ironic, i have known
you for years and it is as
i have foreseen...wow
by vhs
i went to bed, and
had an issue on twitter
with someone i should forget
by vhs
Why aren't you writing?
I need to know your alive.
And not cannibalized by mutant redneck neighbors kind of like in The Hill Have Eyes.
2000 ppl per day... Christ have mercy.
That's a lot of Slim Jim extra spicy sausage stix.
by dw of Anyone care for a bit of Soylent Green. Don't ask how, but I got some extra rations this week.
King Tut's butt
and the sphinx's sphincter
split open by Isis's strap-on.
Isis being the goddess,
Not the terrorist organization.
Hmmm.... However...
by dw of I stopped counting... oooooo what a rebel I am!
Mars is beautiful.
That's because no one lives there.
And no one dies there.
by dw of Hey look! A rock!
It's an ugly world.
I could have done much better.
Can we impeach God?
by dw of I'm serious!
mood swings back and forth
madness of crowds go home now
ran out of witches
by vhs
Darth went to Egypt
to see all the ancient sights.
He saw the Sphincter.
by Hanging Out of Egypt
The preacher told them
Ignore science, come to church
Now....preacher is dead
by This really happened of Karma is a bitch
Nanny-state told them:
"Virus! Be scared and helpless"
Like sheep, they obeyed.
by Nanny Nanny Boo-Boo of Abusive Mother
Lockdown Diary:
Day number ... 50? 60?
I haven't a clue
by Getting tired of being stuck indoors
My Dick was so big
That they tried to impeach him.
But then he resigned.
by Pat Nixon of 1970's
my dick is small so
since i dont care about that leme tell you how small
by vhs
When your dick is small:
"My yacht's bigger than your yacht."
Always gotta prove.
You know you're old when
your sphincter hangs down below
the tip of your cock.
Can't you just smell it.
Close your eyes and imagine.
Psychic scent transfered.
by dw of geriatric physician's office.
how about i sink
your yacht, wwg1wga
enemy combatant
by vhs
Hey, I like your style...
Fancy a trip on my yacht?
Feed you to the sharks
by Operations Manager of Scandinavia
Waiting for the worms.
That is how I feel right now.
Covid will kill me.
How's irrelevant.
By pneumonia or boredom.
Which one will be worse?
by Darth Whorrendous, The Dork Lard of the Fifth of Rum of Going to find a whore today. Going to fuck her 3 hours straight. I hope she has a bad cough.
listen if you shag
a tree or a apple pie
splinters or burn...
And i thought it was creepy
of the guy in American Beauty
by vhs
well i don't know why
people make a big deal on
bills but they're just there
by vhs of hillarys bill wasn't that big :).
Tiny fucked a stump.
You don't know who Tiny is?
Well aren't you special.
by dw
You can't cure stupid
And you can't quarantine it
God bless 'merica
by Anonymous Poet
I know my poultry.
There ain't no chicken in hell
will cluck otherwise.
by Poultry-Based Market Optimization
You know your poultry
'Cause yo brain is chicken shit
Step off there Chester
by Anonymous Poet
It's all about ME
inventing endless genders.
How DARE you. For shame.
by Fat Sullen Pale Short Haired Purple Thing With Glasses and a Lawyer from ACLU
Romance languages
Have masculine/feminine
Grammar. They must go.
by Genderfluidity Must Be Promoted At Grammar School At
All poultry has rights.
Chicken Lives Matter: RISE UP!
Stop laying their eggs.
by Poultry Activism of Woke Haiku
My preferred pronoun:
(Use it or I press charges)
"Cluck-cluck-cluck-ba-KACK"
by Barnyard Bullying of Genderfluid Fox in Henhouse
Granny has a cock:
What pronoun must we use when
Grandpa has a hen?
by Poetic Poultry of Tyson Money-Laundering
at least it's not meth
perhaps a new haiku meme
grandma has a cock
by ash
My contribution.
My undying legacy.
"At least it's not meth."
by dw
try fecal transplants
i promise you, it's the shit!
(at least it's not meth)
by scotch of scatology
marketing slogan:
tired of the same old shit?
try fecal transplants!
by scotch of but maintain social distancing
So you think I should
get a fecal transplant to
fix my excrement.
Please be the donor.
I want feces just like yours.
Your shit doesnt' stink.
by Darth Whorrendouns, Dork Lard of the Fifth (of Rum) of Hell's got nothing on where I am now.
that's ok...sometimes we
need the Darwin Awards for
the human lemmings
by vhs
Corona thanks to
Chinese Communist Party...
But lemmings don't know.
by A World of Dead Lemmings
One World of Haiku:
Let us all sing Kumbaya
and hate on Donald.
by Virtue-Signalers of Burning Hell
A new haiku born:
Dork Lard is mentally ill
(Excrementally)
by Evaluation of Excremental Health
i am attempting
to get people to come here and
post some haikus.
by vhs
oh darkwing duck let's
get dangerous, suck gas you
evil doers, poit!
by vhs of better watch out you bad boys
New name. Let me guess:
It is now "Darth Whorrendous"
Did I get it right?
by Divine Workshop of Dirty Water
I don't write every poem on here, you know... I didn't say anything about quitting. Hang on until the end, old friend.
And I'm not a figpucker any more, so it's dw.
Separated!... Which makes me think maybe there is a God that cares. In some weird, twisted way. ;-)
Given the way this last year has turned out, I am 100% convinced that God has a FAR more warped sense of humor than I do. You win, God! You hear me! You beat me hand down! I cannot even imagine shit like that! You are the Master!
by dw
It's a cross between
the Sand People and Jawas.
You're a Star Wars fan!
by Darth Whorrendous, Dork Lard of the Fifth (of Rum) of Let's BBQ some Sand Jawas. Juicy and nutritious!
Those SJWS:
REND THEIR FOUL LIMBS ASUNDER.
Burn their Maoist texts.
by But Love Them as Yourself of course . . .
i wish i could quit
df, but i seek revenge
on those sjws
by Anonymous Poet
Oh ye heavens! Lord
Have mercy upon this land
For such bad poems.
by Current Crisis of Poetry
i have thought of say
i wish the internet would
go away for a bit
by vhs
If you were to leave,
We would weep and then vomit
Pure haiku sorrow.
by Until the Next Haiku
hmm, if i left the
website like i want to leave
twitter whats next then
by vhs
This is terrible.
I'm running out of puppies.
Didn't think it through.
by dw, the fartist formerly known as df
Abandon all hope!
Your puppies belong to me!
Purina cat chow!
I play puppy skeet.
Launch them with a puppypult.
Blast with a 4-gauge.
A puppypult is
a catapult that launches
puppies and not cats.
I play this game in
international waters.
Your laws can't touch me.
by Darth Whorrendous, The Dork Lard of the Fifth (of rum) so powerful you'll nevrer forget his stench. of My yacht in the Florida Keys, with prostytoots and 2 year supply of food, water, alcohol, and drugs. Seriously!
