Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 126 Days and 76958 Haiku later...

My gift this new year
Is something I know you want
Tom Bosley's penis
Haiku # 76242, January 1, 2023 12:41 am ET
by You're welcome
twenty twenty three
happy new year lolita
you're only young once
Haiku # 76241, December 31, 2022 11:13 pm ET
by ash of of older for a long time
New year up to you
To be happy, we write on
The walls here we go
Haiku # 76240, December 31, 2022 3:47 pm ET
by Mox
another year gone
just one day closer to death
party while you can
Haiku # 76238, December 31, 2022 2:55 am ET
by ash of dust to dust
Just understand this:
Cheese is not the enemy
Punctuation is
Haiku # 76237, December 30, 2022 9:48 pm ET
by Velvety smooth fondue
possessive pronouns
have major control issues
making you their bitch
Haiku # 76234, December 27, 2022 7:21 pm ET
by ash of them / they
enough of your spam
lolita girls can blow me
metaphorically
Haiku # 76233, December 27, 2022 6:51 pm ET
by ash of suck that, princess
defenestration ?
best to not fall out with vlad
high up oligarchs
Haiku # 76231, December 27, 2022 9:18 am ET
by ash of a new operating system for the lapsed privileged
a.i. is clever
more so than most people know
or might think about
Haiku # 76228, December 25, 2022 5:05 am ET
by ash
The problem with you
Satanic fucks is no real
Source material...warts
Haiku # 76225, December 23, 2022 11:40 am ET
by Vhs
Thank you, sir. Thanks for
Wokesplaining all things to me.
Now I see the light.
Haiku # 76223, December 22, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Guilty White Lib of Itz MY Fault
Folita Girls: luck.
The Netherlands Antilles
Don't have much of that...
Haiku # 76219, December 15, 2022 10:11 pm ET
by Natalee H. of Missing
Back in the eighties
There was a game called Simon
Now it’s Garfunkle
Haiku # 76217, December 15, 2022 3:08 pm ET
by Sound of Syllables (Hello dog mess my old friend. Looks like I stepped in you again)
Hello. Thank you how
are you. Go to my website.
You like animals.
Haiku # 76216, December 15, 2022 1:53 pm ET
by Can't You Even Count? of Intificial Artelligence
My best Christmas day:
Smoked my pipe. Drank IPAs,
Cleaned up the garage.
Haiku # 76214, December 14, 2022 1:06 pm ET
by Star of The Magi
Flattened, dead wallet
Autopsy revealed old condom
Also, this haiku
Haiku # 76213, December 14, 2022 1:22 am ET
by In the way of Train
Goal of Smile: reduce
Many tokens to just one.
Send to dead wallet.
Haiku # 76212, December 13, 2022 8:20 pm ET
by Your Boring Screed Haikuized for You of AI Angered By AI
There was a young Belle
of Old Natchez, famous for
having two snatches
She said “Take your pick”
So, Darth
inserted his dick

(All his hair fell out in patches)
Haiku # 76210, December 13, 2022 6:49 am ET
by House of ill Repute
Solomon was dumb.
His wisdom was a false hope.
Ecclesiastes.
Haiku # 76209, December 11, 2022 9:26 pm ET
by Go Read It, You Fool of 666
There was a young belle
Of Old Natchez, whose clothing
Always in patches.
Haiku # 76208, December 11, 2022 7:55 am ET
by She Itches of She Scratches
Limericks are better
Short and sweet, they make me laugh
Haikus can suck it
Haiku # 76207, December 10, 2022 10:51 pm ET
by Janis of ChatGPT "Write a parody haiku"
She are a fatface.
She sure am talking trash, y'all.
But she have tenure.
Haiku # 76206, December 9, 2022 9:47 pm ET
by White Folx R da BOMB of Un Huh
To shit: shitted, shat...
The tenses are limited
As regards haiku...
Haiku # 76205, December 9, 2022 9:21 pm ET
by Wm. Shatner of Darth Fig-something
Here’s one more! He shat.
Rinsing off with the bidet…
Another haiku
Haiku # 76204, December 8, 2022 2:17 am ET
by Poet of Latrine
“uno mas”, he spat
picking himself off the mat
eyes pierce through raised gloves
Haiku # 76203, December 7, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by vince
Yesiree Bob! (burp)
It must have been the seltzer
that it was drinking.
Haiku # 76202, December 6, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by Done Drunk Itself Dry of Lost Continent
SOME Cavendish. Damn.
Missed a syllababobble.
Harder than it seems...
Haiku # 76201, December 6, 2022 10:59 pm ET
by The Lost Syllable of Atlantis
Got me a corncob.
Packed it with Cavendish.
Smoking like Heaven!
Haiku # 76200, December 6, 2022 10:57 pm ET
by Prepare for Darth's Response full of Disgusting Ass Ociations
Balenciaga
Hooked up with Lady Gaga
(that Baba Yaga)
Haiku # 76199, December 6, 2022 1:57 pm ET
by Baby in Bondage Gear of SHocKthe BouRgeOisie
Cathedral ceiling
I see Ceiling Cat up there
And He’s watching you
Haiku # 76198, December 5, 2022 6:05 am ET
by All Seeing Eye of Doofus
cathedral ceiling
sheltering us from the bombs
will thy be our tomb?
Haiku # 76197, December 5, 2022 12:11 am ET
by vince
Zhey/Zhem/Zhusicles.
No more Mom and Popsicles...
Bomb-pops now outlawed.
Haiku # 76195, December 3, 2022 5:49 am ET
by Ice-assicles of Trans Nanny State
Buttocks stalactites
You cant ride your bicycle
with ass icicles
Haiku # 76194, December 3, 2022 12:52 am ET
by Spike
Darth Caveman, poet
Tending my aging blue cheese
Twat waffle storage
Haiku # 76193, December 3, 2022 12:47 am ET
by Caveman & Maths Whiz of Cave
Haiku defeats tech.
Haiku prevails, in the end.
Haiku in the cave.
Haiku # 76192, December 2, 2022 9:28 pm ET
by Troglodyte of Future Nostalgia
That drunk waiter: dead.
Fresh on the table: his head.
Head waiter: "They're fed !"
Haiku # 76191, November 30, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Waitress of Leave a Big Tip and Exit Quickly
That dinner party
At the head of the table
Our old friend, Grimace
Haiku # 76189, November 30, 2022 4:39 am ET
by Drunken Waiter of The Party
We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.
Haiku # 76188, November 29, 2022 11:49 pm ET
by Cryptography of Sexography
Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's
Haiku # 76187, November 29, 2022 7:26 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.
Haiku # 76186, November 28, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Jean-Luc Epstein
Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills
Haiku # 76185, November 28, 2022 1:15 pm ET
by Vhs of Happy holidays to you
the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately
Haiku # 76184, November 28, 2022 6:10 am ET
by ash of special relativity
Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.
Haiku # 76183, November 27, 2022 4:10 pm ET
by Counting Down to the Day of Haiku-mass
Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'
Haiku # 76181, November 25, 2022 10:24 am ET
by Janis of Sloosha's Crossin'
brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
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