Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 192 Days and 77105 Haiku later...

Someone rearranged
the furniture in this joint
Yo, Martha Stewart
Haiku # 69753, January 23, 2021 5:26 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Under the New Old Willow
Nice. This site got sold
To your Chinee overlords.
A new global look !
Haiku # 69752, January 23, 2021 5:24 pm ET
by Times New Ramen of CCP Central Commitee
Test test damned server
Post this infernal design
And then go relax
Haiku # 69751, January 23, 2021 3:01 pm ET
by Janis
Larry King’s last fart
Sputtered in a microphone
(Snap of suspenders)
Haiku # 69750, January 23, 2021 1:12 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Permanent Laryngitis Department
Sometimes the sun farts
and it stinks to high heavens
That’s called Solar Winds

2 Scoops Raisin Bran
Remember those commercials
Farting makes him smile

Grapes dried in the sun
Raisins: Mighty Fart Nuggets
The sun is real smart
Haiku # 69749, January 23, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by Fart Scientist of Lavatory
Bad Haiku News

Larry King is dead
Megamillions winner
Vaccine supply low
Haiku # 69748, January 23, 2021 11:59 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Honey, let’s pretend
we are happily married
and my dink is huge
Haiku # 69747, January 23, 2021 10:35 am ET
by D. of Marriage Encounter
where is the donald ?
rome wasn't trashed in a day
yesterday's nero
Haiku # 69746, January 23, 2021 8:23 am ET
by ash
Haiku janitor
This area sanitized
for your protection
Haiku # 69745, January 23, 2021 7:58 am ET
by Lou Minol of Bloody Mess
Cannibal Meal Kits
Delectable Selections
without all the work
Haiku # 69744, January 22, 2021 11:27 pm ET
by Like having an extra set of hands of in the kitchen
Whilst pushing a cart
Wave your arms like a madman
alternating sides
Haiku # 69743, January 22, 2021 11:20 pm ET
by There’s a new dance of Do “the Darth” Do the “expensive cheese grab”
Corpse collecting bugs
Always wanted a hobby
Never had the time
Haiku # 69742, January 22, 2021 9:33 pm ET
by It’s never too late of To live your best life
It’s embarrassing
when they find you all hacked up
like, just a torso
Haiku # 69741, January 22, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by Jane Doe of Here and There
Very good interest
You can tell by his boner
Table levitates
Haiku # 69740, January 22, 2021 9:18 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Loaner with a Boner, Head Office
Girls,Ladies,Women!!..
Lend me your vaginas! (moan)
Very good interest
Haiku # 69739, January 22, 2021 9:15 pm ET
by Apply Now! of Certified Lender of Genitalia
I was constipated
Dude I tried Hatha yoga
I Hatha shit now
Haiku # 69738, January 22, 2021 9:08 pm ET
by Downward Facing Dung of Smelly Church Basement
Discuss vaginas.
Pick: Girls, ladies, or women.
Someone asked me this.

I said girls for fun,
Ladies if I want a date,
women for laundry.
Haiku # 69737, January 22, 2021 8:44 pm ET
by Fake News of course I'm really gay, you know.
Bad Haiku News

Darth admits he's gay.
Joined by Noticer in the
public park bathroom.

The president waits.
He's only Biden his time.
Bad haiku dad jokes.

I should get a life.
I'll take yours; you don't use it.
Wong dong schlong ping-pong.
Haiku # 69736, January 22, 2021 8:41 pm ET
by The REAL News of Trump Tower
I'm doing yoga.
If I can suck my own dick,
I'll be soooo happy.
Haiku # 69735, January 22, 2021 8:33 pm ET
by But then I can't collect bugs. :-( of As if yoga's not gay enough.
Lady-boys are gross.
If I wear fins and flippers,
still I'm no dolphin.
Haiku # 69734, January 22, 2021 8:29 pm ET
by Silly sods. of Only real men can be fags!
the best part of reach-
arounds is pretending you
went all the way through.
Haiku # 69733, January 22, 2021 8:25 pm ET
by ... and no babies! Bug-Hunters Anonymous. of Hello, my names Joe, It's been 3 days since my last butt-bang.
There's nothing to say.
I'll write this shit anyway.
Holy shit, I'm gay!

High protein meal.
Glory hole so nutritious.
Vitamin slurpies.

Goes well with coffee.
In one hole, out the other.
Sea men's semen, man.
Haiku # 69732, January 22, 2021 8:21 pm ET
by So many holes! Penis, glory, mouth, ass, toilet. Whole & complete, something to eat. of IIt's free, no tax, environmentally friendly, you should try! Experiment! Don't deny science!
Christmas music sucks.
Moreso when eight months of it.
Fucking Philippines.
Haiku # 69731, January 22, 2021 8:07 pm ET
by Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho of Angeles City brothel hopping
You mom is upset
because your dad won't try them.
Open you mind, mom!

Open your mind
then open your behind.
Handcuffs will bind.
Do the grind
and you will find
wet like watermelon rind.
Haiku # 69730, January 22, 2021 8:03 pm ET
by squirt squirt squirt of course it won't hurt
so anyways i
did order another dcolivery
coz i fuckin can
Haiku # 69729, January 22, 2021 7:39 pm ET
by anal beads pt. 6
she lectures me for hour
i feel hurt but i know what i
did was not that bad
Haiku # 69728, January 22, 2021 7:38 pm ET
by anal beads part 5 of pain
my dad texts my mom
she is very angry now
she says im not normal
Haiku # 69727, January 22, 2021 7:36 pm ET
by anal beads part 4
oh shit fuckity fuck
shit goddamn fuck im stupid
i done goofed again
Haiku # 69726, January 22, 2021 7:35 pm ET
by anal beads pt 3
i wait for anal beads
they say they have arrived now
dad called he has them
Haiku # 69725, January 22, 2021 7:34 pm ET
by anal beads pt.2
i ordered anal beads
i sent them to my dads home
he opened the box
Haiku # 69724, January 22, 2021 7:32 pm ET
by anal bead part 1
haha sixty nine
funny sex number haha
see count of haiku
Haiku # 69723, January 22, 2021 7:29 pm ET
by anal cancer of big sad
fucking midget poem
haiku whatever thingy bob
is very much scuffed
Haiku # 69722, January 22, 2021 7:27 pm ET
by goodanalhygeine of yorknew city
Look at nude midgets
Observe the phenomenon
Table levitates
Haiku # 69721, January 22, 2021 6:41 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker of Immature Magician for Hire
We’re not wearing masks
When the Viagara kicks in
we'll hump in the streets
Haiku # 69720, January 22, 2021 6:36 pm ET
by Public Display of Infection
No toilet paper
So I wiped my ass with toast
and charged you 12 bucks
Haiku # 69719, January 22, 2021 6:29 pm ET
by Hipster Cafe Proprietor of Hipster Cafe
Booger farts on toast
What all the hipsters order
Fuck avocado
Haiku # 69718, January 22, 2021 6:26 pm ET
by Nelly Boogerfartado of Rooftop Helicopter Landing Pad
Juicy bursts of flavour
Boogers are like bouillon cubes
Pairs well with earwax
Haiku # 69717, January 22, 2021 6:19 pm ET
by I. Pickham of Nostril Havest Magazine
I do not know how.
Booger farts are a real thing.
That's what google says.

But do boogers fart?
Or just farts from eating them?
Ask some grade school kids.
Haiku # 69716, January 22, 2021 4:32 pm ET
by Survey says....
Noticer steals
vile vials of bile
to write haiku with.
Haiku # 69715, January 22, 2021 4:25 pm ET
by Covid molecules are not impressed with your apparent lack of effort to stop them with bad haiku.
Bad Haiku News

Doc steals vaccine vile
Chappelle Covid Positive
Arnold get vaccine
Haiku # 69713, January 22, 2021 11:32 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Bad Haiku News

Joe Biden sworn in
One winning Powerball ticket
Simpsons right again
Haiku # 69712, January 22, 2021 3:53 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Swimming in Loch Ness
Say, now someone’s goosing me
Sea monsters are fun
Haiku # 69711, January 21, 2021 11:23 pm ET
by Skinny Dipper of Feeling around for my missing bagpipe
I am a robot
Look, I’m seventeen feet tall
I’m constipated
Haiku # 69710, January 21, 2021 10:37 pm ET
by Gunked Up of Robot Saloon
I'm not a robot
I can make actual poops
By eating people
Haiku # 69709, January 21, 2021 10:29 pm ET
by Pootronic5000
Can’t be a mirror
Your reflection comes with a
huge elephant’s trunk
Haiku # 69708, January 21, 2021 8:40 pm ET
by Got junk but no trunk of Mirror
You can also say
that great behinds stink alike.
You sexy beast, you!
Haiku # 69707, January 21, 2021 6:38 pm ET
by It's like looking in a haiku mirror!
Great minds think alike
That’s what I like about you
Plus you’re kinda hot
Haiku # 69706, January 21, 2021 6:01 pm ET
by Just another sexy poet of Under old willow
About the cuntfart,
I was thinking the same thing.
But switch F and C.
Haiku # 69705, January 21, 2021 5:08 pm ET
by Funtcart funtcart funt of Like a fun go cart that smells like day old tuna. Running on fumes.
Listen, this is Q
My new hobby is haiku
You should try it too
Haiku # 69704, January 21, 2021 4:54 pm ET
by Q of Out of my mind
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cuntfart cunt
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku # 69703, January 21, 2021 7:48 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
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