Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 182 Days and 70640 Haikus later...

C'mon Darth get real
I know how small your feet are
How big your mouth is
Haiku # 67900, August 25, 2020 4:51 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Close by
It would probably
take millions of sea horses'
cum to fill a shoe.

I know because I've
sucked off many sea horses.
I needed the cash.
Haiku # 67899, August 25, 2020 2:07 pm ET
by Addicted to sea weed.
Hamster testicles.
That's what corona looks like.
Don't ask how I know.
Haiku # 67898, August 25, 2020 12:13 am ET
by RodentPorn.com of It's cheesy.
The Great Pyramid
And wouldn't it be my luck
Stepped in camel dung
Haiku # 67897, August 24, 2020 9:21 pm ET
by Chillaxtopher Walken of Under old willow
The ejaculate
of a thousand seahorses
May it fill your shoe
Haiku # 67896, August 24, 2020 7:59 pm ET
by Cock Justblow of At sea
Before Donald Trump
I never had the nut gas...
Except that one time.

You know that business
on Cato Neimoidia,
that... that doesn't count.
Haiku # 67895, August 24, 2020 1:50 pm ET
by What happens on Cato Neimoidia stays on Cato Neimoidia.
A pussy will-o,
better than pussy won't-o.
Am I right or what?
Haiku # 67894, August 24, 2020 1:42 pm ET
by Truth!
I just wish someone
would call Darth to come over
and foul the waters . . .
Haiku # 67893, August 24, 2020 8:39 am ET
by Limpid Pools of Orientalism
And by the way, Darth
Thanks for using the word DINK
A true gentleman
Haiku # 67892, August 24, 2020 1:28 am ET
by Lady of Pussy Willow
That sunken shipwreck
I just used your bathroom, bud
Bowel Torpedo
Haiku # 67891, August 23, 2020 10:49 pm ET
by Gorgon Leadfoot of Nearest Exit
The Funyun Ringtoss
I knew you were a fun guy
Dink like a toadstool
Haiku # 67890, August 23, 2020 9:53 pm ET
by cheech and schlong of Dink rink
It smells like pot smoke.
My dink gets high without me.
And my stash is gone.
Haiku # 67889, August 23, 2020 6:27 pm ET
by I feel so rejected. of But can you blame it.
A gassy penis.
Testicular fartitute.
You thought queefs were weird?!
Haiku # 67888, August 23, 2020 6:23 pm ET
by Why am I doing this? of Haiku are so stupid.
Long shlong strong dong song.
King-kong Hong Kong wrong wrong wrong!
Bong throng thong tong GONG!
Haiku # 67887, August 23, 2020 6:15 pm ET
by Haiku @ The Gong Show. of Don't you hate the way the haiku sometimes run into the "name and location" field?!
You do sudoku?
Brew true kangaroo poo stew.
Zoo hullaballoo.
Haiku # 67886, August 23, 2020 6:05 pm ET
by Boo-boo and Yogi Bear of Bears are not robots.
I used Elmer's glue.
The kind that kids use at school.
'Cause it's non-toxic.
Haiku # 67885, August 23, 2020 10:13 am ET
by We don't want any dead koala bears on our hands now do we. of Eucalyptus?! You can lick this!
Asking for a friend
What did you use for the glue?
You could make your own
Haiku # 67884, August 23, 2020 5:17 am ET
by construction guy of hanging from helmet in comnercial
I glued on the eyes.
They fell off when I got hard.
She was not impressed.
Haiku # 67883, August 23, 2020 2:28 am ET
by Darth Whorrendous and his koala bear sidekick.
Balloon animals
Wrap it in sour gummy worms
Good bang for your buck
Haiku # 67882, August 22, 2020 11:42 pm ET
by Exhibitionists of Dollar Store
Looking down your pants
A little too familiar
Try these googly eyes
Haiku # 67881, August 22, 2020 11:39 pm ET
by of Make it fun
Can I poop on you?
I'll give you fifty dollars.
I love you so much.
Haiku # 67880, August 22, 2020 9:50 pm ET
by Elmo visits Grouchland
I need a fucking drink.
That last line had six syllables.
That one had eight.
And I still need a drink.
Haiku # 67879, August 22, 2020 9:14 pm ET
by Maybe 2 bottle of the Tussin DM of dextromethorphan dungeon master
I smoked peanut skins
Did nothing, gave me bad breath
Complete waste of time
Haiku # 67878, August 22, 2020 8:59 pm ET
by At least it wasn't penis skins
Smoking bananas.
That's one thing I've never tried.
How about you, sir?
Haiku # 67877, August 22, 2020 8:47 pm ET
by Anything for a buzz.
Snorting snail slime.
Dehydrated and powdered.
Frightening visions.
Haiku # 67876, August 22, 2020 4:07 pm ET
by Ready yourself to be in the same mental state of Darth Whorrendous.
All Nude Aged Meat Fest
Wonka and Walton elders
Now that's an orgy
Haiku # 67875, August 22, 2020 3:54 am ET
by Cocoon of Wrinkled Junque of They took out their dentures
You are Grinch, Grinch, GRINCH !!
Flame-ass dribblers of bad worse:
You are brat-Wurstest.
Haiku # 67874, August 21, 2020 5:32 pm ET
by Read the books "Damned" and "Doomed" of Chuck Palahniuk. He also wrote Fight Club
You are cringe, cringe, CRINGE !
Lame-ass scribblers of bad verse:
you are the Greatest.
Haiku # 67873, August 21, 2020 5:08 pm ET
by Pathetic Poets of Doomed and Damned
the end of times soon
because all things must finish
like this brief haiku
Haiku # 67872, August 21, 2020 9:30 am ET
by ash
God hates all poets.
Their creations are nearly
as wretched as His.
Haiku # 67871, August 21, 2020 6:33 am ET
by
Under disco-lights
I reassess existence:
over-rated noise.
Haiku # 67870, August 20, 2020 9:56 pm ET
by Jacket Lapels of of Perfect Nostalgia
Hey, why the long face?
Flaming syllable shooters
Vomiting poems
Haiku # 67869, August 20, 2020 1:53 pm ET
by Drunk of Barstool
a haiku reflects
on walking into a bar
gazing in a glass
Haiku # 67868, August 20, 2020 3:20 am ET
by ash
The Husband Landfill
Salvageable parts removed
Pre-owned dildo sales
Haiku # 67867, August 19, 2020 7:29 pm ET
by Unnoticed Poet of Undisclosed
I want some breakfast.
Twat waffles and cunt biscuits.
A pot of coffee.
Haiku # 67866, August 19, 2020 4:53 pm ET
by What does Pink Floyd know anyway?! of Fuck marmalade!
Light the hibachi
Soon as I gut this possum
We'll have cheeseboigers
Haiku # 67865, August 19, 2020 4:25 pm ET
by Paste Eater of State Park
Clear the area.
This haiku zone is declared
Prohibited verse.
Haiku # 67864, August 19, 2020 10:54 am ET
by Robo-cop of National Guard of Poetry
Pussy-ass bitches!
Come get some of this you pigs.
Phuq da POlice, y'all
Haiku # 67863, August 19, 2020 10:50 am ET
by The Dastardly Villain of Portland, Oregoing Going Gone
Now stand back, you cad.
You've made this young lady cry.
I shall deal with you.
Haiku # 67862, August 19, 2020 10:46 am ET
by The Hero of Royal Canadian Mounties
Oh you are so VILE.
Oh you horrible man, you.
Why, oh WHY must you?
Haiku # 67861, August 19, 2020 10:43 am ET
by Virgin Milkmaid of Sobbing in her Petticoats
here's to you missus
robinson, heaven holds a
place for those who spray
Haiku # 67860, August 19, 2020 9:46 am ET
by benjamin's boner
Mrs. Livingston
Courtship of Eddie's Father
Your penis Is green!
Haiku # 67859, August 19, 2020 8:39 am ET
by Jumper of Golden Gate Bridge
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/shirokoformatnaya-pechat
http://www.grandprint.su http://www.grandprint.su
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/pechat-bannerov
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/pechat-na-plenke
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/pechat-na-oboyah
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/shirokoformatnaya-pechat
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/pechat-bannerov
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/press-wall
https://www.alemprint.ru/uslugi/pechat-na-setke
Haiku # 67858, August 19, 2020 7:48 am ET
by Williamtar of Cuba
Vaseline in bulk
Now see what you made me do
Bend over, poets
Haiku # 67857, August 19, 2020 5:53 am ET
by Quivering Asshole of Back door
Nasal Relations
Deviated septum jizz
Go ahead and blow
Haiku # 67856, August 19, 2020 3:31 am ET
by Posh Puff of Behind binoculars (nosy)
I'll spank your monkey.
And you can choke my chicken.
Just like Darth Vader.

You have to wonder if Darth Vader ever force choked himself while masturbating. You know you'd do it too if you could use The Force.

Time for a massage.
Of course with all the extras.
I hope that she's tight.

I might bang her nose.
It's possible over here.
Covid lubricant.
Haiku # 67855, August 18, 2020 8:28 pm ET
by dw
Hey organ grinder
I'll show you my banana
Show me your monkey
Haiku # 67854, August 18, 2020 1:50 pm ET
by Jizzumberto of Italy
in this brave new world
narcotics are out of vogue
it hurts me to say
Haiku # 67853, August 18, 2020 9:41 am ET
by ash
What did the haiku say
to the gross limerick?
Le' me rick your barrs.

Of course that last line's
said with Japanese accent
while making squint eyes.
Haiku # 67852, August 18, 2020 9:34 am ET
by dw
Piss off the office.
Replace the coffee with tea.
It's way worse than pea.
Haiku # 67851, August 18, 2020 6:34 am ET
by It's better to be pissed off than pissed on. Or in. of Why did the condom fly across the room? It was pissed off.
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