Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 80 Days and 76272 Haiku later...

Limericks are better
Short and sweet, they make me laugh
Haikus can suck it
Haiku # 76207, December 10, 2022 10:51 pm ET
by Janis of ChatGPT "Write a parody haiku"
She are a fatface.
She sure am talking trash, y'all.
But she have tenure.
Haiku # 76206, December 9, 2022 9:47 pm ET
by White Folx R da BOMB of Un Huh
To shit: shitted, shat...
The tenses are limited
As regards haiku...
Haiku # 76205, December 9, 2022 9:21 pm ET
by Wm. Shatner of Darth Fig-something
Here’s one more! He shat.
Rinsing off with the bidet…
Another haiku
Haiku # 76204, December 8, 2022 2:17 am ET
by Poet of Latrine
“uno mas”, he spat
picking himself off the mat
eyes pierce through raised gloves
Haiku # 76203, December 7, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by vince
Yesiree Bob! (burp)
It must have been the seltzer
that it was drinking.
Haiku # 76202, December 6, 2022 11:03 pm ET
by Done Drunk Itself Dry of Lost Continent
SOME Cavendish. Damn.
Missed a syllababobble.
Harder than it seems...
Haiku # 76201, December 6, 2022 10:59 pm ET
by The Lost Syllable of Atlantis
Got me a corncob.
Packed it with Cavendish.
Smoking like Heaven!
Haiku # 76200, December 6, 2022 10:57 pm ET
by Prepare for Darth's Response full of Disgusting Ass Ociations
Balenciaga
Hooked up with Lady Gaga
(that Baba Yaga)
Haiku # 76199, December 6, 2022 1:57 pm ET
by Baby in Bondage Gear of SHocKthe BouRgeOisie
Cathedral ceiling
I see Ceiling Cat up there
And He’s watching you
Haiku # 76198, December 5, 2022 6:05 am ET
by All Seeing Eye of Doofus
cathedral ceiling
sheltering us from the bombs
will thy be our tomb?
Haiku # 76197, December 5, 2022 12:11 am ET
by vince
Zhey/Zhem/Zhusicles.
No more Mom and Popsicles...
Bomb-pops now outlawed.
Haiku # 76195, December 3, 2022 5:49 am ET
by Ice-assicles of Trans Nanny State
Buttocks stalactites
You cant ride your bicycle
with ass icicles
Haiku # 76194, December 3, 2022 12:52 am ET
by Spike
Darth Caveman, poet
Tending my aging blue cheese
Twat waffle storage
Haiku # 76193, December 3, 2022 12:47 am ET
by Caveman & Maths Whiz of Cave
Haiku defeats tech.
Haiku prevails, in the end.
Haiku in the cave.
Haiku # 76192, December 2, 2022 9:28 pm ET
by Troglodyte of Future Nostalgia
That drunk waiter: dead.
Fresh on the table: his head.
Head waiter: "They're fed !"
Haiku # 76191, November 30, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Waitress of Leave a Big Tip and Exit Quickly
That dinner party
At the head of the table
Our old friend, Grimace
Haiku # 76189, November 30, 2022 4:39 am ET
by Drunken Waiter of The Party
We know who "Nick" is.
And it's not like we don't know
"McDonalds" is code.
Haiku # 76188, November 29, 2022 11:49 pm ET
by Cryptography of Sexography
Nick is a nice guy
Had him over for dinner
We ate McDonald's
Haiku # 76187, November 29, 2022 7:26 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Global pizza pie:
You want for here or to go?
Try a slice on me.
Haiku # 76186, November 28, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Jean-Luc Epstein
Suffering also
Includes in laws, hangovers
And medical bills
Haiku # 76185, November 28, 2022 1:15 pm ET
by Vhs of Happy holidays to you
the older i get
the more i don't remember
what happened lately
Haiku # 76184, November 28, 2022 6:10 am ET
by ash of special relativity
Oh ye syllables
Golden haiku syllables
Syllababobbles.
Haiku # 76183, November 27, 2022 4:10 pm ET
by Counting Down to the Day of Haiku-mass
Reading Cloud Atlas;
Had an 'mazement about smart
in school'ry learnin'
Haiku # 76181, November 25, 2022 10:24 am ET
by Janis of Sloosha's Crossin'
brief mortality
is like getting the munchies
you'll be back for more
Haiku # 76180, November 24, 2022 7:35 am ET
by ash of of samsara unlimited
invest in our burn
there will never be enough
for satisfaction
Haiku # 76179, November 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by ash of rastafarian hyper tokin'
Janis we love you
Whoever that "you" might be.
Keep on keeping on.
Haiku # 76176, November 23, 2022 8:58 am ET
by Respect From All Three of Us at Bad Haiku
26 years of
curating this collection;
the things I have seen
Haiku # 76175, November 22, 2022 11:07 am ET
by Janis of reCapcha is a defeated technology
ah, seventies rock
look out for that badfinger
wang dang sweet poontang
Haiku # 76174, November 22, 2022 7:23 am ET
by ash of ted nugent's cat minder
Have you heard FANNY?
Those women could really rock.
They deserve their crowns.
Haiku # 76173, November 19, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by 70s Fem-rock of Google It
Oh, I'm so happy
to find this haiku website.
Let the poems rise.
Haiku # 76172, November 19, 2022 1:40 pm ET
by Naïve Internaut of Juggernaut
Sneaking a Christmas kiss
He’s stinking up your chimney!
That’s the Turd Burglar
Haiku # 76171, November 19, 2022 3:41 am ET
by Bob Vila of This Stinky Old House
Why was Canaan cursed?
Will the REAL Jews please stand up ?
Japeth are Shemites?
Haiku # 76168, November 15, 2022 6:37 pm ET
by Bible School of Reading Genesis on Crack
You are what you think...
You also eat what you think.
Eat your own haiku!
Haiku # 76165, November 13, 2022 10:09 pm ET
by Scatological Analyses of Eschatology
Time for turd burgers
Sit bare ass on hot burner(s)
Ring the dinner bell!
Haiku # 76164, November 11, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Ann I. Helped of Shake And Bake
You're a good gaia.
A thinkah from Down Undah.
Southern perspective...
Haiku # 76163, November 11, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Haiku Solidarity of Klownworld
totally uncool
giving gaia a fever
we are the virus
Haiku # 76162, November 11, 2022 7:51 pm ET
by ash of antipyretic sensibility
Howz about longpig?
Howz about Darth Figpucker?
Fig for your thoughts?
Haiku # 76161, November 11, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Salute of Backend
antipodean
inverted defecation
is moving on up
Haiku # 76160, November 11, 2022 2:06 am ET
by ash of shit , yeah!
How 'bout them haikus?
Kickin' ASS and takin' NAMES
. . . just like Basho done.
Haiku # 76159, November 10, 2022 9:53 pm ET
by Rusty McPherson of Tokugawa Bridge in Moonlight
How 'bout them Ruskies?
The war is not going well...
And no McDonalds
Haiku # 76157, November 9, 2022 9:58 am ET
by 300000 volunteers can't be wrong
Address the process
Outcomes become more likely.
Outcome-based drivel.
Haiku # 76156, November 8, 2022 3:51 pm ET
by Glenndert's Mother of Danzig New Jersey (haikuized 4 U)
Address the process rather than the outcome. Then, the outcome becomes more likely
Haiku # 76155, November 8, 2022 8:24 am ET
by Glenndrert of Germany
Yo fui a botar.
Yo encontré basura.
Luego la boté.
Haiku # 76154, November 8, 2022 8:22 am ET
by Candidato of Sindicato
Go get more boosters.
You need new every three weeks
To cure your stupid
Haiku # 76151, November 6, 2022 4:08 pm ET
by Wuhan of CCP Bio-weapons Lunchbox
Ka Ching of Wuhan.
I scribed my immortal verse
But you did not like.
Haiku # 76150, November 6, 2022 4:05 pm ET
by World Health Organism of Lies
If the world is round
Do people in Australia
go poop upside down?
Haiku # 76146, November 5, 2022 11:36 am ET
by Clog of Vegemite
Hooz fartz u sniffin?
Lord Fartsniffer sniffs his own.
They all smell like cheese.
Haiku # 76145, November 5, 2022 11:31 am ET
by The Wonder of Microbes
First, Cassowary.
Next, Lord Fartsniffer's mother.
Then we come for YOU.
Haiku # 76144, November 5, 2022 7:54 am ET
by Haiku Death Squad of Poetic Intimidation
I am RIGHT HERE. Now.
That is called "being present".
Where the fuck are you?
Haiku # 76141, November 4, 2022 5:51 pm ET
by Omnipresence of Memory
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