Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 64 Days and 78028 Haiku later...

They scream and destroy
because they want ABORTION.
So they are guilty.
Haiku # 75817 June 22, 2022 6:34 pm ET
by As Charged
So sorry comrade
The war is not going well
But soon, we head east
Haiku # 75816 June 22, 2022 5:46 pm ET
by Russian "volunteer" of Looking for food
January sixth
Was worse than the holocaust.
And it was Trump's fault!
Haiku # 75814 June 21, 2022 2:24 pm ET
by Jared Kushner of Holy Mt. Zion
Klaus Schwab is a dolt.
His re-set is really dumb.
He is so stupid.
Haiku # 75813 June 20, 2022 4:27 pm ET
by Globalist Leaders are Actually Not Smart of But You Are
Now you’re laying there
You let the murderer in
Roomba Class Action
Haiku # 75811 June 20, 2022 11:22 am ET
by Ophelia Queefe ( poet in residence) of The Law Offices of Cuntfart, Cuntfart, and Cunt
Cartier bracelet
You said you’d buy it for me
Cheap Darth Figpucker !!
Haiku # 75810 June 20, 2022 10:17 am ET
by Haiku Honey of Hive
This activity
involves millions of microbes
Now you’re making cheese
Haiku # 75809 June 20, 2022 10:05 am ET
by The Rat of Rathskeller
Politely declined:
Your offer of Camembert...
It was too runny.
Haiku # 75808 June 20, 2022 6:05 am ET
by Fine Cheeses of Fifth Drink
After the fifth drink
he confessed his fantasies:
“I want to fuck cheese.”
Haiku # 75807 June 20, 2022 3:32 am ET
by Drunk of Again
The Big (pussy) cat
Must go home and lick his wounds
Florida Hockey!
Haiku # 75805 June 18, 2022 11:37 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hey Bible Boyfriend
I'm here at the museum
Tired of this shit
Haiku # 75803 June 18, 2022 11:13 am ET
by Cyan of SLTX
White Antarctica!
Muhammadiyah lies there,
covered in deep ice.
Haiku # 75802 June 16, 2022 10:46 am ET
by Guy with funny Beard and Holy Book of South Pole
You wanna get high?
Try Old Willow high test Ku(sh)
The sh’s silent
Haiku # 75800 June 15, 2022 3:34 am ET
by High Kookaburra of Gum Tree
Add a "ku" on there,
SharonGlymn, you guinea pig.
Then you get "haiku"
Haiku # 75799 June 14, 2022 10:35 pm ET
by You Sexy Software, You
hi
Haiku # 75798 June 14, 2022 6:14 pm ET
by SharonGlymn of Equatorial Guinea
You’ll earn more money
delivering newspapers
than writing haiku
Haiku # 75797 June 14, 2022 1:44 am ET
by Matsuo Basho’s Mother of (Channeled) Thanks, Shirley MacLaine
Lap of Luxury
At Home with Darth Figpucker
Unlimited Cheese
Haiku # 75796 June 13, 2022 9:19 pm ET
by Better Haiku and Gardens of Newsstand
Oh woe, woe is me.
My life has become haiku;
Haiku tragedy.
Haiku # 75795 June 13, 2022 4:31 pm ET
by Comedy of Tragic Haiku
I’ll pay the postage
Send me your slapped mosquitoes
I’m not a vampire
Haiku # 75794 June 13, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by Bugsy of Transylvania
I liked your haiku
In fact, I liked it so much
I bought the company
Haiku # 75793 June 13, 2022 2:01 pm ET
by One Syllable (toke) of Over the line
Hope no employer
ever finds my bad haiku
unless they love it.
Haiku # 75791 June 13, 2022 9:04 am ET
by Human Haiku Resources of Haiku Hiring Inc.
Leave you to yourself
You smear poo haiku on walls
Then complain of smell
Haiku # 75790 June 12, 2022 9:49 pm ET
by MONARCH
Insomnia King
Consider a sledgehammer
Go, knock yourself out
Haiku # 75789 June 11, 2022 6:46 am ET
by Lee Harvey Oddball of Book Nook
Caffeine nostalgia anger
Melatonin restlessness
Lonely sleep repeat
Haiku # 75788 June 10, 2022 9:04 pm ET
by MONARCH
It's 1997
a web of idealists
no spam to be found
Haiku # 75787 June 10, 2022 3:16 pm ET
by Looking back of In the past
His bowel movements
also broke world’s records
Now you’re in second
Haiku # 75786 June 10, 2022 2:41 pm ET
by You (#2) of 2nd Place
I don't believe you.
How could he eat all of that?
I can't swallow it.
Haiku # 75785 June 9, 2022 3:14 pm ET
by Eric Swallowell of Langley, VA
Michel Lotito
List of unusual items consumed


At least:[12][8][3]

18 bicycles
15 shopping carts
7 TV sets
6 chandeliers
2 beds
1 pair of skis
1 computer
1 Cessna 150 light aircraft
1 waterbed
500 metres (1,600 ft) of steel chain at once
1 coffin (with handles)
1 Guinness award plaque
45 door hinges
Haiku # 75784 June 9, 2022 12:05 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Michael Lotito
craved funny things to eat-o!
18 bicycles
Haiku # 75783 June 9, 2022 11:56 am ET
by Pain of Schwinntestines
A caricature
Of the mightiest nation
Forgetful of why
Haiku # 75782 June 9, 2022 10:49 am ET
by 18 USC of 2381
How you like Brandon?
High prices, starting new wars . . .
I am not impressed.
Haiku # 75781 June 9, 2022 8:50 am ET
by Vladimir P. of Arkangelsk
Run away from home
Pack up all your syllables
You haiku hobo
Haiku # 75780 June 8, 2022 10:30 pm ET
by Celestial Counselor of The Ethers
So go on home then.
Go home with Darth Figpucker.
He'll take care of you.
Haiku # 75779 June 8, 2022 6:19 pm ET
by Cyanara of C U Later
What is the downside?
What do people do for fun?
I wanna go home
Haiku # 75778 June 8, 2022 12:17 pm ET
by Cyan of Home
Ugh. It's you again.
Porn-site Eugene, from Russia.
Well your haiku SUCKS.
Haiku # 75777 June 7, 2022 8:10 pm ET
by Y tampoco eres dominicano, tonto
Quran is its name.
Got real mad in South Philly.
Its name is "Quran"
Haiku # 75775 June 7, 2022 5:36 am ET
by And a Cheese Steak Over Here of Brotherly Love
Salvador Ramos
Had a terribly bad day
Hence, an armed tantrum.
Haiku # 75774 June 7, 2022 4:16 am ET
by Stupid Law Enforcement May As Well Have Given Him ANOTHER Hour
If you ever get
sweaty balls at the golf course
use the ball washer
Haiku # 75773 June 7, 2022 2:23 am ET
by Arnold “Harry” Palmer of 19th Green
Up in the window
Is that Anthony Perkins
or Darth Figpucker?
Haiku # 75772 June 7, 2022 2:20 am ET
by Noticer of Details
Headless conjoined twin
Our pronouns are What. The. F@ck.
Mother liked you best
Haiku # 75771 June 7, 2022 1:13 am ET
by Tired of 4 legged pants
You’re on the menu
Self cannibalizing snake
Ssssssssss…one last selfie
Haiku # 75770 June 6, 2022 7:42 pm ET
by S.C. Snake of Gone
crying sobbing floor pissing everywhere I bet, maybe even shit
Haiku # 75769 June 6, 2022 4:28 pm ET
by mcdoodly of the farm
actual haiku
the way the net used to be
ironic and free
Haiku # 75768 June 6, 2022 2:06 pm ET
by vhs
Here comes the white lady.
Let's tell her some more bullshit...
Then she'll give us stuff.
Haiku # 75767 June 6, 2022 1:09 pm ET
by Giggling Natives of Oceania
"I must sacrifice
ALL for anthropology"
Dusk. Rustling palm-fronds...
Haiku # 75766 June 6, 2022 1:04 pm ET
by Ongoing Saga of Margie and The Doctor
Oh please Gregory--
At least leave me a hammock
And some potted meat...
Haiku # 75765 June 6, 2022 12:57 pm ET
by Margaret Bateson of Stranded in Samoa
Big doctor return.
Him come back soon soon from sky:
high-high silver bird!
Haiku # 75764 June 6, 2022 12:47 pm ET
by Cargo-cult of Dr. G. Bateson 1947
Doctor Bateson say:
"Fiki fiki pa Covid.
Sabi no Covid"
Haiku # 75763 June 6, 2022 12:37 pm ET
by Systemic Analyses of Boredom
Hello Crazy World!
I’m worried about Covid
I have a sore throat
Haiku # 75762 June 6, 2022 6:03 am ET
by Cyan of Here
You are five my fuck
shit ass little fucker man
who hair cash ringer?!
Haiku # 75761 June 6, 2022 1:39 am ET
by Linyah of USA
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >