Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 324 Days and 76717 Haiku later...

Who let in the Swedes?
Fucking meatball head mofos.
Bjork ork muppets!
Haiku # 60586, October 29, 2018 10:19 pm ET
by Darth Very Hairy Stinky Kitten of by "kitten" I mean pussy, by pussy I mean cuntfart cunt
Weird site vor jiskk
Cevlak se jrokka lak bes.
Nur poop grivva vesc
Haiku # 60585, October 29, 2018 8:39 pm ET
by Cegdal
Hai Hai Hai Hai Hai
Hai hai hai hai hai hai hai
Hai hai hai hai KU!!
Haiku # 60584, October 29, 2018 8:15 pm ET
by (God) bless you of Everywhere
Whispering warm breeze
Circling bumblebees knees
Jumped by Ma Nature
Haiku # 60583, October 29, 2018 8:11 pm ET
by It's my nature of Granola Barstool..they make ya poop
That hospital food
May I suggest the long pig?
One with a hard on
Haiku # 60582, October 29, 2018 7:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth is not kitten
Haiku # 60581, October 29, 2018 7:50 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
On the other hand (the hairy one we beat off with) my ooops chute shall never be silenced! Oops shouldn't have had Smartfood. At first the farts wouldn't make an exit. After a few days we hit pay dirt.
Haiku # 60580, October 29, 2018 7:47 pm ET
by #2
Mute Porcine poop chutes
Becept for the crunch of munch
Pig Ass Anus Meat
Haiku # 60579, October 29, 2018 7:44 pm ET
by Watcher of Pigfuckers
You gents are funny
Mooning you both. Toot Pa Toot!
cuntfart cuntfart cunt
Haiku # 60578, October 29, 2018 7:40 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
When you eat cracklins
Your undies get a spacklin
Is it like bacon?
Haiku # 60577, October 29, 2018 7:38 pm ET
by Need2know
They're the same poet.
VHS, Darth Figpucker,
and Starkitten's balls.
Haiku # 60576, October 29, 2018 7:37 pm ET
by It's a fact!
Dear Darth Figpucker
When I stand by dishwasher
Haiku # 60575, October 29, 2018 7:35 pm ET
by Starkitten of Dishwasher. Had a random thought about monkeys being raped. Thought of Peter Gabriel and then came directly to iPad to read your
A fig pucker is
a dimple on a ripe fig.
Right size for my dick.

Worms do not enter
by way of the urethra.
But haiku sure can.

The tricky nose is
in my head via tainted
pork taint consumption.

Shit hole country food.
Shitlin chitlin pork anus.
Safer to fuck pigs.

Cracklin crunchy treats.
Sphincter stinked her movie snacks.
Deep fried fecal chutes.

Pork skin and "innards".
Saturated palm oil.
MSG, of course.

Heart doctors love it.
Keeps them in the green, you know.
And on the golf green.
Haiku # 60574, October 29, 2018 7:33 pm ET
Humans write haiku.
Chimps have been known to rape frogs.
The chimps are smarter.
Haiku # 60573, October 29, 2018 7:09 pm ET
Them frogs been croaking
Patient in Isolation
Beat off. sleeping now
Haiku # 60572, October 29, 2018 4:26 pm ET
by Haiku General Hospital of Wait til he eats his words at mealtime
Increase the dosage
Page Bertha from Obstetrics
Sit her on his face
Haiku # 60571, October 29, 2018 3:47 pm ET
Hi Mom, just got home
from the Haiku Wars. I made
purse from Darth's nut-sack.
Haiku # 60570, October 29, 2018 3:29 pm ET
by when you Puck Figs you can get bad case of Tricky-Gnosis
Dr. Starkitten
Wonderful bedside manner
Insert Catheter
Haiku # 60569, October 29, 2018 3:22 pm ET
by Owwwwwwwwwwewwwweeeeeeeeeeeeee
Resting comfortably
No details other than this:
His dink's in traction
Haiku # 60568, October 29, 2018 3:19 pm ET
by Haiku General of Corner of Piss and Moan
He's seeing double
Thinks Figpucker's Starkitten
Please.. can you help hm?
Haiku # 60567, October 29, 2018 3:12 pm ET
by To be continued
Right ths way, doctor
He's slumped over his haiku
Went bat shit crazy
Haiku # 60566, October 29, 2018 3:10 pm ET
by Unseen Marcus Welby of The Madness of Haiku
Satori ! It's true.
Pigfucker is Starkitten.
Haiku # 60565, October 29, 2018 2:35 pm ET
by VHS less insane than most of them in here (haiku asylum)
I think someone's been watching too much CNN. (Counterfeit New Network) and FOX (Fake Orgasm Xenophobes). You liberal right wing nazi hippies acid smoking boy rapers all the same.
Haiku # 60564, October 29, 2018 2:24 pm ET
Impregnate Donald's hair.
Cheetos overrun the earth.
Fistfuck the polar bears.

Reach deep inside.
Pull out a seal carcass.
It's still warm, so fuck it.

Dayglow fluorescent orange semen.
A beacon of hope for kid fuckers.
A warning to hippie junkie crackheads
and dark skinned Losers.
Haiku # 60563, October 29, 2018 2:14 pm ET
by Pres. Donald Trump, pussy grabber extraordanaire.
You pathetic bitch
Your funt is so clogged with filth
You need a Funt-Shunt
Haiku # 60562, October 29, 2018 2:11 pm ET
by Your cardiologist is a gynecologist of mediocre haiku!
Your body fluids
Leave a tell-tale crusty stain
On Donald's necktie
Haiku # 60561, October 29, 2018 2:07 pm ET
by prejaculate of post-immaculate
politico kid fister
raping his nephew's tight ass
'cause wife won't do anal

and his son fight's back.

Right wing Deliverance Nazi drinks his newphew's tears, wrung out from the pillow case.

How's the wall going? Mexico got out the check book yet?
Haiku # 60560, October 29, 2018 2:05 pm ET
by Bernie Sander's pet bobbit worm.
Bow down and worship
Kneel before your Lord Cheeto.
Plead orange mercy.
Haiku # 60559, October 29, 2018 2:01 pm ET
by burning holy mountain of cheeto purifying flames
When poets jerk off
And release prejaculate
That is your haiku
Haiku # 60558, October 29, 2018 1:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Putin? Is princess.
TRUMP: Czar of all the Russias.
You will please shut up.
Haiku # 60557, October 29, 2018 1:55 pm ET
by Ivan the Terrible of terrible Haiku
Funtcart funtcart funt
Used that line too many times
Put FUNT back in CART !
Haiku # 60556, October 29, 2018 1:51 pm ET
by Funt Cart support unit #57D of Old Albanian widow's exposed funt
Putin is the king
Trump is his fat prison bitch
....That is the real news
Haiku # 60555, October 29, 2018 1:49 pm ET
by Concerned American
Quit yer goose stepping
Clean your liverwurst cum stains
Perhaps a shower?
Haiku # 60554, October 29, 2018 1:46 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Char-B-Q'd Trump Roast
Pigfucked fat orange ass pit
Lord shriveled cheeto
Haiku # 60553, October 29, 2018 1:43 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Barack Clinton Bush
Used to be your prezident.
TRUMP is now your king
Haiku # 60552, October 29, 2018 1:42 pm ET
by sorry about the will of the American people, thweetie
Twenty four, seven
Sixty nine, poontang, BLOWJOB
cuntfart cuntfart cunt
Haiku # 60551, October 29, 2018 1:37 pm ET
by G. Whiz
Farth Digpucker's lines:
Gentle breeze caresses grass
Milk-white lambs bleat, shit...
Haiku # 60550, October 29, 2018 1:35 pm ET
by by by by by of baaa baaaa baaaaaaaaaaaa
Giddy, hovering
Defecating in the mouth
Of your "president"
Haiku # 60549, October 29, 2018 1:33 pm ET
by Good Citizen
Love you, leftist scum
Love your culture and values
Love you till you die
Haiku # 60548, October 29, 2018 1:29 pm ET
by loving our enemies we get tired of not hating them
Twenty-four, thirteen
Eleven, seventy-five
Seventeen -- HAIK(U) !
Haiku # 60547, October 29, 2018 1:23 pm ET
by the 40-yard line of taking the knee for D.J. Trump Mein Fuhrer
Submerged in foul shit,
Dry-heaving graphic sex-terms:
Your brain on Haiku
Haiku # 60546, October 29, 2018 1:15 pm ET
by lon ba by lon ba by lon of Chaldea
Another quick one
To remind you of the fact
That Trump is your lord
Haiku # 60545, October 29, 2018 1:05 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Tadpoles are silent.
And yet frogs make so much noise.
Humans are the same.
Haiku # 60544, October 29, 2018 8:33 am ET
This site averages
seven and a half haiku
per day, that's not bad.
Haiku # 60543, October 29, 2018 6:26 am ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I hate statistics.
How futile life is.
It is here an then it's not.
And there's no meaning.

Well, there is one thing.
And that's killing mosquitoes.
Kill every last one.
Haiku # 60542, October 29, 2018 6:21 am ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I can feel your anger. It gives you focus!
Portable penis
No baculum..the dink bone
Just David Crosby
Haiku # 60541, October 29, 2018 2:41 am ET
by Exception to the rule since he is a walrus
Balls, huge and hairy.
Goats, pigs, bulls, and porpoises.
Why are men's so small?
Haiku # 60540, October 29, 2018 12:34 am ET
Mork was amazing.
More convincing than ET.
More cunning linguist.

But did Mork ever watch LOTR trilogy?
What would he have thought of orcs?
Haiku # 60539, October 29, 2018 12:19 am ET
Mork was amazing.
More convincing than ET.
Truly alien.
Haiku # 60538, October 29, 2018 12:15 am ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER of Mourning a great comedian.
As if by magic
The haikus flowed sweet and clean
Trickled down your leg
Haiku # 60537, October 28, 2018 10:33 pm ET
by Joker of Holding pan of warm water . Your hand is soaking
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >