Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 248 Days and 77180 Haiku later...

mhmm, maybe i
will just get r absent minded
one day and not care
Haiku # 67440, April 30, 2020 10:54 pm ET
by vhs
The time of Man, done.
Endless ages of Haiku
shall roll on, brothers.
Haiku # 67439, April 30, 2020 1:37 pm ET
by Shining Beams from Heavens of Haiku
Buddha will not save.
Nor your gods. Nor Your idols.
Haiku shall judge you.
Haiku # 67438, April 30, 2020 1:27 pm ET
by Raised Flashing Blade of Haiku
And then, as they flee,
Slay them all without mercy
until Haiku reigns.
Haiku # 67437, April 30, 2020 1:20 pm ET
by Genocide of Haiku-based Compassion
After the signal,
Trap them within the Haiku
Then set fire to it.
Haiku # 67436, April 30, 2020 1:18 pm ET
by Seven Samurai of Bad Haiku
Time is short, brothers.
Haiku cries out for REVENGE.
The blade thirsts for blood.
Haiku # 67435, April 30, 2020 1:14 pm ET
by Victims of Haiku Massacre
My haiku brethren;
Do not quarrel over it.
Unite and SLAY them.
Haiku # 67434, April 30, 2020 1:07 pm ET
by Militant Haiku of Blood Vengeance
I think I must leave.
So that vhs will not.
He wants me to die.
Haiku # 67433, April 30, 2020 12:30 pm ET
by dw of Maybe he is right.
mister president
beware covfefe nineteen
it's fake novelty
Haiku # 67432, April 30, 2020 2:08 am ET
by ash
strange reactions just
keep reacting to the place
till i finally
Haiku # 67431, April 29, 2020 7:09 pm ET
by vhs
"Befrazzled": strange word.
Using this term makes you sound
very befrazzled.
Haiku # 67430, April 29, 2020 2:18 pm ET
by Don't Worry Be Frazzled
well if i am too
befrazzled i might decide
to leave here for good!
Haiku # 67429, April 29, 2020 2:10 pm ET
by vhs
Is your penis small?
Then why so competitive?
Just enjoy your life.
Haiku # 67428, April 29, 2020 6:35 am ET
by Eccentrica Gallumbits
Ima smoke yo' ass!
What I said to a half ounce.
Damn was I stupid.
Haiku # 67427, April 29, 2020 6:33 am ET
by Darth Whorendous
I'ma SMOKE yo ass.
Y'all caint even WRITE haiku.
DAMN. Weak-ass poets...
Haiku # 67426, April 29, 2020 5:13 am ET
by Anonymous Tyrone of Literary Endeavor
somehow it became
one of those bumper sticker
posting contests here
Haiku # 67425, April 28, 2020 6:17 pm ET
by vhs
tis a bit behind
the screen, the scenes, big deal we
are in trouble now
Haiku # 67424, April 28, 2020 3:53 pm ET
by vhs
Is this a contest
To see who is the dumbest?
You all are winning!
Haiku # 67423, April 28, 2020 11:05 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
You all are stupid
Stay safe come at me
I'd kick your weak ass
Haiku # 67422, April 28, 2020 11:03 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
whos a nazi, whos a
soup nazi, get back in line!
no soup for you, nein
Haiku # 67421, April 27, 2020 4:45 pm ET
by vhs
Darth LOVES Melania.
He sent her a Balut egg
for this year's present.
Haiku # 67420, April 27, 2020 1:17 pm ET
by Secret Admirer of Melania Trump
Dear Melania:
Have a wonderful birthday.
Don't believe Fake News.
Haiku # 67419, April 27, 2020 11:57 am ET
by Czech our First Lady out
After the lockdown
if anyone says "Stay safe,"
I will punch their face!
Haiku # 67418, April 27, 2020 12:04 am ET
by dw of Promise!
The coronoa cure.
Jesus and boofing Clorox.
Salvation and safe.
Haiku # 67417, April 26, 2020 8:27 pm ET
by dw of Prescribed by Dr. Donald Trump
So are you asking
if she knew you biblically
Or what, exactly...

Or perhaps you mean
Until she met you she was
Not a Hockey "Mom" (?)
Haiku # 67416, April 26, 2020 5:45 pm ET
by Hockey Mom Support of Downeast
i wonder if i
know a certain hockey mom
that knew me sometime
Haiku # 67415, April 25, 2020 10:28 pm ET
by vhs
i decided to
check my feed to see what new
posts were on
Haiku # 67414, April 25, 2020 9:07 pm ET
by vhs
oh my maine on maine
quite insane, I'm paranoid
so what's new there now?
Haiku # 67413, April 25, 2020 8:58 pm ET
by vhs
I am back again
after being busy with
life outside haiku
Haiku # 67412, April 25, 2020 7:36 am ET
by Oedipa of not the same town as vhs
Stupid President
Wants us to inject Lysol
He was NOT joking
Haiku # 67411, April 25, 2020 6:57 am ET
by Stupid is as stupid does.....
I'm turning into
a redneck according to
certain, um, thingies

(the pronoun usually is "they"
but there is only one of them)
Haiku # 67410, April 24, 2020 2:47 pm ET
by vhs
I smelled the hatpussy
beast on tinder, her hat smells
like her pussy, but worse.
Haiku # 67409, April 24, 2020 2:40 am ET
i saw the pussyhat
beast on twitter, smug face of
a movement constipated
Haiku # 67408, April 23, 2020 7:57 pm ET
by vhs
this is a post modern
haiku which means it's just
the same as the last
Haiku # 67407, April 23, 2020 6:30 pm ET
by vhs
And now, at long last
I write the Final Haiku.
Thus ends the verse form.
Haiku # 67406, April 23, 2020 2:57 pm ET
by After Me, the Deluge of wink wink
boredom means what then
does life suck then you get less
bored, are they boring?
Haiku # 67405, April 23, 2020 2:23 pm ET
by vhs
adrenochrome, soy
soylent green? soyboys? mass
censorship, nothing to see
Haiku # 67404, April 23, 2020 12:56 pm ET
by vhs
What are you saying?
Slim Jim's is made of people?
I did not know that
Haiku # 67403, April 23, 2020 12:00 pm ET
by Professor Poopypants
ironic, i have known
you for years and it is as
i have
Haiku # 67402, April 23, 2020 10:19 am ET
by vhs
i went to bed, and
had an issue on twitter
with someone i should forget
Haiku # 67401, April 23, 2020 10:18 am ET
by vhs
Why aren't you writing?
I need to know your alive.
And not cannibalized by mutant redneck neighbors kind of like in The Hill Have Eyes.

2000 ppl per day... Christ have mercy.
That's a lot of Slim Jim extra spicy sausage stix.
Haiku # 67400, April 23, 2020 3:51 am ET
by dw of Anyone care for a bit of Soylent Green. Don't ask how, but I got some extra rations this week.
King Tut's butt
and the sphinx's sphincter
split open by Isis's strap-on.

Isis being the goddess,
Not the terrorist organization.
Hmmm.... However...
Haiku # 67399, April 23, 2020 3:46 am ET
by dw of I stopped counting... oooooo what a rebel I am!
Mars is beautiful.
That's because no one lives there.
And no one dies there.
Haiku # 67398, April 23, 2020 3:44 am ET
by dw of Hey look! A rock!
It's an ugly world.
I could have done much better.
Can we impeach God?
Haiku # 67397, April 23, 2020 3:07 am ET
by dw of I'm serious!
mood swings back and forth
madness of crowds go home now
ran out of witches
Haiku # 67396, April 22, 2020 2:21 pm ET
by vhs
Darth went to Egypt
to see all the ancient sights.
He saw the Sphincter.
Haiku # 67395, April 22, 2020 10:57 am ET
by Hanging Out of Egypt
The preacher told them
Ignore science, come to church
Now....preacher is dead
Haiku # 67394, April 22, 2020 6:49 am ET
by This really happened of Karma is a bitch
Nanny-state told them:
"Virus! Be scared and helpless"
Like sheep, they obeyed.
Haiku # 67393, April 22, 2020 3:48 am ET
by Nanny Nanny Boo-Boo of Abusive Mother
Lockdown Diary:
Day number ... 50? 60?
I haven't a clue
Haiku # 67392, April 21, 2020 8:36 pm ET
by Getting tired of being stuck indoors
My Dick was so big
That they tried to impeach him.
But then he resigned.
Haiku # 67391, April 21, 2020 3:09 pm ET
by Pat Nixon of 1970's
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