Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 157 Days and 77035 Haiku later...

We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.
Haiku # 76188, November 29, 2022 11:49 pm ET
by Cryptography of Sexography
Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's
Haiku # 76187, November 29, 2022 7:26 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.
Haiku # 76186, November 28, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Jean-Luc Epstein
Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills
Haiku # 76185, November 28, 2022 1:15 pm ET
by Vhs of Happy holidays to you
the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately
Haiku # 76184, November 28, 2022 6:10 am ET
by ash of special relativity
Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.
Haiku # 76183, November 27, 2022 4:10 pm ET
by Counting Down to the Day of Haiku-mass
Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'
Haiku # 76181, November 25, 2022 10:24 am ET
by Janis of Sloosha's Crossin'
brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.
Haiku # 76172, November 19, 2022 1:40 pm ET
by Naïve Internaut of Juggernaut
Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar
Haiku # 76171, November 19, 2022 3:41 am ET
by Bob Vila of This Stinky Old House
Why was Canaan cursed?
Will the REAL Jews please stand up ?
Japeth are Shemites?
Haiku # 76168, November 15, 2022 6:37 pm ET
by Bible School of Reading Genesis on Crack
You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!
Haiku # 76165, November 13, 2022 10:09 pm ET
by Scatological Analyses of Eschatology
Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!
Haiku # 76164, November 11, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Ann I. Helped of Shake And Bake
You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...
Haiku # 76163, November 11, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Haiku Solidarity of Klownworld
totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus
Haiku # 76162, November 11, 2022 7:51 pm ET
by ash of antipyretic sensibility
Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?
Haiku # 76161, November 11, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Salute of Backend
antipodean
inverted defecation
is moving on up
Haiku # 76160, November 11, 2022 2:06 am ET
by ash of shit , yeah!
How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.
Haiku # 76159, November 10, 2022 9:53 pm ET
by Rusty McPherson of Tokugawa Bridge in Moonlight
How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds
Haiku # 76157, November 9, 2022 9:58 am ET
by 300000 volunteers can't be wrong
Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.
Haiku # 76156, November 8, 2022 3:51 pm ET
by Glenndert's Mother of Danzig New Jersey (haikuized 4 U)
Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely
Haiku # 76155, November 8, 2022 8:24 am ET
by Glenndrert of Germany
Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.
Haiku # 76154, November 8, 2022 8:22 am ET
by Candidato of Sindicato
Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid
Haiku # 76151, November 6, 2022 4:08 pm ET
by Wuhan of CCP Bio-weapons Lunchbox
Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.
Haiku # 76150, November 6, 2022 4:05 pm ET
by World Health Organism of Lies
If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?
Haiku # 76146, November 5, 2022 11:36 am ET
by Clog of Vegemite
Hooz fartz u sniffin?
Lord Fartsniffer sniffs his own.
They all smell like cheese.
Haiku # 76145, November 5, 2022 11:31 am ET
by The Wonder of Microbes
First, Cassowary.
Next, Lord Fartsniffer's mother.
Then we come for YOU.
Haiku # 76144, November 5, 2022 7:54 am ET
by Haiku Death Squad of Poetic Intimidation
I am RIGHT HERE. Now.
That is called "being present".
Where the fuck are you?
Haiku # 76141, November 4, 2022 5:51 pm ET
by Omnipresence of Memory
Where are you?
Haiku # 76140, November 4, 2022 2:54 am ET
by Luca McDonell of a point or extent in space
The world won't improve...
Always intensifying,
It gets worse and worse.
Haiku # 76139, November 3, 2022 10:08 pm ET
by Entropy of Empathy
You talking to me?
Have you noticed my pig jowls?
Never mind my hair.
Haiku # 76138, November 2, 2022 9:16 am ET
by Elon(gpig) Musk of Great Clips
free speech costs a lot
did elon save on his hair ?
neither's a bargain
Haiku # 76137, November 2, 2022 4:37 am ET
by ash of pieces at any price
Stan has lost all shame
He reads his haikus on air
He should stick to jazz
Haiku # 76135, October 30, 2022 7:17 pm ET
by Pabs of Canada
since their zeitgeist dream
political bedfellows
all woke together
Haiku # 76133, October 29, 2022 10:03 pm ET
by ash of inadequate sedation
clouds finally cede
to psychedelic azure
of a sydney spring
Haiku # 76132, October 29, 2022 4:16 am ET
by ash of things are looking up
Your mind is RIGHT THERE:
Inside a Blue Whale's butthole.
Stay right where you are.
Haiku # 76131, October 28, 2022 5:35 pm ET
by Leviathan of the Seven Seas
A blue whale's fart bubble is large enough to hold a horse.
Haiku # 76130, October 27, 2022 6:02 am ET
by Stable of Flatulence
Darth has a tantrum.
He screams and belches haiku.
Darth, honey, calm down.
Haiku # 76129, October 26, 2022 6:36 am ET
by Triggered Fig of Figured Trig
Soup and potatoes
I throw them at your haikus
But you will write more
Haiku # 76128, October 25, 2022 3:53 pm ET
by Waster of Food
perspiration (sweat)
all aboard a train of slobs
(Dirty underwear)

farts in the firebox
despite a head of cabbage
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76127, October 25, 2022 12:15 pm ET
by Charred remains of Poopstains
perseveration
all aboard a train of thought
but going nowhere

coke in the firebox
despite a full head of steam
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76126, October 25, 2022 8:18 am ET
by ash of do the locomotion
First there comes the flesh.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Longpig casserole
Haiku # 76125, October 25, 2022 5:34 am ET
by You were of What I just ate
First there comes the flush.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Poetry sewer
Haiku # 76124, October 25, 2022 5:32 am ET
by Stench of Poetry reading ( on the toilet)
First there comes the flash.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Haiku volcano
Haiku # 76123, October 25, 2022 4:26 am ET
by Cloaca of Poetry
First there comes the flash.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
And then comes the ass.
Haiku # 76122, October 25, 2022 4:21 am ET
by Exhibitionist of Corner of Lewd & Lascivious
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