Grunting in the rain
Wiping with the biggest leaves
Damp. dank. A delight
by Anonymous Poet
No one ever sees
So I have set up brocadcast
Next bowel movement
by Anonymous Poet
When I see name Darth
I know what it will smell like.
I don't bother read
by Anonymous Poet
I knew a queer kid.
He held a branch to his groin
and petted a tree.
He liked to be punched.
And always piss off bullies.
Jizzed his pants when beat.
He didn't live long.
Got killed by a homeless dude.
The best thing for him.
I laughed when I heard.
I know that sounds really bad.
But you just don't know.
by df
When midgets dress up
and look just like garden gnomes
with crotchless panties.
by df
The doc was surprised.
I had Dutch Elm in my ass.
How did that happen?!
by df
Listen, Elm tree here
I talk all day and all night
I tell dirty jokes
Don
by Elm tree
Trees know how to speak.
They talk about the weather.
So no one listens.
by the hair of the dog
You smoking spider plants again
by Anonymous Poet
Which do you prefer
The real deal or garden gnomes?
Little Superstar!
by He
Dwarves always do that.
Snow White's honeymoon was strange.
Well, back then it was.
Nowadays not so.
Post-wedding midget orgies.
Commonplace these days.
by df
It's not that simple
I have kept the bugs away
With a magic spell
It's temporary
I adjusted your fart smell
This keeps them at bay
Unfortunately
You now attract horny dwarves
They'll climb up your schlong!!
by You know who
This is crazy but
since my brain bleeding it seems
mosquitoes won't bite.
Like maybe my blood
is clotting more than normal
and they don't want it.
I know, it's bizarre.
But I swear to you it's true.
And I hate them more.
Their death brings me joy.
If only they were sentient.
I could hear their screams.
by df
Penes paninis.
Dolphin cock on toasted rye.
Why? Because we can.
by df. The life goal of of all Asians is to eat at least once every animal on this planet.
Human Tortoise Man
Live in your own dugout ass
It's one stop shopping
And might I add here
As I finished my Haiku
My dog cut a fart
He was climbing up
To sit with me on the chair
That's when he let wind
by Me of Keeping you in the loop
Super volcano.
Yellowstone apocalypse.
God I love YouTube!
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
The ass smell of dog
is indeed the dog's perfume.
Channel #5.
Tortoises eat poop.
But I have no idea why.
Protein or microbes.
Maybe I'll try it.
Could be why they live so long.
And what a great life!
Eating grass and poop.
Living in a dug out hole.
Yeah, I could do that.
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Standard Poodle dog
Manicured nails. French perfume
Still got smelly ass
by Master of Pet Salon
Bears up on the roof!
Shazam! Shazam! Wankwankwank!!
Under arm fart sound
by Goofus
The smell of your yawn
Is of Werther's and dead fish
Stop eating out Gran
by Commas are funny
'Twas a perfect storm
Mark Wahlberg jizzed off the deck
Battened the hatches
by Mother Goose of Storytime
Beezlebop bop bop
Ram a lam a ding dong goo
YABBA DABBA DOO!!
by Anonymous Poet
Buddha ran away
I noticed for the first time
Buddah's big red ass
by Anonymous Poet
They were up Shit's Creek
Fishing for compliments
Hey, Awesome Haiku!
by Anonymous Poet
What were those men like,
the fishermen in the storm?
Likely not poets!
by df
As the baby cries
I think of Buddhist wisdom.
Buddha ran away.
by df
Yawn and open wide.
My poop flies into your mouth.
You want flies with that?
by df
Your poop is boring.
Your haiku is boring too.
Got me yawning now.
by Anonymous Poet
Go watch Doodie Man.
I think it's up your alley.
Somersaults and poop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOqn2Ms61Y8
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Go watch Doodie Man.
I think it's up your alley.
Somersaults and poop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOqn2Ms61Y8
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Kangaroo Penis
Australian delicacy
Serve in hot dog bun
by Mr. Tube Steak
Kidnapped by perverts
Hell of a situation
Send help, please...and lube
by Anonymous Poet
A clear view of you
Cartwheelcartwheelcartwheel fart
Shit my pants again
by Craprobatic of Cartwheeling to the latrine (might as well)
Where are the poets?
They're kidnapped by aliens!
Anal probes commence!
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
A gay kangaroo
can bound across a flat stretch
of ground with each jump
carrying the roo
11 m from the
jump point. Fabulous!
If the kangaroo
leaves the ground at a 18
degree angle, what
is its takeoff speed?
What's its horizontal speed?
How gay is the roo?
by Darth Figpucker of Fabulous Physics!
a hundred years on
and the war to end all wars
still wasn't the one
by ash
Mall pet store monkey
Pleasing organ melodies
by Anonymous Poet
I wouldn
by Anonymous Poet
I's go meet him thar.
Mofo better have money.
Else I rob his kicks!
by df
John-boy's holy mole
Judges your vile unbelief.
Walton mountain rules.
by Anonymous Poet
Just saw God drive by
Headed to the keg party
Should I confront him?
by John Boy Walton of Cheek
We a go dub it
And then we a go rock it.
Fock dem Babylon!
by Babylonian Unbelief
Watch what you're saying!
God came to me in a dream.
He stole my half ounce.
Some damn good hydro!
So if anyone sees God,
let me know asap.
by df
God is a sad joke
Played upon stupid people
They just don't get it
by Anonymous Poet
Twice in the past week
Opened up my door. Surprise
Pair of nude mormons
by Elder sphincter and elder barry
Please let me pull it
I am not a nurse but, hey
I am a big guy
by Nurse
Nude acrobatics.
X-Hamster X-men powers.
Genital lawn darts.
A blindfold mounting
from thirty feet up in the air.
All nine inches in.
Brazilian fart girls
blow down card house from ten feet.
A clean hurricane!
They don't shit themselves.
You should learn sphincter control.
You'd save on laundry.
by df
