Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 340 Days and 72801 Haikus later...

nothing to guess pearls thrown
to swine are trampled then they
turn to rend others
Haiku # 61902, January 31, 2019 2:51 am ET
by vhs
Are the waffles blue
And if so, that is your clue
The chef was guess who
Haiku # 61901, January 30, 2019 10:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
waffle house is just
freaking heaven and i dont
talk food too much, y'all
Haiku # 61900, January 30, 2019 8:31 pm ET
by vhs of send waffle house to yankee lands, right away!
Oh not this again
Someone said we breathe the farts
Of Adolph Hitler
Haiku # 61899, January 30, 2019 5:46 pm ET
by He stinx
The Hero returns
Fresh battle scars and tall tales
But now, let us feast!
Haiku # 61898, January 30, 2019 4:32 pm ET
by Hamberders for everyone
Only one person
talks about poo rubbing off...
And who might that be?
Haiku # 61897, January 30, 2019 3:37 pm ET
by The Mighty Darth of Figpuckery
Someone
Haiku # 61896, January 30, 2019 3:27 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Is this really true?
Their greatness rubs off on you?
How about the poo?
Haiku # 61895, January 30, 2019 1:49 pm ET
by I love Haiku
Don't usually do this but I though of all of you fellow Haikooks:

(...When you write a haiku, the masters from Matsuo Basho to Kobayashi Issa are also remembered, and your readers give a mental nod in their direction. Some of their excellence rubs off on your work, merely through you applying the discipline of the form.)

from M. Bijman:
https://sevencircumstances.com/poetry-and-lyrics/why-i-hate-poetry/
Haiku # 61894, January 30, 2019 11:44 am ET
by Matsuo Koboyashi of 575 High Ku Ave.
Time waits for no one-
its a damn good fooking thing
when times up- thats it.
Haiku # 61893, January 30, 2019 6:17 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
I held open-door
She said "chivalry not dead"
Was thinking.. with head
Haiku # 61892, January 30, 2019 6:10 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Home depot or hell?
Wander around- can't find chit
Hell same--as depot-
Haiku # 61891, January 30, 2019 6:00 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Caveman rebellion:
Time to storm projection room
(Plato's Cave Act II)
Haiku # 61890, January 30, 2019 5:56 am ET
by True Illumination of Eternal Day
there comes a time when
real life wins, no answer back
no more platos cave
Haiku # 61889, January 30, 2019 4:41 am ET
by vhs
i still get mad at
the critiques out there but you
know this...learn to code
Haiku # 61888, January 30, 2019 3:34 am ET
by vhs
censorship on line
the modern terror, gulags
empty headed skulls
Haiku # 61887, January 30, 2019 3:33 am ET
by vhs
move on from the plat
form that mocks thy content and
let then speak to void
Haiku # 61886, January 30, 2019 3:31 am ET
by vhs
And for no reason
People just started hugging
All over the world
Haiku # 61885, January 30, 2019 1:27 am ET
by This gave me a boner
I've said it before
You know I'll say it again
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt!
Haiku # 61884, January 30, 2019 12:41 am ET
by Red Snapper of Fish Market
Remember the time
You took the axe from your trunk
Fun in the graveyard
Haiku # 61883, January 30, 2019 12:38 am ET
by French Kissers of Graveyard
Eagles hate the man
He emulates seagull style
Falls flat on his face
Haiku # 61882, January 29, 2019 11:21 pm ET
by Lunchmeat president of Garbage chute
if iran is so far
away, and it could not get
away, oh wrong lyrics!
Haiku # 61881, January 29, 2019 10:37 pm ET
by bloody flock of seagulls it was i swear! of deink vhs
Meow and meow
Will anyone hear me now
Lost up in this tree?
Haiku # 61880, January 29, 2019 10:02 pm ET
by Starkitten of Treetops
Don't mind if I do
One person with junk of two
Give myself a screw
Haiku # 61879, January 29, 2019 6:59 pm ET
by Conjoined headless something or other of Freak Show
Intersectional
Cisgender-based buzz
Pure incoherence
Haiku # 61878, January 29, 2019 5:26 pm ET
by Ha Ha of Only 2 Genders
Starkitten! Descend.
Come down off of that tree branch.
You are way too high.
Haiku # 61877, January 29, 2019 2:18 pm ET
by Ladder of Local Fire Dept.
Intoxicating
Fizzy Haiku Elixir
Don
Haiku # 61876, January 29, 2019 1:47 pm ET
by High AF starkitten of Cloud 5-7-5
Haiku will save us.
Haiku will defeat evil.
Count syllables. Yup.
Haiku # 61875, January 29, 2019 8:06 am ET
by Triumphal Entry into the Immortal Halls of Glory upon Parnassus' Holy Peak
Let the poems flow
Something for everyone here
Don't give up on it
Haiku # 61874, January 28, 2019 11:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The only reason
Haiku has been ridiculed
It's ridiculous
Haiku # 61873, January 28, 2019 11:16 pm ET
by Poem in my bum
This wrinkly flesh rod
The patent holder is God
The Holy Boomstick
Haiku # 61872, January 28, 2019 10:20 pm ET
by Triskelion (yawn) of 3 legged race
Dude. Whip that thing out
In five-seven-five haiku.
That's IT? What a joke.
Haiku # 61871, January 28, 2019 6:52 pm ET
by Flash of Inspiration
Measure for measure
It's a national treasure
Designed for Pleasure
Haiku # 61870, January 28, 2019 6:13 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I pity da fool
Who thinks he's got a big tool
Mine is the longest
Haiku # 61869, January 28, 2019 6:12 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
To never get past
membranes, glands, body fluids...
Pity that poet!
Haiku # 61868, January 28, 2019 5:52 pm ET
by Poet of Show It
I dream of Jeanie
Now then, Did she menstruate?
Or Blink it away?
Haiku # 61867, January 28, 2019 5:14 pm ET
by Viewer of In front of screen
Mona Lisa smile
Barbara Walters lisping smile
Smile Vertically
Haiku # 61866, January 28, 2019 5:11 pm ET
by Guy Smiley
Whatever you want
I guarantee you it's here
On this fine website
Haiku # 61865, January 28, 2019 5:09 pm ET
by Fan
That Mona Walter
and Ayaan Hirsi Ali:
women for our age.

https://tinyurl.com/yd43zl24

https://tinyurl.com/ybrqeax9
Haiku # 61864, January 28, 2019 2:09 pm ET
by Galab Wanaagsan of Kushitic Punt
Walk into the gloom
Yes, it's all waiting for you
You will blend right in
Haiku # 61863, January 28, 2019 3:39 am ET
by Gray Person
Ghosts are a problem
Like when they sit behind you
Making pottery
Haiku # 61862, January 28, 2019 3:35 am ET
by Demi
of course i do, who?
i used to chew, tobacco
now i dont do that
Haiku # 61861, January 27, 2019 10:28 pm ET
by vhs
The Pope had to poop
Squishing would not work this time
Too late, shit his gown
Haiku # 61860, January 27, 2019 10:08 pm ET
by Shatagain City
Praying at the moon
Christian Werewolf here to serve
And play the oldies
Haiku # 61859, January 27, 2019 9:44 pm ET
by Bee Bop a loo ba

Seems like you finally
Got that five-seven-five thing
down consistently
Haiku # 61858, January 27, 2019 7:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
someone directed
inspirational christian
stuff to my twitter!!!
Haiku # 61857, January 27, 2019 7:11 pm ET
by vhs of not an inspirational Christian
the folks who post here
or on twitter, i do we
don't know each other

well someone does but...
other than that...
Haiku # 61856, January 27, 2019 6:46 pm ET
by vhs
yes i did go through
that incarnation here and
I'm still mouthy toots
Haiku # 61855, January 27, 2019 6:42 pm ET
by vhs
Q for VHS:
are you the one named Moxie
from way back Haiku?
Haiku # 61854, January 27, 2019 6:40 pm ET
by Mainely of Maine
There is Lord of Lords,
there is also Lourdes of Lourdes.
Darth is lewd of lewds.
Haiku # 61853, January 27, 2019 6:36 pm ET
by Lard of Lards
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