Darth Caveman, poet
Tending my aging blue cheese
Twat waffle storage

Haiku defeats tech.
Haiku prevails, in the end.
Haiku in the cave.

That drunk waiter: dead.
Fresh on the table: his head.
Head waiter: "They're fed !"

That dinner party
At the head of the table
Our old friend, Grimace

We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.

Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's

Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.

Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills

the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately

Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.

Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'

brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more

invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction

Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.

26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen

ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang

Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.

Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.

Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar

You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!

Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!

You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...

totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus

Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?

antipodean
inverted defecation
is moving on up

How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.

How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds

Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.

Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely

Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.

Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid

Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.

If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?

Hooz fartz u sniffin?
Lord Fartsniffer sniffs his own.
They all smell like cheese.

First, Cassowary.
Next, Lord Fartsniffer's mother.
Then we come for YOU.

I am RIGHT HERE. Now.
That is called "being present".
Where the fuck are you?

Where are you?

The world won't improve...
Always intensifying,
It gets worse and worse.

You talking to me?
Have you noticed my pig jowls?
Never mind my hair.

free speech costs a lot
did elon save on his hair ?
neither's a bargain

Stan has lost all shame
He reads his haikus on air
He should stick to jazz

since their zeitgeist dream
political bedfellows
all woke together

clouds finally cede
to psychedelic azure
of a sydney spring

Your mind is RIGHT THERE:
Inside a Blue Whale's butthole.
Stay right where you are.

A blue whale's fart bubble is large enough to hold a horse.

Darth has a tantrum.
He screams and belches haiku.
Darth, honey, calm down.

Soup and potatoes
I throw them at your haikus
But you will write more

perspiration (sweat)
all aboard a train of slobs
(Dirty underwear)

farts in the firebox
despite a head of cabbage
it's just blowing smoke

perseveration
all aboard a train of thought
but going nowhere

coke in the firebox
despite a full head of steam
it's just blowing smoke

First there comes the flesh.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Longpig casserole