BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
31 Days
and
66574 Haikus
later...
On this wondrous Thanksgiving
We give thanks for the food
And also for the divine blessing
That Darth Pigtickler aka fart poet
Shall meet a timely death
And shall verily, in due time
Shut the fuck up
Amen
Haiku #66492, by Cuttlefish Prime of Thanksgiving Feast
November 28, 2019 9:25 pm ET

Wong, better watch out.
If you insult my @$$ hat,
roll right over you.
Haiku #66491, by Rolling in Dough of Bakery of Fakery
November 28, 2019 8:01 pm ET

Time for Black Friday:
Buy a used record player
For seven dollars.
Haiku #66490, by Then Give It Away and Go to Bed Early
November 28, 2019 7:56 pm ET

I love blunderbuss.
Feel her swelling curve get warm,
Flint to powder: BOOM
Haiku #66489, by Recoil Knocked Me Halfway Back to England
November 28, 2019 7:49 pm ET

I'll warn the bitches
Who hate the Lord Jesus Christ...
then we burn witches.
Haiku #66488, by Blessed Be All Bitches of This Place
November 28, 2019 7:43 pm ET

Can we trade Honkies?
For the SOB leftists
That hate America?

Honkies fight Commies.
And fight for Hong Kong freedom!
And love America!

Democrats burning
The proud American flag
That's how @$$ hats roll.
Haiku #66487, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 28, 2019 4:58 pm ET

Puritan i jest.
And predestined were the "saints".
to burn witches here.
Haiku #66486, by vhs
November 28, 2019 4:55 pm ET

Thankful for longpig
Masturbation -free dining
Not an option here
Haiku #66485, by Pleased of Next to my blunderbuss
November 28, 2019 8:08 am ET

If you hate Pilgrims
Then vomit up the big meal
and start your shopping.
Haiku #66484, by Calvinists created the country everyone now wants a piece of, but you would be too dim to grasp that
November 28, 2019 7:03 am ET

Malign Puritans!
Rage against America!
Revise history!
Haiku #66483, by New England: Origin of United States
November 28, 2019 6:59 am ET

Revile the Pilgrims!
Spew against God and Country!
You know you want to.
Haiku #66482, by Noble Savage of Massachusetts
November 28, 2019 6:55 am ET

Dad, raping poultry
In - Bird ejaculation
Family gathering
Haiku #66481, by Elle Trytophan of Couch
November 28, 2019 1:50 am ET

Existential dread
Repetition rituals
Repeat until done
Haiku #66480, by Adam Ben Adam
November 27, 2019 10:34 pm ET

Bong the cute Hmong girl
So sweet and lovely its sad
She does not like Wong.
Haiku #66479, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 27, 2019 3:02 pm ET

At least she answers.
Mine couldn't care less for verse.
She despises it.
Haiku #66478, by Wife of Strife for Life
November 27, 2019 1:01 pm ET

The dull wife responds.
Answering my bad haiku.
Yes, I hate you too.
Haiku #66477, by Evil cunt. of Destroyer of lives.
November 27, 2019 7:54 am ET

Black Friday draws near.
Now shut up and buy,buy,buy.
(As TRUMP commands you)
Haiku #66476, by Lemmings of Amurrica
November 27, 2019 7:04 am ET

Love me some HAIKU !
Bring it on, any old time.
Haiku and beer, bro.
Haiku #66475, by Rusty McPherson of Amarillo TX Lone Star State come on over were barbecuin
November 27, 2019 5:33 am ET

Red! Gong hee fat choy!
Auspicious omens bring wealth:
burn more hell-money.
Haiku #66474, by Amulet Altar of Oracle
November 27, 2019 5:29 am ET

Yeah yeah youre NUTS , bud.
What the hell you tryna say?
Ya got a screw loose.
Haiku #66473, by Guy wearing gray Dickies with toolbox
November 27, 2019 5:24 am ET

Monsters on the streets.
Far more evil than those up
on the silver screen.
Haiku #66472, by Enter their brains and feed.
November 27, 2019 4:02 am ET

I stepped in some Schiff.
it was a Schiffty thing to do
Dog Schiff on my shoe
Haiku #66471, by Hunter Buydem of Spearmint Rhino
November 27, 2019 3:04 am ET

Impeach Trump bull chit!
You lose again Commie dolts!
When will you grow up?
Haiku #66470, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 27, 2019 2:56 am ET

Hideous creatures
Plexaderm scary monsters!
Selling fake face lift

Wow who are you? wow!
You put the bondo on mug!?
Ha ha ha ha YIKES!!
Haiku #66469, by Prince Charming of Heast Castle
November 27, 2019 2:52 am ET

Catch all devils-
Seal them in the black jade jar-
using peach wood sword-
Haiku #66468, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 27, 2019 2:44 am ET

Open your third eye.
Evil presence surrounds you.
But what will you do?
Haiku #66467, by This universe needs a purge.
November 27, 2019 2:32 am ET

When it's all over,
he who has the most blue cheese
is declared winner.
Haiku #66466, by df
November 27, 2019 2:30 am ET

A meme-specific
Bioweapon comes from space
Vaporizing you
Haiku #66465, by Cuttlefish Prime Alpha of Low Earth Orbit
November 26, 2019 10:21 pm ET

Tallyho, fart boy
Veneer of intelligence
"Clever" camouflage
Haiku #66464, by Cuttlefish Prime of Adaptation
November 26, 2019 7:03 pm ET

Oh Pallas, slay him.
Grey-eyed muse and protector,
Rend him limb from limb.
Haiku #66463, by That Fart Poet, of course
November 26, 2019 5:37 pm ET

I am blending in
Now, irreverent humor
And then some fart jokes
Haiku #66462, by Cuttlefish
November 26, 2019 2:05 pm ET

Hail Pastathena:
Thine owl, thy helmeted head,
Thy meatballs in sauce.
Haiku #66461, by Dionysos of Apollonium
November 26, 2019 8:19 am ET

If I've told you once
I've told you a thousand times
Cunfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku #66460, by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
November 25, 2019 9:47 pm ET

Submit a haiku
badhaiku.com is great
gosh, my third haiku
Haiku #66459, by pastathena of vancouver,canada
November 25, 2019 5:24 pm ET

This is for skeppy
his fav number is 14
a6d idot
Haiku #66458, by pastathena of vancouver,canada
November 25, 2019 5:23 pm ET

First in many years
What the heck is wrong with me
Geez time flies by fast
Haiku #66457, by pastathena of vancouver,canada
November 25, 2019 5:22 pm ET

There once was a man
He had two - TWO!! - penises
That's it: that's the joke
Haiku #66456, by Anomalous Penises of India
November 24, 2019 8:51 pm ET

Queen Elizabeth
Grunting out a big kaka
Hard act to follow
Haiku #66455, by Quivering Asshole of In the vicinity
November 24, 2019 7:18 pm ET

Do not call pigs pigs.
They prefer "sexy chub yums".
Who ate all my cake?!
Haiku #66454, by peeled banana
November 24, 2019 3:56 pm ET

Dear Darth: don't worry.
Your bad haiku forgiven
By the blood of Christ.
Haiku #66453, by Six-armed Goddess of Haiku
November 24, 2019 12:50 pm ET

I'm having regrets.
Every haiku I've written
should be deleted.
Haiku #66452, by Darth Figpucker of What a horrible person I am.
November 24, 2019 1:09 am ET

A chick with six arms.
Simultaneous hand jobs.
Curry afterwards.
Haiku #66451, by df of Don't forget the chai tea.
November 24, 2019 12:53 am ET

Or for the price of
One six armed woman you could
Get six armed women
Haiku #66450, by They Might Shoot You Though
November 23, 2019 3:57 pm ET

Listen Jasswini:
I really need an escort.
Six armed woman. Thanks.
Haiku #66449, by Do I pay in Rupees or Dollars?
November 22, 2019 10:34 am ET





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Haiku #66448, by Jasswini of Delhi
November 22, 2019 9:00 am ET

Akashic records:
Love, light, positive vibes, OMMmm...
Whoops. That's Lucifer!
Haiku #66447, by Fatal Errors of the New Age
November 22, 2019 7:53 am ET

Chickens in the coop
Peck peck peck peck peck peck Poop
Chickens in the coop
Haiku #66446, by Bawk bawk bawk of Begaw
November 22, 2019 4:15 am ET

Chocolate mousse kaka
I'm not having any luck
Choking this shit down
Haiku #66445, by The Gorger of Restroom
November 22, 2019 4:09 am ET

The next time you feel some
Goblins leaving your anus
To write some haiku for you
Just... don't
Haiku #66444, by Dear Bad Haiku
November 21, 2019 4:43 pm ET

A rosey-cheeked Schiff
On the lap of the Derp State
Like Howdy Doody
Haiku #66443, by If Howdy Doody Hung Out With Ed Buck
November 21, 2019 4:29 pm ET