Mall pet store monkey
Pleasing organ melodies

I wouldn

I's go meet him thar.
Mofo better have money.
Else I rob his kicks!

John-boy's holy mole
Judges your vile unbelief.
Walton mountain rules.

Just saw God drive by
Headed to the keg party
Should I confront him?

We a go dub it
And then we a go rock it.
Fock dem Babylon!

Watch what you're saying!
God came to me in a dream.
He stole my half ounce.

Some damn good hydro!
So if anyone sees God,
let me know asap.

God is a sad joke
Played upon stupid people
They just don't get it

Twice in the past week
Opened up my door. Surprise
Pair of nude mormons

Please let me pull it
I am not a nurse but, hey
I am a big guy

Nude acrobatics.
X-Hamster X-men powers.
Genital lawn darts.

A blindfold mounting
from thirty feet up in the air.
All nine inches in.

Brazilian fart girls
blow down card house from ten feet.
A clean hurricane!

They don't shit themselves.
You should learn sphincter control.
You'd save on laundry.

Grandpa

Grandad

It was a close shave
You have never seen my cat
With a growth of beard

Grandad

Grandad

Back flip Back flip fart
Back flip Back flip fart skid mark
Back flip shit my pants

JimBob Walton

JimBob Walton

No one thinks like that.
At least I don't think they do.
Likely a good thing.

I think your work is
a lot like Leonard Cohens
novel attemps but...

I don't think like this
just my hardware is just needing
replacement here

It's not time for God.
God exists outside of time.
It time to party!

Shamone!

Lernu Esperanton
Peti Cunnilingus
Cie en la mondo

'Cause it's been a while
I just tackled the mailman
Dry humped his left leg

Now it's time for GOD.
Fuck your putrefying souls.
Now it's time for GOD.

Esperanto this:
shematoma y tomo.
Je dois tomar plus.

He hematoma
She go hematoma tu
Y yo si tomo

Good one, Starkitten.
Made from Billy Yeast, indeed!
I'd prefer the beer.

Poet Vegemite
Made from William Butler Yea(s)t
Soylent Green Helmet

Alex Trebek's cock
Throbulating. Enormous.
That's Entertainment

In Flight turbulence
Just in the seat next to you
Watch a stranger wank

Gerard Depardieu
Will he pee in a bottle?
Yellow autograph

I'll fly from Asia.
On board hookers and dog stew.
Beats American.

Vegemite have mites.
Funny it's made from old yeast;
no veggies in it.

Personally though,
I'd rather try Soylent Green
made from old poets.

Perfect airline snack.
Crunchy Faux News reporters.
Antifa jerky.

I've arranged it all
John Travolta's your pilot
Forget salt peter

It's a long flight there
You may need some salt peter
To nix in flight wank

Vegemite tampons
Vegemite vampire tea bags
Vegemite vulva

Vegemite be nice
Vegemite be lots of fun
Vegemite get laid

Wipe your ass with toast
Homemade Nutella. Frugal
Save up for hookers

Steve Irwin's old boot
Slowcooked with a dry dung rub
Tended by pygmies

Distended belly
Bring on the dessert, MOFO
Emu cum milkshake

Vegemite surf board
wax and afro sheen helmet
padding substitute.

Vegemite, sunscreen
and birth control blocks semen,
and will feed sea men.

It's from down under
the bottom of the barrel,
left over ale gunk.

Recycled for your
breakfast bread toast enhancement.
Or ball bearing lube.

Shrimp on the Bar-B
Rub vegemite on your balls
Surf with a boner

I think it's time for me to illegally migrate to Australia and putter around with a metal detector looking for gold nuggets until the day I die. Head injuries, spiders, snakes, sharks, surfing, reef cut infections, crocodiles and kangaroo boxing. What more could you ask for. Oh, and drinking. Don't forget drinking.

Antifa is good.
Facism is also good.
Kill all extremists.

I know, it's all wrong.
I'm an extreme moderate.
Seriously though.

Anything that will
decrease the population
has got to be good.

For the long haul, yeah.
I mean, yeah, it sucks, but, well...
there's no other choice.

Do the antifas
target nazis, kkk,
white supremacists?

Or just pussy-assed
faux news media puppets
and T-Rump lovers?

tucker carlson says
hi and i say hi to tucker
posting him here

A bit off topic.
After my hematoma
mosquitoes won't bite.

It's completely weird.
Like they know something is wrong.
They don't like blood clots?

I know, it's crazy.
If we mimic blot clot scent,
skeeter repellent?

I like Graham's crackers.
A cracker eating crackers.
I'm a cannibal!

The novel... just google for it and you can download it from scribd.com

evi1 - a novel about you
that's evi1 spelled with a number 1, not a letter l.

Well.. .okay, her it is:

https://www.scribd.com/document/350140222/evi1-a-novel-about-you

You can read it online. Or log in to download it.

Hematoma shrink!
Make the bulge go to the dink!
Kick it up a notch

I'm pulling a few strings
on top of what else i am pulling
opera is a buggy browser
and of course Graham's Number

Post a link to your evil novel

WEAR A FUCKING HELMET!
Oh shit, that was six syllables.
And that was eight.
And now four!
And now it's not even a haiku any more, goddamnit.
See what you've done!

Seriously, dude.
It was the pigs chasing me.
They love me, you know.

No, not the police.
Pigs meaning farm animals.
Police hate my ass.

Super cunt biscuits.
Queefy puffed delectables.
Get them while they're hot!


In other news:
hematoma has decreased in size quite a bit.
Just got to relax and see how it is after a couple of weeks.
Still feels like a hangover from hell.

Common in older people... brain shrinks w/ age and pulls away from the skull, making this type of injury more common in older people. 10 years ago likely would never have bothered me. Just a minor blow... in fact, I got up and kept on skateboarding after it happened. Only about a week later it got bad. Life.