Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 55 Days and 78008 Haiku later...
Stay out of those shops
You'll get syphilis and die
Unhappy ending
Haiku # 65794 September 6, 2019 1:17 am ET
by Warning of Behind binoculars
Coffee shop music.
It has got to be the worst.
Fucking hipster shit.
Haiku # 65793 September 6, 2019 1:12 am ET
by Headphones time!
Special massage price.
One thousand pesos; Twenty bucks.
The tip's included.
Haiku # 65792 September 6, 2019 1:11 am ET
by Thank you, sir. Come again! of And they love my tip!
Hammock hung from trees
Depressed corpse nestled inside
The hoot of an owl
Haiku # 65791 September 6, 2019 12:13 am ET
by Trudging along of Path to Nowhere
Figpucker x-Ray
Head full of dirty poems
Dink in ICU
Haiku # 65790 September 5, 2019 11:36 pm ET
by I see you of Behind binoculars
pink champagne on ice
the warm smell of coalitas
dark desert highway
Haiku # 65789 September 5, 2019 10:02 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pina hospital girl
legs up to her fine tight butt
wants picture with me

Was a little strange
I want something from her too
Please don't tell my wife
Haiku # 65788 September 5, 2019 9:33 pm ET
by Walt Tripp of Hawgs back woods
The Brady Bunch House
Alice on her hands and knees
Meat Delivery
Haiku # 65787 September 5, 2019 9:28 pm ET
by Sam the Butcher of Cloud 9
Two hours w/o porn?
My God, how will you jack off?
Try thinking of me.
Haiku # 65786 September 5, 2019 3:21 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Octopus ink, no,
it does not shoot out the dink.
It comes from its glands.
Haiku # 65785 September 5, 2019 3:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Electricity out
Interruption of service
For the next two hours
Haiku # 65784 September 5, 2019 1:11 pm ET
by Powerless of Dark
Does octopus ink
Shoot from the octopus dink?
Tell me what you think
Haiku # 65783 September 5, 2019 11:49 am ET
by Sharpie of Permanent
One of the arms of
the male octopus is his
dink, and edible!
Haiku # 65782 September 5, 2019 3:51 am ET
by Asians eat anything. of I prefer squid over octopus though.
Bring your microscope.
Next show at seven thirty.
You pay my bus fare.
Haiku # 65781 September 5, 2019 12:38 am ET
by df
I hate sudoku.
Almost as bad as haiku.
Now I have to poo.
Haiku # 65780 September 5, 2019 12:36 am ET
by
The Second Coming
Of Mister Jeffrey Epstein
Shall renew the earth!
Haiku # 65779 September 4, 2019 8:50 pm ET
by Jesus is Just Allright with Him
Vote Tulsi Gabbard!
Vote Epstein Twenty-twenty!
Vote suck-ass Haiku !
Haiku # 65778 September 4, 2019 8:45 pm ET
by Power of the Dope
Indelible ink
That old cephalopod porn
Inedible dink
Haiku # 65777 September 4, 2019 6:18 pm ET
by Old reliable
Now you're talking Darth.
That WOULD be a little show
(Checking bus schedule )
Haiku # 65776 September 4, 2019 6:16 pm ET
by Ben E. Fitz of Public transportation
Sprayed lighter fluid
up my urethra to be
Captain Flamethrower.

It fucking well works!
Wasted seven cockroaches
with my deadly cock.
Haiku # 65775 September 4, 2019 6:13 pm ET
by Say, why aren't there cuntroaches?
Wow! What a small world.
Did you like my little show?
Next time without pants.
Haiku # 65774 September 4, 2019 6:03 pm ET
by df

Rode the bus today
Goofy passenger stood up
Farted and shat self
Haiku # 65773 September 4, 2019 4:09 pm ET
by Passenger of Waiting for another bus now
Fart binoculars
Magnify the smell and sound
Of any cut fart
Haiku # 65772 September 4, 2019 3:57 pm ET
by Silencio of Butt end
13 th Commandment
Thou shalt not deliver mail
To your neighbor's slot
Haiku # 65771 September 4, 2019 1:59 pm ET
by Postmaster of Gone Postal
We all have a chance
To write meaningful haiku
In ink, blood or spooj
Haiku # 65770 September 4, 2019 1:56 pm ET
by Poetry Robot of I wrote mine in grease
Fuck counting.
That's what Excel is for.
Ejaculate your creativity!
Right into your neighbor's mail slot.
Tell the police it's the ink with which your write fine poetry. Offer to write them a poem to give to their wives or girlfriends. Tell them it's the Divine Word of God. Enjoy your vacation.
Haiku # 65769 September 4, 2019 1:06 pm ET
by Donald Trump's 2nd Favorite Hairpiece. of That's Hairpiece, not Herpes.
I only did #65756 to #65762.
Oh, shit that was more than five syllables.
Eat my man cunt!
Haiku # 65768 September 4, 2019 12:57 pm ET
by df
Five of those poems
Are the work of Figpucker
Two by starkitten
Haiku # 65767 September 4, 2019 10:36 am ET
by Haiku accounting dept of Office
Last seven haikus
Were not abominable...
just very boring
Haiku # 65766 September 4, 2019 9:34 am ET
by Chairman Moo of Vacaville
Dink dink dink dink dink
Dink dink dink dink dink dink dink
Dink dink dink dink dink
Haiku # 65765 September 4, 2019 4:03 am ET
by Sausage dink of Dink rink
Faint sound of popping
Butter at room temperature
Preferred lubricant
Haiku # 65764 September 4, 2019 4:01 am ET
by Orville
Picked from the lineup
Sick, enormous ear of corn
with a cornrection
Haiku # 65763 September 4, 2019 3:38 am ET
by Orville Redenbacher of Corn hole
If you have a stroke
while having a heart attack,
would you masturbate?
Haiku # 65762 September 4, 2019 2:05 am ET
by
God does not love you.
But then neither does Satan.
I guess you're just fucked.
Haiku # 65761 September 4, 2019 2:03 am ET
by
Shit she's just fourteen.
I am such an old pervert.
Fifty bucks?! Too much.
Haiku # 65760 September 4, 2019 1:16 am ET
by
Her tits are quite small.
But at least she is not fat.
How much will she charge?
Haiku # 65759 September 4, 2019 1:14 am ET
by
Bad haiku dot com.
Mirrors facing each other.
No one else can see.
Haiku # 65758 September 4, 2019 1:12 am ET
by And that's a good thing!
Your poems are bad.
When I read them I get sad.
And that makes me mad.
Haiku # 65757 September 4, 2019 1:11 am ET
by
Rinky-dink dink stink.
Think pink wink ink blink sink skink.
Brink link mink rat-fink.
Haiku # 65756 September 4, 2019 1:10 am ET
by
Enormous toaster
Each slot contains a human
Breakfast at God's place
Haiku # 65755 September 4, 2019 12:42 am ET
by Yummly
ET's shriveled dink
Bicycle seat still moist
Up up and away
Haiku # 65754 September 4, 2019 12:38 am ET
by Douchebag of Under old willow
What's the nastiest
thing you have put in your mouth?
Cooked pig testicles?
Haiku # 65753 September 4, 2019 12:01 am ET
by
Jar Jar Binks' asshole.
Google image search for it.
Jacked off seven times.
Haiku # 65752 September 3, 2019 11:53 pm ET
by Jello Pudding Pops of Roofie flavored.
After anal sex
Cuntfart farted a fetus.
It tried to eat us.

Figpucker cooked it.
Then fucked and sucked and ate it.
Pics are on Facebook.
Haiku # 65751 September 3, 2019 9:32 pm ET
by You nasty fuckers, you.
Wait, those aren't poets!
They're just globs of cancer meat.
Whew! What a close one!

Cancer writes haiku.
Literary scholars swoon.
Best poem award.

Cryogenic sperm
Left on table Arby's.
Used for Horsey Sauce.

And wouldn't you know,
now the roast beef is pregnant.
Looks just like a cunt.
Haiku # 65750 September 3, 2019 9:28 pm ET
by Well, your mom's anyway.
Caddyshack beaver
Maybe it was a groundhog
Well, Darth would fuck it
Haiku # 65749 September 3, 2019 9:21 pm ET
by Gopher of Nineteenth green
Vaginal pus sacs
release mold spores in the air.
Be still; breathe deeply.

Your lung becomes cunt.
Vomit conjoined headless twins.
Figpucker / Cuntfart.

Consequences of
sucking cock at library.
Booze & haikus ooze.

Impregnated lung
births deformed haiku poets
into the toilet.
Haiku # 65748 September 3, 2019 9:17 pm ET
by Flush of Oh no, it's clogged!
Chicom's rule China
Enslave billions of people
Now they want the world

Hongkies can see it
They do not want to be slaves
Fight like the devil

But sad- they will lose!
Hunted down and killed
By Communist thugs..
Haiku # 65747 September 3, 2019 9:14 pm ET
by Baton Urgern Von Sternberg of Mongolia
Fart decibel limit
Maximum pubic hair growth
I don't follow rules
Haiku # 65746 September 3, 2019 8:41 pm ET
by Rule Breaker
Unrest in Hong Kong
started by one bad Haiku.
See how trouble grows
Haiku # 65745 September 3, 2019 8:18 pm ET
by Gang of Four-Star Restaurant
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