Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 55 Days and 78008 Haiku later...
Darth's Fart Gallery
"When he has diarrhea
he's Jackson Pollock"
Haiku # 68837 November 19, 2020 2:21 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Under old willow
Note on toilet seat:
"Don't Flush! Getting tape measure.
It's a world record!"
Haiku # 68836 November 19, 2020 2:13 am ET
by Okay, go ahead and peek.
Darth of the Three Dinks
I'll call you Triskelion
Where do you buy pants?
Haiku # 68835 November 19, 2020 2:10 am ET
by Drunk of Barstool
Jello Wrestling.
Biden and Trump butt-naked.
Live stream on PornHub.
Haiku # 68834 November 19, 2020 2:09 am ET
by Praise Jesus!
You left the lid up
That's why I filed for divorce
So tired of your shit
Haiku # 68833 November 19, 2020 2:06 am ET
by Pissed of Off
there is a bottom
he's the man-child at the top
a great orange arse
Haiku # 68832 November 18, 2020 11:57 pm ET
by ash of republican reviews
So you guys are worried about the next face that our problems is going to disguise itself as rather than the problems themselves.

Go out and buy guns.
That's the only solution.
You will thank me soon.

I know more than you.
Listen to the old-timers.
Can't keep their mouths shut.
Haiku # 68831 November 18, 2020 11:21 pm ET
by It's coming soon!
You ever wonder...
Do Eskimoes bang cave bears?
Hibernation rape.
Haiku # 68830 November 18, 2020 6:42 pm ET
by Saves on roofies. of You'll never watch Bernstein Bears or Bare Bears w/o thinking of me. In you it.
Hey look, could be worse.
What if I were president?
Call me Darth Nuke-em!

Reset the clock back
to the stone age and we'll all
use spears and stone tools.

And be mutated.
But that's like half the fun, yeah?
Check out my three schlongs.
Haiku # 68829 November 18, 2020 6:36 pm ET
by President Darth Whorendous of Vice President Pee Wee Herman
Flush that clogger down
Good riddance, foul orange clown
Joe's coming to town
Haiku # 68828 November 18, 2020 5:13 pm ET
by U. R. Evicted of Haiku Central
Are you on crack man?
C'mon man- you voted for Joe?
How damn dumb was that?
Haiku # 68827 November 18, 2020 2:54 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
President Harris
Say it with me sad lofan....
President Harris

Inmate Donald tRump
Say it with me sad lofan
Inmate Donald tRump
Haiku # 68826 November 18, 2020 2:54 pm ET
by Jesus loves me but not you
Sometimes I wonder
How dumb republicans are
There is no bottom
Haiku # 68825 November 18, 2020 2:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Magic man in sky
Will save us from the science
We don't understand
Haiku # 68824 November 18, 2020 2:39 pm ET
by Retarded christian
Seventy one million votes
For President Trump
Not one city destroyed

What does that tell you
Democrat destroyer dolts?
You won but- you lost.

In less than one year
Joe Bribe'um will give
The rule of America

To Komodo Harris
Then you will holler real loud
Damn! what have I done?!
Haiku # 68823 November 18, 2020 2:37 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
The young Staruck's girl
With a fine outstanding body
and a lovely face

Was glad to see me
Until Gavin Guv. Gruesome
Shut down the seating.

The Bolshevik fop
makes rules for the poor Kulaks
at the French Laundry.

Democrat Bastard
typical hypocrite clown
like all of your clan.
Haiku # 68822 November 18, 2020 2:14 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Stop the steal? Really?
Bunch of whining deniers
More like stop the squeal
Haiku # 68821 November 18, 2020 11:27 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
One haiku, three lies.
Well done fascist footlocker
I hope you catch it.
Haiku # 68820 November 18, 2020 11:24 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Glorified chest cold.
Red Chinee lab-made virus:
Globalist's wet-dream.
Haiku # 68819 November 18, 2020 9:48 am ET
by Doctor Fauci of Self-Contradicting Nonsense
We are Covid Kids.
4 million strong, and growing.
That's active cases.
Haiku # 68818 November 18, 2020 7:26 am ET
by It's a conspiracy of piracy. of They done stole the vote!
You should not be here.
Please go get your Trump Won sign.
Join the protests now.
Haiku # 68817 November 17, 2020 11:08 pm ET
by MAGA-natism of Stop the Steal
Control the virus
Who will make all the dildos
if China goes down?

Let's measure it, Darth
Contraption from old shoe store
Feels good and accurate
Haiku # 68816 November 17, 2020 9:37 pm ET
by Holder of the slidey thing of On bended knees
I find it interesting how some states in the US have a lingering "active covid" cases and others seem to have "instant recovery".

The lack of consistent reporting of cases and inaccuracy of data leads to poor decision making for those in charge of handling the crisis.

My penis is a bit on the small size, but still I'd really like a blowjob after my morning coffee b/c I'm fresh out of guinea pigs to rape.

Will the virus mutate over the winter into a more lasting and dangerous strain? We can only pray that it will. Therefore the US will be vulnerable to military invasion and China will take over, ending the era of the "free world" and we will all be communists.

You can blame Donald Trump, but his penis is smaller than mine and that's why I voted for him. So it's okay.
Haiku # 68815 November 17, 2020 8:49 pm ET
by Well bugger me in a phone booth, if it isn't Clark Kent! of My kryptonite is cheese.
to be honest i
don't give a shit about that
guy on here's thingy

twitter is worse by a light year
Haiku # 68814 November 17, 2020 8:48 pm ET
by vhs of used to DW
Fig leaf malfunction
Garden of Eden tent pole
Now here comes the snake
Haiku # 68813 November 17, 2020 8:47 pm ET
by E. Vaporated of Condensed Canned Bibles
No, I have not pooped.
Next you'll say I'm full of shit.
A double meaning.

Either way, you're right.
My God, you are so clever.
How do you do that?
Haiku # 68812 November 17, 2020 8:18 pm ET
by dw
An overdue patch
Is better late than never
But oh, so, so late
Haiku # 68811 November 17, 2020 7:38 pm ET
by Adam
Say, Darth, my good man
It's kind of personal but
Did you poop today?
Haiku # 68810 November 17, 2020 5:47 pm ET
by #2 Curious of 2-ply world
There are good people
Since God created mankind.
(But not the Marxists)
Haiku # 68809 November 17, 2020 5:29 pm ET
by Signifying Monkey of HAIKU
I must write something.
I only have a minute.
Oh, shit, now it's gone.
Haiku # 68808 November 17, 2020 5:27 pm ET
by dw
Fish are assholes too
"I can breathe in the water!"
Arrogant fuckers
Haiku # 68807 November 17, 2020 5:22 pm ET
by Gamey Warden
There aren't good people.
Since the first ape walked upright.
Since fish first breathed air.
Haiku # 68806 November 17, 2020 7:06 am ET
by blahblah
torch that jazz lettuce
then suck like a hoover, but...
don't be a bogart
Haiku # 68805 November 17, 2020 6:03 am ET
by ash
set up us the don
all your white house are belong
no chance to survive
Haiku # 68804 November 17, 2020 6:00 am ET
by ash of the west (zero) wing
Now someone chimes in
"There's still good people out there."
I could write this script
Haiku # 68803 November 17, 2020 1:07 am ET
by Drunk of Barstool
Paying it forward
with random acts of blow jobs
in the Starbucks line
Haiku # 68802 November 17, 2020 12:57 am ET
by Caffeinated of Starbucks
Have you lost all faith..
In God and humanity?
You are not alone.
Haiku # 68801 November 16, 2020 8:23 pm ET
by Darth Whorendous
Sativa fire gold
Watermelon gelato
The devil's lettuce
Haiku # 68800 November 16, 2020 1:08 am ET
by High AF of Pacific Northwest
What you smokin', man?
Indica or Sativa.
Sativa's my friend.
Haiku # 68799 November 15, 2020 11:33 pm ET
by Oregon bound.
Panic Room fogged up
Combinations of your farts
and this big phat spliff
Haiku # 68798 November 15, 2020 9:33 pm ET
by Allsmoke of High As Fuck
I enslave my sin.
It does not enslave me.
Except on weekends.
Haiku # 68797 November 15, 2020 8:38 pm ET
by Darth Whorendous
Huh huh, you said "fart".
Fart oo much. I heard it, dude.
Wanna hear me fart?
Haiku # 68796 November 15, 2020 8:31 pm ET
by Me farts you think too much.
Methinks thou dost talk
far too much.Thou art surely
enslaved to thy sin.
Haiku # 68795 November 15, 2020 7:45 pm ET
by King James of 1611
I enjoy saying highly inappropriate things to get an angry response.
I enjoy watching enemies suffer and often go to lengths to make sure that it happens.
I fart a lot.
I like an occassional beer or two, mushrooms, marijuana, once in a blue moon, LSD. But I get pissed at drunks and those who take drugs way too much.
Hmmm... Maybe I'm just a grumpy old fart. Is that a mental condition?
Fuck it, time for morning exercise.
Haiku # 68794 November 15, 2020 7:15 pm ET
by blahblahblah of I sure would like to have a name to attach to my disorder. Misanthropic platypus analizer. Sounds good.
I don't suffer from
insanity due to the
fact I enjoy it.
Haiku # 68793 November 15, 2020 7:07 pm ET
by dw. Is the fear of having a mental disorder a mental disorder?
It's highly likely
that Darth Whorrendous has a
MENTAL DISORDER.
Haiku # 68792 November 15, 2020 6:03 pm ET
by Science is Unreal of Fake Therapy
it's highly likely
those alien anal probes
aren't scientific
Haiku # 68791 November 15, 2020 7:38 am ET
by ash
viagra shoppers
don't buy those fake boner pills
you know you'll get stiffed
Haiku # 68790 November 15, 2020 7:33 am ET
by ash
petulant pissant
the puckering president
doing fishy lips
Haiku # 68787 November 15, 2020 4:14 am ET
by ash
Oh, I had a boner
I steered the Uber with it
They call you Smalldink?
Haiku # 68786 November 15, 2020 4:03 am ET
by Alien Uber of GPS ( Genitalia Performs Steering)
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