Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 325 Days and 77298 Haiku later...

I miss him because
I made some bad decisions
He broke up with me
Haiku # 74876, February 14, 2022 8:15 am ET
by Cyan is tired of acting like she’s fine
ever wonder why
good people suffer - not I
Jesus said fuck ‘em
Haiku # 74875, February 14, 2022 6:53 am ET
by Other apostle of Sometimes he was grumpy
underneath the cross
a three legged dog lay flat
jesus didn’t budge
Haiku # 74874, February 14, 2022 6:52 am ET
by other apostle of Golgotha holiday inn
You will get him back.
With help from God's assassin.
Dead men are faithful.
Haiku # 74873, February 14, 2022 5:25 am ET
by Necromongers!!!! of HU-AH!!!!
Okay I will play,
Why do you miss your boyfriend?
Let us not pretend
Haiku # 74872, February 14, 2022 3:14 am ET
by Easy to offend
I know your mother
She says you should go to sleep
The muffin is moist
Haiku # 74871, February 14, 2022 3:09 am ET
by Trans in dental
Yeah, who dat ate shat
I will ball your foot soonly
Aged babboonly
Haiku # 74870, February 14, 2022 2:05 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Baby cosmetics
Because ugly kids are food
Lock up your mother
Haiku # 74869, February 14, 2022 2:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I think that, sadly
I might be in love with you
I’ll evaporate
Haiku # 74868, February 13, 2022 11:33 pm ET
by You make me sick of life
Disney Princesses
Happily Ever After
And other lies told
Haiku # 74867, February 13, 2022 9:56 pm ET
by Cyan of I’m still here
Urghh ulppp now I puke,
Filling your mind with my verse.
Can you smell it yet?
Haiku # 74866, February 13, 2022 6:18 pm ET
by That Old Fragrance of Haiku
A broken record
Again and again I say,
“I miss my boyfriend”
Haiku # 74865, February 13, 2022 11:08 am ET
by Cyan is lonely and full of Longing
Psychic paper guy!
Ooh Doctor, you *soniced* her
Sexy River Song
Haiku # 74864, February 12, 2022 9:10 pm ET
by Cyan is a total nerd and will always have a love of Doctor Who
Your "science" is shit.
So go ahead. Censor me.
You must repent now.
Haiku # 74863, February 12, 2022 9:01 pm ET
by The Holy Spirit
Yup, I trust science
Much more reliable than
Some anti vax dumbshit
Haiku # 74862, February 12, 2022 8:58 pm ET
by Satan herself
You need more than three.
Three doses is not enough.
You need MORE boosters.
Haiku # 74861, February 12, 2022 8:52 pm ET
by Cause Satan Sez So
I'm calling on God
While working at the psych ward
with an assassin.
Haiku # 74860, February 12, 2022 5:41 pm ET
by Can't Say More But He Is Friendly
I am so tired
I feel cheated and worn down
What are y’all doing?
Haiku # 74859, February 12, 2022 3:38 pm ET
by Cyan is tired of Life
Medical tyrants.
They're being paid to kill you.
Don't trust the "science".
Haiku # 74858, February 12, 2022 2:51 pm ET
by Skepticism is now Illegal
Let it now be known:
I have become a Muslim.
I, Darth Figpucker.
Haiku # 74857, February 12, 2022 1:41 pm ET
by Starkitten of Glaswegian Library
If Cyan is Darth,
we need to know about it.
Form a committee.
Haiku # 74856, February 12, 2022 1:29 pm ET
by Scientific Method of Darth Fig-something
Boston M of S?
As a kid I loved that place.
But science has died.
Haiku # 74855, February 12, 2022 1:24 pm ET
by Bwawston Rawx of Go Sawx
I’m hardly working
There are so many darn kids
Science Museum
Haiku # 74854, February 12, 2022 11:50 am ET
by Cyan who is wasting company time and not thinking of the consequences
Torturing myself
Looking at old photographs
I should just move on
Haiku # 74853, February 12, 2022 11:27 am ET
by Cyan is again making a fool of Herself
Is your aunt the Pope?
That would work for everyone.
Talk to a bishop.
Haiku # 74852, February 12, 2022 10:58 am ET
by Hail Mary Mother of God
My aunt just called me
My cousin needs a sponsor
For the Catholic Church
Haiku # 74851, February 12, 2022 10:40 am ET
by Cyan is tired of Confirmation Politics
Woe, woe unto thee!
Thou hast written bad haiku.
Thou shalt have great shame.
Haiku # 74850, February 12, 2022 8:14 am ET
by The Haiku Apostle of Lyrical Vengeance
I paid Jesus Christ
lip service - then he touched me
and healed the cold sores
Haiku # 74849, February 12, 2022 7:22 am ET
by the other apostle of sandy spot
Jesus Christ caught me
pleasuring myself to the
Song of Songs again
Haiku # 74848, February 12, 2022 7:19 am ET
by the other apostle of Inappropriate touching
wedding at Cana
"mom, I think they've had enough"
Mary drinks too much
Haiku # 74847, February 12, 2022 7:17 am ET
by the other apostle of sober living manger
trip to Jamaica:
Jesus got beads in his hair
embarrassed apostles
Haiku # 74846, February 12, 2022 6:44 am ET
by The other apostle of Irie Gnosticism
no one has to know
about all the casting calls
you pick ‘em Jesus
Haiku # 74845, February 12, 2022 6:41 am ET
by the other apostle of Epstein’s bouncy house
Jesus was a dude
and he ran a few errands
then they wrote the book
Haiku # 74844, February 12, 2022 6:37 am ET
by The other apostle of desert place probably
Shitty haikus: Go
Thinking about valentines
Again: suicide
Haiku # 74843, February 12, 2022 2:56 am ET
by Cyan Chan of Again it’s me
Like blue-haired vape fags,
your smoke-screen overpowers.
Better make it fast.

Pinching those fig turds,
chocolate coated morsells
of fruity goodness.

When I'm dead and gone
you can inject my ashes;
be with you always.
Haiku # 74842, February 11, 2022 10:43 pm ET
by Happy VD day!
Darth, you have lost it.
Now you call yourself "Cyan"?
You are truly whacked!
Haiku # 74841, February 11, 2022 9:38 pm ET
by Philippine Split of Personalities
What's to lie about?
We would like to see your leg.
Look into my heads.
Haiku # 74840, February 11, 2022 9:26 pm ET
by Sexy oaken thighs of scurvy ostriches.
I try not to lie
But I’ve been known to be bad
Horrible person
Haiku # 74839, February 11, 2022 6:48 pm ET
by Cyan again of Not going through this again unless it’s the end
Arrrrr, I'm a pirate
I've got me a wooden leg
Care to admire it?
Haiku # 74838, February 11, 2022 6:21 pm ET
by Bird of Pray
I think you don’t want
To torture on purpose but
Please don’t lie to me
Haiku # 74837, February 11, 2022 6:04 pm ET
by jvk of (home)
Not unusual.
Most inhabitants of zoos
are medicated.
Haiku # 74836, February 11, 2022 5:33 pm ET
by So That Big Pharma Makes Big Buck$$$$$$
Heresy loggers
They belong to the Catholics
1-1-1 Seconds
Haiku # 74835, February 11, 2022 3:33 pm ET
by Cyan of SLTX
That was nice of you.
Why are they medicated?
That's unusual.
Haiku # 74834, February 11, 2022 1:44 pm ET
by Sneaking into cages. of Looking for Valium.
His zoo membership
I bought for him and his mom
I hope he enjoys
Haiku # 74833, February 11, 2022 11:30 am ET
by Cyan again of Love sickness and Sugar Land
All part of God's plan.
Thor rad zine, salty peter.
Curbed naughty thoughties.

Haiku for the sin.
Invigorating father.
He's a sextsmella.
Haiku # 74832, February 11, 2022 9:35 am ET
by propane is cheaper, ash of if you hadn't noticed
I'm here at the zoo.
Everyone is very nice.
They're medicated!
Haiku # 74831, February 11, 2022 9:14 am ET
by Zoological Psych Ward of Heaven
Had a reaction
Crazy kookoo bananas
Harmful ex girlfriend
Haiku # 74830, February 11, 2022 8:37 am ET
by Cyan Cyan of Sugar Land
#74797

I'd like to thank you.
I haven't been wowed like that
since I don't know when.
Haiku # 74829, February 11, 2022 7:46 am ET
by Summarizes nicely.
#74797

I'd like to thank you.
I haven't been wowed like that
since I don't know when.
Haiku # 74828, February 11, 2022 7:46 am ET
by Summarizes nicely.
Pining for the days
Starkitten droned on about
good cunnilingus.
Haiku # 74827, February 11, 2022 3:20 am ET
by Owwww.
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