Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 153 Days and 70445 Haikus later...

How's your day so far?
Are we having fun yet? Yes?
Showing you Full Moon
Haiku # 59288, September 10, 2018 2:56 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
I won't eat donuts.
Can't digest them anymore.
Donut burps for hours . . .
Haiku # 59287, September 10, 2018 2:54 pm ET
by Celestial schoolbus swerves off of road
Continued Outside
Laying in wait for mailman
Nude Bearhug Today!!
Haiku # 59286, September 10, 2018 2:52 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Bath Salts
Starkitten rising
luminous and poetic
behold the moonglow
Haiku # 59285, September 10, 2018 2:51 pm ET
by Buttcheeks against window of of celestial school bus
Did I forget pants?
Cartwheeling. Releasing gas.
Maniacal Laugh!!!
Haiku # 59284, September 10, 2018 2:36 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
That kind of morning.
Hula hooping robot dance!
David Lee Roth flip!!
Haiku # 59283, September 10, 2018 2:33 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Wildcat
I want to moon you
I think we'll be best friends then
Once we get past that
Haiku # 59282, September 10, 2018 2:29 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Bum Show offs
I can't lie to you
Haiku makes me feel sneaky
Right down to my bones
Haiku # 59281, September 10, 2018 2:25 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Haiku Wierdos
Bring me some doughnuts
Plain, Glazed, Chocolate, Jelly filled
I want the real deal
Haiku # 59280, September 10, 2018 2:20 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Found his Dad's yearbook:
Most likely to smote people
Had a Nerd Haircut
Haiku # 59279, September 10, 2018 1:47 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
He rode dinosaurs
Sidesaddle, giving peace sign
Way cool sandals, bro
Haiku # 59278, September 10, 2018 1:43 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Jesus Trivia
In an insane world
Compulsive Haiku writing
Makes things more insane
Haiku # 59277, September 10, 2018 12:34 pm ET
by Uselessness of orientalized forms
Hey you, Free-Thinker:
I am for your liberty.
Do we hate same things?
Haiku # 59276, September 10, 2018 10:41 am ET
by Koalitions of Konvenience
There's no God today.
There was no God yesterday.
Tomorrow, same-same.
Haiku # 59275, September 10, 2018 10:34 am ET
by Jesus the Barbarian
Be nice. Don't offend.
Christian virtue-signaling:
Church of the Milque-Toast
Haiku # 59274, September 10, 2018 9:20 am ET
by Eternal sleep of the "Woke"
stand up sit down kneel
not the church militant
but the church calisthenic
Haiku # 59273, September 10, 2018 8:56 am ET
by vhs
Some cucumbers scream
When they can't find parking space
And they're running late
Haiku # 59272, September 10, 2018 8:47 am ET
by Myriad roles of cucumbers
The cucumber screams
with the pleasure of being
a mere cucumber
Haiku # 59271, September 10, 2018 8:43 am ET
by Garden of Eatin'
Carrots scream because
their color has been usurped
by the Evil Trump
Haiku # 59270, September 10, 2018 8:37 am ET
by POTUS literal incarnation of all evil in universe
At what point did the downfall of the human race begin? Was it any one event? Or a series of catastrophic failures?
My spoon is too big.
Haiku # 59269, September 10, 2018 7:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
If you don't believe
me about screaming carrots,
ask Reverend Maynard.
Haiku # 59268, September 10, 2018 7:37 am ET
by df
Cucumbers don't scream.
Unless my wife uses one
to pleasure herself.

Carrots scream when picked.
I scream when I pick my nose.
Goddamn nose hair plucked.
Haiku # 59267, September 10, 2018 7:34 am ET
by df
A bedtime hotdog
That should help you fall asleep
Nice to meet you, Frank
Haiku # 59266, September 9, 2018 11:26 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Demi Moore loves most
Having relations with ghosts
Must have a sixth sense
Haiku # 59265, September 9, 2018 11:22 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
he insists that she
be he and he be she and
ying yanks each ones yang
Haiku # 59264, September 9, 2018 10:51 pm ET
by vhs
"Not a restful sleep
When dreaming of erections"
-Pippi Longstocking
Haiku # 59263, September 9, 2018 10:43 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Ikea
Blowing Bjorn? Benny?
Side dish choices are many.
Hot Swedish Meatballs

Treat for French Poodles
And atop wide egg noodles
Some folks swallow whole
Haiku # 59262, September 9, 2018 10:29 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Sweden still asleep
Dreaming of their own demise
By diversity
Haiku # 59261, September 9, 2018 9:18 pm ET
by Results of their election ?
Big wet hairy deal;
When I am drunk I cannot feel
But I make her squeal !
Haiku # 59260, September 9, 2018 9:15 pm ET
by Diminished sensation of sensual excitation
Just bending over
Not looking for attention
At the window, nude
Haiku # 59259, September 9, 2018 9:03 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Windows and Gutters
Goes hard and goes soft
Never know which way he'll be
My coconut oil
Haiku # 59258, September 9, 2018 8:53 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Horny Bakery
one dish one cup one
youtube video one big
fat hairy deal now
Haiku # 59257, September 9, 2018 8:43 pm ET
by vhs
Might make some brownies
If the Lizard King bought cocoa
Have everything else
Haiku # 59256, September 9, 2018 8:16 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
India. Twin Bros
Pass-winder, Hold-it-inder
Sort their underwear
Haiku # 59255, September 9, 2018 7:34 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Commercial Laundry Services
No sign of entry
But the place has been ransacked
Got cunt insurance?
Haiku # 59254, September 9, 2018 7:26 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Cunt Insurance
Laurel Canyon, please.
Just drop me off at Jim's place
I'm dog sitting Sage
Haiku # 59253, September 9, 2018 6:58 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Are we to believe
Most people read Bad Haiku
Without posting one?
Haiku # 59252, September 9, 2018 6:41 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Anyone here but us chickens?
This open channel
Like that fun tube at the bank
Commnication
Haiku # 59251, September 9, 2018 5:53 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest I am receiving your signal
That old school lunch smell
Concentrated Cunt Cabbage
Old World Recipe
Haiku # 59250, September 9, 2018 5:47 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Designer of You Are What You Eat poster
wonky conky bo bonky
banana fana fo fonkey
we why woah wonkey!
Haiku # 59249, September 9, 2018 5:40 pm ET
by vhs
They better have some
Cunnilingus in Heaven
And ice cream cones too
Haiku # 59248, September 9, 2018 5:33 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Kooky Konvent
Judgment Day will come
We'll find out nothing mattered
Except the Bad Haiku
Haiku # 59247, September 9, 2018 5:30 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Volunteer Philosophers
Exfoliation
Soon there will be nothing left
Of any of us
Haiku # 59246, September 9, 2018 4:57 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Do cucumbers scream
When they are being pickled?
Asking for a friend.
Haiku # 59245, September 9, 2018 4:51 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Cannery
Conjecture and Proof
Square root of cunnilingus
Is an ice cream cone
Haiku # 59244, September 9, 2018 4:41 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Ding Dong Cart Chasers
Catnap Festival
Ordering delivered feast
And then more catnaps
Haiku # 59243, September 9, 2018 4:14 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Catnapping Consortium
you know i wish that
conspiracy theories were just
that dogs and cats were

in a faction of
battle between the species
for affection
Haiku # 59242, September 9, 2018 2:39 pm ET
by vhs
if the internet
were still 1990s like
google would have 50 competitors

all funnier
Haiku # 59241, September 9, 2018 1:26 pm ET
by vhs
cats and dogs are aliens
he coomunicates by clawing
and emracing and purring

dogs text by peeing
then smelling
Haiku # 59240, September 9, 2018 1:24 pm ET
by vhs
im not an atheist
so ive chosen to believe in something
dukes of hazard
Haiku # 59239, September 9, 2018 1:23 pm ET
by vhs of confederate flag
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