Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 315 Days and 72149 Haikus later...

Drinking molasses
in the town of Manassas;
quite large my ass is.
Haiku # 66621, December 26, 2019 5:27 pm ET
by Darth Rhino Raper of Back from my African safari with the last of at least 10 extinct animals to hang on my wall.
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Haiku # 66620, December 26, 2019 10:17 am ET
by kittyCip of Russia
Bots try to join in
But they have no Christmas cheer
Their haiku is cold
Haiku # 66619, December 25, 2019 10:32 pm ET
by Spot the Bot
Soon, everything
Will make perfect sense: until
Then please stop screaming
Haiku # 66618, December 25, 2019 12:33 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Bad Haiku: a sheer
Coincidence? I think not
No time to explain
Haiku # 66617, December 25, 2019 12:30 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Your opinion counts
Even when you appear to
A large ash pile
Haiku # 66616, December 25, 2019 12:26 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
I'm on the staircase
Takes me where I need to go
I become: staircase
Haiku # 66615, December 25, 2019 12:23 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Submissive haikus
A most poetic fetish
Begging to be read
Haiku # 66614, December 25, 2019 12:21 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Time to spend money
Things you need and don't need, too
Nonchalant humans
Haiku # 66613, December 25, 2019 12:20 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
She turned into scarves
Made of red disappointment
Ate my eyeballs, too
Haiku # 66612, December 25, 2019 12:18 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
NSA program
Zombie chicken speaking French
$12 billion
Haiku # 66611, December 25, 2019 12:17 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Confusing steamboat
Stubborn children levitate
1892
Haiku # 66610, December 25, 2019 12:15 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
Three hot sauce nightmares
Mountains of mice exploded
Aggravating shoes
Haiku # 66609, December 25, 2019 12:13 am ET
by Mr. Staircase
in this case i note
the cynicism that i
left behind behind...
Haiku # 66608, December 24, 2019 8:51 pm ET
by vhs
Satan and Santa
They were buddies back in school
Each took his own path
Haiku # 66607, December 24, 2019 11:31 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
God, I hate Christmas.
The man who invented it
should be crucified.
Haiku # 66606, December 24, 2019 11:21 am ET
by DRR of oldie but a baddie.
Christmas without Christ
The religion of shopping
SInners fake goodwill
Haiku # 66605, December 23, 2019 1:23 pm ET
by Consumerism of the Masses
fatty christmas roast
it's not santa gertrudis
ho ho ho right in
Haiku # 66604, December 23, 2019 8:38 am ET
by ash
Xmas wish list mandatory party punch reindeer venison St. Nick joined Zumba (C) workshop Krampus did your wife in a cheap hotel. How could you not know?
Haiku # 66603, December 22, 2019 10:13 pm ET
by DRR
Imitate Jolie:
Proactive masectomy;
Stay abreast of things.
Haiku # 66602, December 22, 2019 1:07 pm ET
by Hollyweird Knows What's Up
CO2 levels
Damn dinosaurs and their cars
How fucking DARE you
Haiku # 66601, December 21, 2019 11:29 am ET
by Gretasaurus Thunbergius of Pangaea
what if we could be
like angelina jolly ?
'tis the season too
Haiku # 66600, December 21, 2019 6:53 am ET
by ash
the planet is hot
it's a capitalist plot
but greta is not

agreeing with this
because something is amiss
stop taking the piss

fiddle while we burn
because there's nothing to learn
from the taciturn
Haiku # 66599, December 21, 2019 6:47 am ET
by ash of burning bush
I wait for haiku.
But you don't write anything.
So go hang yourself.
Haiku # 66598, December 20, 2019 10:12 pm ET
by Poetes Maudits of Gender-based Languages
my hipster lament
reading email in cafe
coffee is now cold
Haiku # 66597, December 20, 2019 2:32 pm ET
by studboy of Los Angeles, CA
Christmas carols, joy,
The divine light of Jesus...
now shut up and BUY.
Haiku # 66596, December 19, 2019 7:30 am ET
by Guy from holiday car commercial
Now, back to Greta:
Shame on you. Oh, how DARE you
make that nasty face.
Haiku # 66595, December 18, 2019 9:43 pm ET
by The Sky is Falling of Chicken Little
Eh, don't call me that.
Even you are mocking me
And abusing, eh.
Haiku # 66594, December 18, 2019 8:16 pm ET
by Kunta Kinte of White Privilege
After meating you
I would like to eating you.
Signed: nerdy tech guy.
Haiku # 66593, December 18, 2019 8:13 pm ET
by German "Frankie" of that weird Dark Web story
Doing a rhino
Ain't as easy as it sounds.
They can drink a LOT.

Once drunk, they let go.
The proverbial wildcat.
I mean all night long.
Haiku # 66592, December 18, 2019 2:10 am ET
by DRR of Take notes, Kunta Kinte.
Trichinosis types
Haikus for you: worms pull strings
Attaching limbs, brain
Haiku # 66591, December 18, 2019 12:51 am ET
by 137 Degrees Fahrenheit
Jihadi surprise:
Get 72 virgins
All Gilbert Gottfried
Haiku # 66590, December 18, 2019 12:34 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Divorcing the pig.
Looking for a good rhino.
One that smashes things.
Haiku # 66589, December 17, 2019 11:41 pm ET
by DRR of Tranquilizer gun not needed.
A truly vile place
Swarming with smug liberals
Virtue-signaling
Haiku # 66588, December 17, 2019 11:05 pm ET
by Hell, of course
Bring it ON, you bots
Write something about Greta
(That scowling meatball)
Haiku # 66587, December 17, 2019 9:57 am ET
by Pippi Longstockingholm Syndrome of "How DARE you".
Bots suck at poetry.
They write boring Haiku too.
They have no humor.
Haiku # 66586, December 17, 2019 9:47 am ET
by Some Humans Resemble Bots
PROOF HUMANITY
IS DEHUMANIZING: AUTO-
-BOTS ASSEMBLE!
Haiku # 66585, December 16, 2019 11:26 pm ET
by OPTIMIST PRIME of PROOF OF HUMANITY REQUIREMENT IS RACIST
Greta Thunberg died,
Went to heaven and told them:
You should be ASHAMED.
Haiku # 66584, December 16, 2019 9:26 pm ET
by Nasty Scowling Little Twit of the Progressive North
i wonder if i got
more people here people might
actually use this
Haiku # 66583, December 16, 2019 3:30 pm ET
by vhs
New movie project-
About Greta the screecher-
No its not a joke-

She wanders around
Hollering "how dare you" loud!
all over the world!

Earth ends in eight years!
That is what weird Greta says!
I mean bellows out

Sure to be a hit!
Teenage girl points her finger
At adults and bitches!
Haiku # 66582, December 16, 2019 2:23 pm ET
by Don't go to school of earth ends in eight years
Grumpy lil Greta
Grouchy earth-actvist elf
Kicked out by Santa
Haiku # 66581, December 16, 2019 11:01 am ET
by Santa of Satan
Christmastime: Sweden
Thunbergs didn't get pony
Greta: "HOW DARE YOU
Haiku # 66580, December 16, 2019 11:00 am ET
by You've Stolen My Dreams of I Should Be Outside Riding a Pony
That scowl: "how DARE you."
The breathy troubled-girl-tone.
It still makes me cringe.
Haiku # 66579, December 15, 2019 10:24 pm ET
by Cover of Time
UN berated
By Swedish teen: an oddly
Specific fetish
Haiku # 66578, December 15, 2019 8:25 pm ET
by Innocent Bystander
A hillside at night
Man, lady turn into trees...
Ain't seen that before
Haiku # 66577, December 14, 2019 10:20 pm ET
by Etz
HOW DARE YOU
I SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL
ACROSS THE OCEAN
NOT WRITING BAD HAIKU
Haiku # 66576, December 14, 2019 9:56 pm ET
by Greta Thunberg of Sverige
Lil Greta earth-girl,
Scowling scolding Swedish brat:
warming's where it's AT.
Haiku # 66575, December 13, 2019 11:26 am ET
by Sven Sverige of The Win on Warmin'
Lil grumpy Greta
Is the person of the year?
Not Hongkie Rebels?

Honkies fight slavers
Red Communist SOB's
Damn near to the death

As little Greta
Fly's in on a giant airplane
And blasts out carbon

That's pretty funny
The kid just hollers damn loud
and pulls a grimace.
Haiku # 66574, December 13, 2019 5:41 am ET
by Eric Blowhard of CIA HQ
Well now Democrats
Your impeachment gone to Schifft
All your base now ours.

Is it possible?
For you to get more stupid?
have to wait and see.
Haiku # 66573, December 13, 2019 5:16 am ET
by Eric Blowhard of CIA HQ.
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
Punched in the in the damn head
One too many times I head
One too many times I think
Punched think
Punched in the damn head
One thehd any times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One many times I think
Punched
in the damn head
One too many times I think
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Puned in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched ihe damn head
One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think in the damn
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
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One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Punched in the damn head
One too many times I think
Haiku # 66572, December 13, 2019 12:24 am ET
by Professional Boxer of I forget but I like to eat crayons and see what color my poop will be
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