Bad Haiku

The next time you feel some
Goblins leaving your anus
To write some haiku for you
Just... don't

Haiku #66444, by Dear Bad Haiku
November 21, 2019 4:43 pm ET

A rosey-cheeked Schiff
On the lap of the Derp State
Like Howdy Doody

Haiku #66443, by If Howdy Doody Hung Out With Ed Buck
November 21, 2019 4:29 pm ET

Talkin' bout that UNH !
Git all up on it, nome sain?
Git y'all some PUSSY.

Haiku #66442, by Patron, Tutor and Benefactor of the Grand Old Duke of York
November 21, 2019 10:21 am ET

Another night and
another day; an old-school
killer has to slay.

Haiku #66441, by Imitation of Flattery
November 21, 2019 7:15 am ET

Another day and
another night, a new school
shooting brought to light

Haiku #66440, by Line of lines
November 20, 2019 10:37 pm ET

No more vulgar verse.
Consider yourself warned:
A haiku re-set.

Haiku #66439, by Morals Committee of Haiku Safety
November 20, 2019 2:32 pm ET

Your lovely fat wife
is my Plan B backup muse.
She inspires my verse.

Haiku #66438, by Bridal Beauty of Spiritual Vision
November 20, 2019 8:27 am ET

If you masturbate
to pictures of my fat wife,
watch the video!

Haiku #66437, by youporn.com of Limited time only
November 19, 2019 11:48 pm ET

November just spits,
Then pours cold Coca-Cola
Down my back. Lovely.

Haiku #66436, by Seasonal Charm of New England
November 19, 2019 6:14 pm ET

Awaiting My Fate
Blown Rectal Integrity
Pegged To Death Screaming

Haiku #66435, by Mc Flesh Toaster of Nunyers
November 19, 2019 5:20 pm ET

Sodomite listen:
the universe DOES revolve
around your highness.

Haiku #66434, by Highness of Anus
November 18, 2019 7:52 am ET

Jamie lee Curtis
Probably smells like tuna
And diarrhea

Haiku #66433, by Newsflash of For immediate release
November 18, 2019 1:52 am ET

Sodomite listen:
A stray breeze gently whispers
"Bleu cheese ain't that great"

Haiku #66432, by Anonymous Poet
November 17, 2019 10:36 pm ET

You stand corrected.
The gentle art of Haiku
Finds disciples here.

Haiku #66431, by Eat Me, Basho of Your Haiku Sucked anyway
November 17, 2019 1:43 pm ET

Two fat ugly dudes
Watch each other masturbate
That is this website

Haiku #66430, by Finally done wit it
November 17, 2019 12:30 pm ET

Figpucker chew bleese.
Figpucker chew bleese some more.
Go, Figpucker, go !

Haiku #66429, by Les TrÃ¨s Riches Heures du D.F.
November 17, 2019 8:10 am ET

This is amazing.
It's better than anything.
Have you tried it yet?

Haiku #66428, by Blue cheese on pretzel sticks.
November 17, 2019 4:26 am ET

James Bond ate blue cheese.
The Fonz also ate blue cheese.
See what I'm saying?

Haiku #66427, by df
November 17, 2019 12:26 am ET

Pterodactyl farts
Dank forboding clouds hang low
Grinning cloaca

Haiku #66426, by Schlongosaurus of Jurrasic prick
November 15, 2019 9:40 pm ET

Playing with your wang
Jerking it seventeen times
Jizzing syllables

Haiku #66425, by Noticer of Details of Undisclosed
November 15, 2019 7:55 pm ET

Central Potty say:
revisionist running dogs
shall be neutered.

Haiku #66424, by Chairman Mouse of Mouse Trap
November 15, 2019 4:59 pm ET

Starkitten gave up.
VHS is back on dope.
Wang and I shall rule!

Haiku #66423, by Haiku is a Competitive Sport for Alpha Males Who Dominate Their Inferiors and Surpass all Objectives
November 15, 2019 4:53 pm ET

Tremble before him!
Phillipenis of Haiku:
Dork Lard Figpucker.

Haiku #66422, by He Speaks Tagalog Too
November 15, 2019 4:22 pm ET

Lofan is triggered
Get ready for angry spew
Nonsense talking points

Haiku #66421, by Jesus is lard
November 15, 2019 1:20 pm ET

Chi com's love Trump too
They have special name for him....
Orange Paper Tiger

Haiku #66420, by Jesus is lard
November 15, 2019 1:18 pm ET

Roger Stone guilty
Many more to follow soon
Draining the swamp eh?

Haiku #66419, by Jesus is lard
November 15, 2019 12:38 pm ET

To write a Haiku!
Ahh... to feel the wind blowing
Out of your own ass.

Haiku #66418, by Out of Gas
November 14, 2019 8:02 pm ET

Undead dead for years
They head for the voting booths
All vote Democrat

Haiku #66417, by Voter Fraud
November 14, 2019 2:06 pm ET

Hollyweird Chi-coms
The Zionist Fifth Column
Godless Globalists

Haiku #66416, by Get Me Another Beer
November 14, 2019 8:24 am ET

Hey you Wong Lofan:
Stop dreaming of woman's butt
and get back to work!

Haiku #66415, by Central Party of Surveillance
November 14, 2019 7:13 am ET

The whistle blow hard
Is a CIA jive pinko
Liar S.O.B.

Like John Brennan
The Bolshevik Islamic
A bull $hit artist.

Haiku #66414, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 14, 2019 3:45 am ET

The Mexican girl
Told me all her work troubles
Sank into her eyes.

Very bad of Wong
He was not listening good
dreaming of her butt.

Haiku #66413, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
November 14, 2019 3:36 am ET

I slit Haiku's throat
Then I bathed in her warm blood,
Adoring her corpse.

Haiku #66412, by Miss Conception of Misogyny, Nebraska U.S.A.
November 14, 2019 3:06 am ET

There is no Haiku,
No one to read the Haiku,
And there is no bride.

Haiku #66411, by Blue Cheese is Red of Unread
November 14, 2019 2:56 am ET

Ommmmmmm . . . A-ha !! Get it?
The mantra for your woman.
Your own Wide Woman.

Haiku #66410, by Blue Cheese of Undressing
November 14, 2019 2:51 am ET

She is the widest
And wildest in Omaha.
(Queen of the Kingdom.)

Haiku #66409, by Your Blushing Bride Bride, that is. Thanks for keeping her in that Burqa
November 14, 2019 2:43 am ET

Your wide wife's the one.
Every sweaty inch of her.
I pay to see her.

Haiku #66408, by Only in Haiku, and clothed, of course.
November 14, 2019 2:19 am ET

My wife's a cam whore.
She's got a WIDE angle lens.
She'll get dressed for cash.

And well worth it too.
You don't want to see all that.
I wish I hadn't.

Haiku #66407, by Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom of Free Range Blue Cheese
November 13, 2019 9:34 pm ET

Oh Lordy, gran-pa
That there corn-pone is on fire!
Ah jest have to SHOUT!

Haiku #66406, by Revival Church in the Dell of The Holler
November 13, 2019 9:33 pm ET

OUT, ye vile vixen;
Homegrown harlot of the hills!
Hellfire in hotpants.

Haiku #66405, by ACT II of Tennessee Tragedy 1941
November 13, 2019 8:54 pm ET

Why dear old Pastor:
Lil' old me would never tempt
Nobody. Wink, wink...

Haiku #66404, by Hillbilly Temptress of Lil Abner
November 13, 2019 8:48 pm ET

Why in tarnation
Should I lend you a damn thing?
Done drunk muh moonshine.

Haiku #66403, by Second Hillbilly of Smoky Mountain Tragedy
November 13, 2019 8:00 pm ET

Howdy-do thar Clem.
Kin y'all lend me some corn-pone?
Hard times in the hills.

Haiku #66402, by Uncle Ferguson of Jest a-Sittin on Muh Old Cabin Porch
November 13, 2019 7:57 pm ET

Interesting range:
Distant summit, wreathed in mist...
Kiss my ass, Poet.

Haiku #66401, by Poetry of Tranquility
November 13, 2019 7:53 pm ET

Corn was in my poop
And the corn I pooped was popped
I popped out a poop

Haiku #66400, by Fart Knower of Gas Blower
November 13, 2019 6:39 pm ET

Y'all strait-up pussies.
I git me some STILTON, yo.
Fine Stilton. Feel me?

Haiku #66399, by High-end Vinter of Oenology
November 13, 2019 2:35 am ET

Blue Cheese In Da HOUSE!
Mutherfuckin' Roquefort, yo!
Man, I snort dat shit!

Haiku #66398, by Darth Putain de Truie
November 12, 2019 9:42 pm ET

The Whistle Blower:
That's Eric Ciaramella!
Please censor his name.

Haiku #66397, by Eric's Ukrainian Mother of Greater Russia
November 12, 2019 4:51 pm ET

E. Ciaramella:
That would be E for Eric
The Whistle Farter

Haiku #66396, by No Pain, No Ukraine
November 11, 2019 2:11 pm ET

Ghost in my asshole
That's moaning. Not flatulence.
Proof that ghosts are real

Haiku #66395, by Walkin Funny of The usual haunts
November 11, 2019 10:08 am ET