Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 19 Days and 77399 Haiku later...

There was a young Belle
of Old Natchez, famous for
having two snatches
She said “Take your pick”
So, Darth
inserted his dick

(All his hair fell out in patches)
Haiku # 76210, December 13, 2022 6:49 am ET
by House of ill Repute
Solomon was dumb.
His wisdom was a false hope.
Ecclesiastes.
Haiku # 76209, December 11, 2022 9:26 pm ET
by Go Read It, You Fool of 666
There was a young belle
Of Old Natchez, whose clothing
Always in patches.
Haiku # 76208, December 11, 2022 7:55 am ET
by She Itches of She Scratches
Limericks are better
Short and sweet, they make me laugh
Haikus can suck it
Haiku # 76207, December 10, 2022 10:51 pm ET
by Janis of ChatGPT "Write a parody haiku"
She are a fatface.
She sure am talking trash, y'all.
But she have tenure.
Haiku # 76206, December 9, 2022 9:47 pm ET
by White Folx R da BOMB of Un Huh
To shit: shitted, shat...
The tenses are limited
As regards haiku...
Haiku # 76205, December 9, 2022 9:21 pm ET
by Wm. Shatner of Darth Fig-something
Here’s one more! He shat.
Rinsing off with the bidet…
Another haiku
Haiku # 76204, December 8, 2022 2:17 am ET
by Poet of Latrine
“uno mas”, he spat
picking himself off the mat
eyes pierce through raised gloves
Haiku # 76203, December 7, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by vince
Yesiree Bob! (burp)
It must have been the seltzer
that it was drinking.
Haiku # 76202, December 6, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by Done Drunk Itself Dry of Lost Continent
SOME Cavendish. Damn.
Missed a syllababobble.
Harder than it seems...
Haiku # 76201, December 6, 2022 10:59 pm ET
by The Lost Syllable of Atlantis
Got me a corncob.
Packed it with Cavendish.
Smoking like Heaven!
Haiku # 76200, December 6, 2022 10:57 pm ET
by Prepare for Darth's Response full of Disgusting Ass Ociations
Balenciaga
Hooked up with Lady Gaga
(that Baba Yaga)
Haiku # 76199, December 6, 2022 1:57 pm ET
by Baby in Bondage Gear of SHocKthe BouRgeOisie
Cathedral ceiling
I see Ceiling Cat up there
And He’s watching you
Haiku # 76198, December 5, 2022 6:05 am ET
by All Seeing Eye of Doofus
cathedral ceiling
sheltering us from the bombs
will thy be our tomb?
Haiku # 76197, December 5, 2022 12:11 am ET
by vince
Zhey/Zhem/Zhusicles.
No more Mom and Popsicles...
Bomb-pops now outlawed.
Haiku # 76195, December 3, 2022 5:49 am ET
by Ice-assicles of Trans Nanny State
Buttocks stalactites
You cant ride your bicycle
with ass icicles
Haiku # 76194, December 3, 2022 12:52 am ET
by Spike
Darth Caveman, poet
Tending my aging blue cheese
Twat waffle storage
Haiku # 76193, December 3, 2022 12:47 am ET
by Caveman & Maths Whiz of Cave
Haiku defeats tech.
Haiku prevails, in the end.
Haiku in the cave.
Haiku # 76192, December 2, 2022 9:28 pm ET
by Troglodyte of Future Nostalgia
That drunk waiter: dead.
Fresh on the table: his head.
Head waiter: "They're fed !"
Haiku # 76191, November 30, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Waitress of Leave a Big Tip and Exit Quickly
That dinner party
At the head of the table
Our old friend, Grimace
Haiku # 76189, November 30, 2022 4:39 am ET
by Drunken Waiter of The Party
We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.
Haiku # 76188, November 29, 2022 11:49 pm ET
by Cryptography of Sexography
Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's
Haiku # 76187, November 29, 2022 7:26 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.
Haiku # 76186, November 28, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Jean-Luc Epstein
Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills
Haiku # 76185, November 28, 2022 1:15 pm ET
by Vhs of Happy holidays to you
the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately
Haiku # 76184, November 28, 2022 6:10 am ET
by ash of special relativity
Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.
Haiku # 76183, November 27, 2022 4:10 pm ET
by Counting Down to the Day of Haiku-mass
Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'
Haiku # 76181, November 25, 2022 10:24 am ET
by Janis of Sloosha's Crossin'
brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.
Haiku # 76172, November 19, 2022 1:40 pm ET
by Naïve Internaut of Juggernaut
Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar
Haiku # 76171, November 19, 2022 3:41 am ET
by Bob Vila of This Stinky Old House
Why was Canaan cursed?
Will the REAL Jews please stand up ?
Japeth are Shemites?
Haiku # 76168, November 15, 2022 6:37 pm ET
by Bible School of Reading Genesis on Crack
You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!
Haiku # 76165, November 13, 2022 10:09 pm ET
by Scatological Analyses of Eschatology
Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!
Haiku # 76164, November 11, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Ann I. Helped of Shake And Bake
You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...
Haiku # 76163, November 11, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Haiku Solidarity of Klownworld
totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus
Haiku # 76162, November 11, 2022 7:51 pm ET
by ash of antipyretic sensibility
Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?
Haiku # 76161, November 11, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Salute of Backend
antipodean
inverted defecation
is moving on up
Haiku # 76160, November 11, 2022 2:06 am ET
by ash of shit , yeah!
How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.
Haiku # 76159, November 10, 2022 9:53 pm ET
by Rusty McPherson of Tokugawa Bridge in Moonlight
How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds
Haiku # 76157, November 9, 2022 9:58 am ET
by 300000 volunteers can't be wrong
Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.
Haiku # 76156, November 8, 2022 3:51 pm ET
by Glenndert's Mother of Danzig New Jersey (haikuized 4 U)
Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely
Haiku # 76155, November 8, 2022 8:24 am ET
by Glenndrert of Germany
Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.
Haiku # 76154, November 8, 2022 8:22 am ET
by Candidato of Sindicato
Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid
Haiku # 76151, November 6, 2022 4:08 pm ET
by Wuhan of CCP Bio-weapons Lunchbox
Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.
Haiku # 76150, November 6, 2022 4:05 pm ET
by World Health Organism of Lies
If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?
Haiku # 76146, November 5, 2022 11:36 am ET
by Clog of Vegemite
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