BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years
70 Days
69707 Haikus
That hospital food
May I suggest the long pig?
One with a hard on
Haiku #60582, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 7:53 pm ET

Darth is not kitten
Haiku #60581, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 7:50 pm ET

On the other hand (the hairy one we beat off with) my ooops chute shall never be silenced! Oops shouldn't have had Smartfood. At first the farts wouldn't make an exit. After a few days we hit pay dirt.
Haiku #60580, by #2
October 29, 2018 7:47 pm ET

Mute Porcine poop chutes
Becept for the crunch of munch
Pig Ass Anus Meat
Haiku #60579, by Watcher of Pigfuckers
October 29, 2018 7:44 pm ET

You gents are funny
Mooning you both. Toot Pa Toot!
cuntfart cuntfart cunt
Haiku #60578, by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
October 29, 2018 7:40 pm ET

When you eat cracklins
Your undies get a spacklin
Is it like bacon?
Haiku #60577, by Need2know
October 29, 2018 7:38 pm ET

They're the same poet.
VHS, Darth Figpucker,
and Starkitten's balls.
Haiku #60576, by It's a fact!
October 29, 2018 7:37 pm ET

Dear Darth Figpucker
When I stand by dishwasher
Haiku #60575, by Starkitten of Dishwasher. Had a random thought about monkeys being raped. Thought of Peter Gabriel and then came directly to iPad to read your
October 29, 2018 7:35 pm ET

A fig pucker is
a dimple on a ripe fig.
Right size for my dick.

Worms do not enter
by way of the urethra.
But haiku sure can.

The tricky nose is
in my head via tainted
pork taint consumption.

Shit hole country food.
Shitlin chitlin pork anus.
Safer to fuck pigs.

Cracklin crunchy treats.
Sphincter stinked her movie snacks.
Deep fried fecal chutes.

Pork skin and "innards".
Saturated palm oil.
MSG, of course.

Heart doctors love it.
Keeps them in the green, you know.
And on the golf green.
Haiku #60574, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 29, 2018 7:33 pm ET

Humans write haiku.
Chimps have been known to rape frogs.
The chimps are smarter.
Haiku #60573, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 29, 2018 7:09 pm ET

Them frogs been croaking
Patient in Isolation
Beat off. sleeping now
Haiku #60572, by Haiku General Hospital of Wait til he eats his words at mealtime
October 29, 2018 4:26 pm ET

Increase the dosage
Page Bertha from Obstetrics
Sit her on his face
Haiku #60571, by STAT
October 29, 2018 3:47 pm ET

Hi Mom, just got home
from the Haiku Wars. I made
purse from Darth's nut-sack.
Haiku #60570, by when you Puck Figs you can get bad case of Tricky-Gnosis
October 29, 2018 3:29 pm ET

Dr. Starkitten
Wonderful bedside manner
Insert Catheter
Haiku #60569, by Owwwwwwwwwwewwwweeeeeeeeeeeeee
October 29, 2018 3:22 pm ET

Resting comfortably
No details other than this:
His dink's in traction
Haiku #60568, by Haiku General of Corner of Piss and Moan
October 29, 2018 3:19 pm ET

He's seeing double
Thinks Figpucker's Starkitten
Please.. can you help hm?
Haiku #60567, by To be continued
October 29, 2018 3:12 pm ET

Right ths way, doctor
He's slumped over his haiku
Went bat shit crazy
Haiku #60566, by Unseen Marcus Welby of The Madness of Haiku
October 29, 2018 3:10 pm ET

Satori ! It's true.
Pigfucker is Starkitten.
Haiku #60565, by VHS less insane than most of them in here (haiku asylum)
October 29, 2018 2:35 pm ET

I think someone's been watching too much CNN. (Counterfeit New Network) and FOX (Fake Orgasm Xenophobes). You liberal right wing nazi hippies acid smoking boy rapers all the same.
Haiku #60564, by
October 29, 2018 2:24 pm ET

Impregnate Donald's hair.
Cheetos overrun the earth.
Fistfuck the polar bears.

Reach deep inside.
Pull out a seal carcass.
It's still warm, so fuck it.

Dayglow fluorescent orange semen.
A beacon of hope for kid fuckers.
A warning to hippie junkie crackheads
and dark skinned Losers.
Haiku #60563, by Pres. Donald Trump, pussy grabber extraordanaire.
October 29, 2018 2:14 pm ET

You pathetic bitch
Your funt is so clogged with filth
You need a Funt-Shunt
Haiku #60562, by Your cardiologist is a gynecologist of mediocre haiku!
October 29, 2018 2:11 pm ET

Your body fluids
Leave a tell-tale crusty stain
On Donald's necktie
Haiku #60561, by prejaculate of post-immaculate
October 29, 2018 2:07 pm ET

politico kid fister
raping his nephew's tight ass
'cause wife won't do anal

and his son fight's back.

Right wing Deliverance Nazi drinks his newphew's tears, wrung out from the pillow case.

How's the wall going? Mexico got out the check book yet?
Haiku #60560, by Bernie Sander's pet bobbit worm.
October 29, 2018 2:05 pm ET

Bow down and worship
Kneel before your Lord Cheeto.
Plead orange mercy.
Haiku #60559, by burning holy mountain of cheeto purifying flames
October 29, 2018 2:01 pm ET

When poets jerk off
And release prejaculate
That is your haiku
Haiku #60558, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 1:56 pm ET

Putin? Is princess.
TRUMP: Czar of all the Russias.
You will please shut up.
Haiku #60557, by Ivan the Terrible of terrible Haiku
October 29, 2018 1:55 pm ET

Funtcart funtcart funt
Used that line too many times
Put FUNT back in CART !
Haiku #60556, by Funt Cart support unit #57D of Old Albanian widow's exposed funt
October 29, 2018 1:51 pm ET

Putin is the king
Trump is his fat prison bitch
....That is the real news
Haiku #60555, by Concerned American
October 29, 2018 1:49 pm ET

Quit yer goose stepping
Clean your liverwurst cum stains
Perhaps a shower?
Haiku #60554, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 1:46 pm ET

Char-B-Q'd Trump Roast
Pigfucked fat orange ass pit
Lord shriveled cheeto
Haiku #60553, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 1:43 pm ET

Barack Clinton Bush
Used to be your prezident.
TRUMP is now your king
Haiku #60552, by sorry about the will of the American people, thweetie
October 29, 2018 1:42 pm ET

Twenty four, seven
Sixty nine, poontang, BLOWJOB
cuntfart cuntfart cunt
Haiku #60551, by G. Whiz
October 29, 2018 1:37 pm ET

Farth Digpucker's lines:
Gentle breeze caresses grass
Milk-white lambs bleat, shit...
Haiku #60550, by by by by by of baaa baaaa baaaaaaaaaaaa
October 29, 2018 1:35 pm ET

Giddy, hovering
Defecating in the mouth
Of your "president"
Haiku #60549, by Good Citizen
October 29, 2018 1:33 pm ET

Love you, leftist scum
Love your culture and values
Love you till you die
Haiku #60548, by loving our enemies we get tired of not hating them
October 29, 2018 1:29 pm ET

Twenty-four, thirteen
Eleven, seventy-five
Seventeen -- HAIK(U) !
Haiku #60547, by the 40-yard line of taking the knee for D.J. Trump Mein Fuhrer
October 29, 2018 1:23 pm ET

Submerged in foul shit,
Dry-heaving graphic sex-terms:
Your brain on Haiku
Haiku #60546, by lon ba by lon ba by lon of Chaldea
October 29, 2018 1:15 pm ET

Another quick one
To remind you of the fact
That Trump is your lord
Haiku #60545, by Anonymous Poet
October 29, 2018 1:05 pm ET

Tadpoles are silent.
And yet frogs make so much noise.
Humans are the same.
Haiku #60544, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 29, 2018 8:33 am ET

This site averages
seven and a half haiku
per day, that's not bad.
Haiku #60543, by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I hate statistics.
October 29, 2018 6:26 am ET

How futile life is.
It is here an then it's not.
And there's no meaning.

Well, there is one thing.
And that's killing mosquitoes.
Kill every last one.
Haiku #60542, by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I can feel your anger. It gives you focus!
October 29, 2018 6:21 am ET

Portable penis
No baculum..the dink bone
Just David Crosby
Haiku #60541, by Exception to the rule since he is a walrus
October 29, 2018 2:41 am ET

Balls, huge and hairy.
Goats, pigs, bulls, and porpoises.
Why are men's so small?
Haiku #60540, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 29, 2018 12:34 am ET

Mork was amazing.
More convincing than ET.
More cunning linguist.

But did Mork ever watch LOTR trilogy?
What would he have thought of orcs?
Haiku #60539, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 29, 2018 12:19 am ET

Mork was amazing.
More convincing than ET.
Truly alien.
Haiku #60538, by DARTH FIGPUCKER of Mourning a great comedian.
October 29, 2018 12:15 am ET

As if by magic
The haikus flowed sweet and clean
Trickled down your leg
Haiku #60537, by Joker of Holding pan of warm water . Your hand is soaking
October 28, 2018 10:33 pm ET

Shazbot mork ork
Midterm erection so yuge
Bad poop bad bad poop
Haiku #60536, by Anonymous Poet
October 28, 2018 8:48 pm ET

I look down my nose
At lowly poetasters..BAH
Wait, that's not my nose
Haiku #60535, by Not my nose of But it's running like a faucet
October 28, 2018 8:38 pm ET

Waited so long for this
My fifteen minutes of fame
I'm a real POET
Haiku #60534, by POET
October 28, 2018 8:36 pm ET

One family member
Is not constipated now
Praised be the Lord
Haiku #60533, by Praised 2 syllables
October 28, 2018 5:13 pm ET