Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 153 Days and 70443 Haikus later...

I am not a robot.
Of COURSE I am not a robot!
...the fuck wrong with you ?
Haiku # 59312, September 11, 2018 8:55 am ET
by Hirosaki Nagashima of all the stupid names you could imagine
Not necessary !
bad Haiku verse is strictly
unnecessary.
Haiku # 59311, September 11, 2018 8:53 am ET
by Nagashima Hirosaki of Sake Tumi
This is my vengeance
upon the Haiku verse-form:
hours of boredom.
Haiku # 59310, September 11, 2018 8:50 am ET
by Harajuku of Harakiri
Oh Haiku warriors,
compose yourselves. Get ready.
Battle commences.
Haiku # 59309, September 11, 2018 8:48 am ET
by Sukiyaki-san of Shinjuku
I do not love you.
In fact, I think I hate you.
Lets go home and fuck.
Haiku # 59308, September 11, 2018 3:46 am ET
by
You're my only friend
And I'm not sure you like me
At least I have that
Haiku # 59307, September 10, 2018 9:53 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Saw you standing there
All covered with Bad Haiku
Sandpaper tongue bath
Haiku # 59306, September 10, 2018 8:41 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest All Cat Day Spa
Do you knit doll clothes?
No, these are penis sweaters.
What size will you need?
Haiku # 59305, September 10, 2018 8:35 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Custom Knit Penis Sweaters
Visit our kiosk
Conveniently located
In my dog's rear end
Haiku # 59304, September 10, 2018 8:25 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Anal Poolius 10 % Discount for Tortoises
Protein shake,my friend
Refreshment from dog's back end
Anal Julius
Haiku # 59303, September 10, 2018 8:09 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Friendly Librarians
Isn't it strange the way tortoises will eat dog poop. What do they know that I do not? Am I missing something here? Please research this and let me know. Anxiously awaiting your answer.
Haiku # 59302, September 10, 2018 7:57 pm ET
by
Bask in full moon glow
Levitation. Magic show
Think it's gonna blow..
Haiku # 59301, September 10, 2018 7:21 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
ok mooning the moon
which rise do we rise to
in this occasion?
Haiku # 59300, September 10, 2018 6:52 pm ET
by vhs of spring
Wind lift soft music
Whisker Koto. Gentle strum..
Moon Rise. See my bum!
Haiku # 59299, September 10, 2018 6:29 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Beneath the willow
Hidden Moon on full display
No Kimono Show
Haiku # 59298, September 10, 2018 6:20 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Show Cat
Willow branches bend
My favorite of all God's trees.
Weeping and sighing
Haiku # 59297, September 10, 2018 5:22 pm ET
by Arboreal delerium of cheap Haiku
Cannot glimpse your moon
Clouds have obscured the beauty
Lunar betrayal
Haiku # 59296, September 10, 2018 5:17 pm ET
by Intimations of lunar DOOM
The Captain's Nosehair
All hands on deck! Pull, me hearties!
Wait! That's not his nose!
Haiku # 59295, September 10, 2018 4:09 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Sea Adventures of Yesteryear
Joke on you. Your shoe.
Naughty tree. Saved bag of poop
For certain person
Haiku # 59294, September 10, 2018 4:03 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Arbor Day's of Our Lives Tree Soap Opera
Willow tree, bending
Thoughtfully scooping, bagging
The dog shit you left
Haiku # 59293, September 10, 2018 4:00 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Tree Huggers
I'm throwing doughnuts
Unintentional Ring Toss
As you walk by nude
Haiku # 59292, September 10, 2018 3:27 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Fun and Games
Let me sketch you nude
Don't move. Got no art supplies
Just a dirty mnd
Haiku # 59291, September 10, 2018 3:22 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Life Drawing for Agoraphobic Remote Viewers
Look up! Balloon Boy!!
That little bastard again!
Fly into the sun!!!!
Haiku # 59290, September 10, 2018 3:08 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
It's going as planned
My Bill Murray voodoo doll
Is working just fine
Haiku # 59289, September 10, 2018 3:03 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
How's your day so far?
Are we having fun yet? Yes?
Showing you Full Moon
Haiku # 59288, September 10, 2018 2:56 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
I won't eat donuts.
Can't digest them anymore.
Donut burps for hours . . .
Haiku # 59287, September 10, 2018 2:54 pm ET
by Celestial schoolbus swerves off of road
Continued Outside
Laying in wait for mailman
Nude Bearhug Today!!
Haiku # 59286, September 10, 2018 2:52 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Bath Salts
Starkitten rising
luminous and poetic
behold the moonglow
Haiku # 59285, September 10, 2018 2:51 pm ET
by Buttcheeks against window of of celestial school bus
Did I forget pants?
Cartwheeling. Releasing gas.
Maniacal Laugh!!!
Haiku # 59284, September 10, 2018 2:36 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
That kind of morning.
Hula hooping robot dance!
David Lee Roth flip!!
Haiku # 59283, September 10, 2018 2:33 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Wildcat
I want to moon you
I think we'll be best friends then
Once we get past that
Haiku # 59282, September 10, 2018 2:29 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Bum Show offs
I can't lie to you
Haiku makes me feel sneaky
Right down to my bones
Haiku # 59281, September 10, 2018 2:25 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Haiku Wierdos
Bring me some doughnuts
Plain, Glazed, Chocolate, Jelly filled
I want the real deal
Haiku # 59280, September 10, 2018 2:20 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Found his Dad's yearbook:
Most likely to smote people
Had a Nerd Haircut
Haiku # 59279, September 10, 2018 1:47 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
He rode dinosaurs
Sidesaddle, giving peace sign
Way cool sandals, bro
Haiku # 59278, September 10, 2018 1:43 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Jesus Trivia
In an insane world
Compulsive Haiku writing
Makes things more insane
Haiku # 59277, September 10, 2018 12:34 pm ET
by Uselessness of orientalized forms
Hey you, Free-Thinker:
I am for your liberty.
Do we hate same things?
Haiku # 59276, September 10, 2018 10:41 am ET
by Koalitions of Konvenience
There's no God today.
There was no God yesterday.
Tomorrow, same-same.
Haiku # 59275, September 10, 2018 10:34 am ET
by Jesus the Barbarian
Be nice. Don't offend.
Christian virtue-signaling:
Church of the Milque-Toast
Haiku # 59274, September 10, 2018 9:20 am ET
by Eternal sleep of the "Woke"
stand up sit down kneel
not the church militant
but the church calisthenic
Haiku # 59273, September 10, 2018 8:56 am ET
by vhs
Some cucumbers scream
When they can't find parking space
And they're running late
Haiku # 59272, September 10, 2018 8:47 am ET
by Myriad roles of cucumbers
The cucumber screams
with the pleasure of being
a mere cucumber
Haiku # 59271, September 10, 2018 8:43 am ET
by Garden of Eatin'
Carrots scream because
their color has been usurped
by the Evil Trump
Haiku # 59270, September 10, 2018 8:37 am ET
by POTUS literal incarnation of all evil in universe
At what point did the downfall of the human race begin? Was it any one event? Or a series of catastrophic failures?
My spoon is too big.
Haiku # 59269, September 10, 2018 7:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
If you don't believe
me about screaming carrots,
ask Reverend Maynard.
Haiku # 59268, September 10, 2018 7:37 am ET
by df
Cucumbers don't scream.
Unless my wife uses one
to pleasure herself.

Carrots scream when picked.
I scream when I pick my nose.
Goddamn nose hair plucked.
Haiku # 59267, September 10, 2018 7:34 am ET
by df
A bedtime hotdog
That should help you fall asleep
Nice to meet you, Frank
Haiku # 59266, September 9, 2018 11:26 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Demi Moore loves most
Having relations with ghosts
Must have a sixth sense
Haiku # 59265, September 9, 2018 11:22 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
he insists that she
be he and he be she and
ying yanks each ones yang
Haiku # 59264, September 9, 2018 10:51 pm ET
by vhs
"Not a restful sleep
When dreaming of erections"
-Pippi Longstocking
Haiku # 59263, September 9, 2018 10:43 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Ikea
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >