guy
or gal on twitter says
Haiku #61824, by vhs
January 26, 2019 4:03 pm ET

Those frumpy womnen
Will suck the life out of you
Five Alarm Blow Jobs
Haiku #61823, by Dickspatcher of Station
January 26, 2019 2:02 pm ET

Sno-Cone Machiine Gun
Rat a tat Rat a Tat Splat
Fecal Fudge Flavour
Haiku #61822, by 7-11 24/7 of #2
January 26, 2019 2:00 pm ET

Bro, what's not to love
Your God created us all
In his own image
Haiku #61821, by Creature of the Lordt
January 26, 2019 1:58 pm ET

Old balding Leftists
Nasty frumpy Lib women
They are all so vile
Haiku #61820, by God God and more GOD
January 26, 2019 8:29 am ET

Farting machine gun
Rat a tat Rat a tat splat
Can your ass do that?
Haiku #61819, by You know who of You know where
January 26, 2019 3:33 am ET

When they come for you
Will anybody notice?
Who will hear your scream?
Haiku #61818, by Anonymous Poet
January 25, 2019 10:16 pm ET

Took her dog style too
Always left her wanting more
Puny pink penis
Haiku #61817, by Anonymous Poet
January 25, 2019 7:45 pm ET

Thoreau was a fake.
Ate meals at his sister's house.
Not at WALDEN POND.
Haiku #61816, by Transcend THIS, dimwit
January 25, 2019 5:27 pm ET

Hung up my girdle
From a low hanging tree branch
Some pervert swiped it
Haiku #61815, by Girdle less in the forest
January 25, 2019 5:04 pm ET

Tree stump down yonder
Designated fart hassock
The comforts of home
Haiku #61814, by A place for everything of Everything in its place
January 25, 2019 5:02 pm ET