Colonel sanders here
You have to fuck the chicken
That is the secret

And then we'll fly off
Catch up with the Hale Boppers
You just might get laid

With a glass of milk
Toast cut in triangle shapes
To enhance flavor

No holiday guests
No holiday meal. Just toast
And peanut butter

You can see the stench
Haikus rotting in the sun
It's all your fault,dude

Peanut butter toast
Is my all time favorite meal
Can you dig it, babe

Swing by. Pick me up
Let's drive straight into the sun
Burn, motherfucker!

Melancholy Turd
Abandoned in Menswear aisle
On Fitting Room floor

Hard work, these poems
Up before sunrise, milking
Syllables. Smells foul.

Turkey shaped clogger
Forgot plunger in England
Call it Grog with Log

Up close.magnified
Every pore and crumb of shit
Anal Viewmaster

Swinging high high high
Away I fly fly fly
Into a shitpile

That sounds G rated
Compared to Jim Bob's skill
Fuckbasting the Bird

Hard as Plymouth Rock
Wipe your hands on the stray dogs
Jizzed Brussels sprouts

I know what it is
Got a headless conjoined twin
Call it double junk

I wouldn't know what DVDA was if not for Matt Stone and Trey Parker. What would Brian Boitano Do?

Thanksgiving themed porn.
Pilgrims bang Poke-a-hot-ass,
the big chief's daughter.

Let us bow our heads.
Lord, we thank you for this feast
of pussy and tits.

"I like the fish pie."
Licking whipped cream off her tits.
Let's stuff this here bird.

Mock English accents.
Olden-speak DVDA.
She was stuffed alright!

Pilgrims pulling penis
Pumpkin pie pig-out packs pounds
Pilgrim Poontang

Hood boss VHS
He's in charge of pies this year
He'll prolly fuck them

Making hand turkeys
So boring. Trace Grandad's schlong!
It's a shapeshifter

Corn acreage here
Save the cobs to wipe our bums
Huge turkey wattle!

What a hearty meal
Feel free to unzip your pants
Free your blunderbus

You say "circle jerk"
As if that would be a bad thing.
Turkey grease on palms.

Extra white gravy.
Do not let it go to waste.
Mixed with your stuffing.

A bottled green gas
would be the perfect stinky
x-mas gift for me.

X-mas from the ass.
The lass passed gas from her ass,
bottled in clear gas.

The gas was off-green,
looking sort of like chlorine,
But much more toxic.

The first Thanksgiving
Wasn't it a circle jerk
Around the table?

That ain't no crime, Darth
You left a work of art there
Hanging in the loo

The longer I live
The more I look like Santa
I want to believe

Forget about a kiss
Mistletoe Fellatio
A gift from our dog

Bottling my farts
To give as holiday gifts
Some are Grinch green, too

Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Now shout it from the rooftops!
You can be a star

I forgot to flush.
That's, my friend, my only crime.
Death sentence imposed.

Ah, fuck it, not in the mood to count.
5757575757557575757575. piss on it.

Take the o from count.
Then release your flatulence.
Then repeat step one.

You've got cunthfart cunt.

JOY!

Breaking down the wind
One fart at a time. Mindful.
Yeah, God would like that

Sir Darth Figpucker
A fugitive from justice
Conditioner Theft

Mustard on his dick
Ketchup on his balls. What's next?
Mayo on the walls

An abusuve God
Who needs it. Trash Deadbeat dad
Dude, give it a rest

You make the art here.
Get your head out of your ass.
Fear God. Then create.

Here there is no art.
I think I've said that before.
No one believes me.

I do not

Give that girl some mustard!

The penis is a hot dog.

The Grinch has dog penis.

The dog has grinch feet

Even though I

With each somersault
I release diarrhea
Look, I made a trail

Doc. Darth Figpucker
His Haiku can cure the sick
Stop Diarrhea

Do midgets have big dicks?
Or do they just look bigger
On midget body

YOU give her cunnilingus.

It only lets me write one line of haiku

Give your wife cunnilingus

I have diarrhea

Are midgets