Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 243 Days and 77168 Haiku later...

brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.
Haiku # 76172, November 19, 2022 1:40 pm ET
by Naïve Internaut of Juggernaut
Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar
Haiku # 76171, November 19, 2022 3:41 am ET
by Bob Vila of This Stinky Old House
Why was Canaan cursed?
Will the REAL Jews please stand up ?
Japeth are Shemites?
Haiku # 76168, November 15, 2022 6:37 pm ET
by Bible School of Reading Genesis on Crack
You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!
Haiku # 76165, November 13, 2022 10:09 pm ET
by Scatological Analyses of Eschatology
Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!
Haiku # 76164, November 11, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Ann I. Helped of Shake And Bake
You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...
Haiku # 76163, November 11, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Haiku Solidarity of Klownworld
totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus
Haiku # 76162, November 11, 2022 7:51 pm ET
by ash of antipyretic sensibility
Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?
Haiku # 76161, November 11, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Salute of Backend
inverted defecation
is moving on up
Haiku # 76160, November 11, 2022 2:06 am ET
by ash of shit , yeah!
How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.
Haiku # 76159, November 10, 2022 9:53 pm ET
by Rusty McPherson of Tokugawa Bridge in Moonlight
How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds
Haiku # 76157, November 9, 2022 9:58 am ET
by 300000 volunteers can't be wrong
Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.
Haiku # 76156, November 8, 2022 3:51 pm ET
by Glenndert's Mother of Danzig New Jersey (haikuized 4 U)
Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely
Haiku # 76155, November 8, 2022 8:24 am ET
by Glenndrert of Germany
Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.
Haiku # 76154, November 8, 2022 8:22 am ET
by Candidato of Sindicato
Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid
Haiku # 76151, November 6, 2022 4:08 pm ET
by Wuhan of CCP Bio-weapons Lunchbox
Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.
Haiku # 76150, November 6, 2022 4:05 pm ET
by World Health Organism of Lies
If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?
Haiku # 76146, November 5, 2022 11:36 am ET
by Clog of Vegemite
Hooz fartz u sniffin?
Lord Fartsniffer sniffs his own.
They all smell like cheese.
Haiku # 76145, November 5, 2022 11:31 am ET
by The Wonder of Microbes
First, Cassowary.
Next, Lord Fartsniffer's mother.
Then we come for YOU.
Haiku # 76144, November 5, 2022 7:54 am ET
by Haiku Death Squad of Poetic Intimidation
That is called "being present".
Where the fuck are you?
Haiku # 76141, November 4, 2022 5:51 pm ET
by Omnipresence of Memory
Where are you?
Haiku # 76140, November 4, 2022 2:54 am ET
by Luca McDonell of a point or extent in space
The world won't improve...
Always intensifying,
It gets worse and worse.
Haiku # 76139, November 3, 2022 10:08 pm ET
by Entropy of Empathy
You talking to me?
Have you noticed my pig jowls?
Never mind my hair.
Haiku # 76138, November 2, 2022 9:16 am ET
by Elon(gpig) Musk of Great Clips
free speech costs a lot
did elon save on his hair ?
neither's a bargain
Haiku # 76137, November 2, 2022 4:37 am ET
by ash of pieces at any price
Stan has lost all shame
He reads his haikus on air
He should stick to jazz
Haiku # 76135, October 30, 2022 7:17 pm ET
by Pabs of Canada
since their zeitgeist dream
political bedfellows
all woke together
Haiku # 76133, October 29, 2022 10:03 pm ET
by ash of inadequate sedation
clouds finally cede
to psychedelic azure
of a sydney spring
Haiku # 76132, October 29, 2022 4:16 am ET
by ash of things are looking up
Your mind is RIGHT THERE:
Inside a Blue Whale's butthole.
Stay right where you are.
Haiku # 76131, October 28, 2022 5:35 pm ET
by Leviathan of the Seven Seas
A blue whale's fart bubble is large enough to hold a horse.
Haiku # 76130, October 27, 2022 6:02 am ET
by Stable of Flatulence
Darth has a tantrum.
He screams and belches haiku.
Darth, honey, calm down.
Haiku # 76129, October 26, 2022 6:36 am ET
by Triggered Fig of Figured Trig
Soup and potatoes
I throw them at your haikus
But you will write more
Haiku # 76128, October 25, 2022 3:53 pm ET
by Waster of Food
perspiration (sweat)
all aboard a train of slobs
(Dirty underwear)

farts in the firebox
despite a head of cabbage
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76127, October 25, 2022 12:15 pm ET
by Charred remains of Poopstains
all aboard a train of thought
but going nowhere

coke in the firebox
despite a full head of steam
it's just blowing smoke
Haiku # 76126, October 25, 2022 8:18 am ET
by ash of do the locomotion
First there comes the flesh.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Longpig casserole
Haiku # 76125, October 25, 2022 5:34 am ET
by You were of What I just ate
First there comes the flush.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Poetry sewer
Haiku # 76124, October 25, 2022 5:32 am ET
by Stench of Poetry reading ( on the toilet)
First there comes the flash.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
Haiku volcano
Haiku # 76123, October 25, 2022 4:26 am ET
by Cloaca of Poetry
First there comes the flash.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
And then comes the ass.
Haiku # 76122, October 25, 2022 4:21 am ET
by Exhibitionist of Corner of Lewd & Lascivious
No, that’s Starkitten
I know Darth’s sign is Balut
His rising sign’s Cheese
Haiku # 76121, October 24, 2022 3:28 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Hey, that's a good sign.
Darth is a librarian
Revealing himself.
Haiku # 76120, October 24, 2022 6:32 am ET
by Probably to People in the Adult Fiction Shelves
nah, i'm a libran
revealing myself as one
who procrastinates
Haiku # 76119, October 23, 2022 5:50 pm ET
by ash of past tense, presently chill
Well ash is a scorp
Too, as old moxie was and
Is, been a long time
Haiku # 76118, October 23, 2022 2:44 pm ET
by Mox
First there comes the flash.
You think: "what the F--- was that?"
And then comes the ash.
Haiku # 76117, October 23, 2022 2:02 pm ET
by Blinding Flash of Explosion
birthday's enigma
can i keep getting older
without growing up
Haiku # 76116, October 23, 2022 7:57 am ET
by ash of many orbits of sol
The NEW Swedish Un-cola.
Drink some today, simp.
Haiku # 76115, October 23, 2022 5:47 am ET
by 70s Ad Campaign of Dumb Amurkins
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