Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 153 Days and 70446 Haikus later...

OUT, ye vile vixen;
Homegrown harlot of the hills!
Hellfire in hotpants.
Haiku # 66405, November 13, 2019 8:54 pm ET
by ACT II of Tennessee Tragedy 1941
Why dear old Pastor:
Lil' old me would never tempt
Nobody. Wink, wink...
Haiku # 66404, November 13, 2019 8:48 pm ET
by Hillbilly Temptress of Lil Abner
Why in tarnation
Should I lend you a damn thing?
Done drunk muh moonshine.
Haiku # 66403, November 13, 2019 8:00 pm ET
by Second Hillbilly of Smoky Mountain Tragedy
Howdy-do thar Clem.
Kin y'all lend me some corn-pone?
Hard times in the hills.
Haiku # 66402, November 13, 2019 7:57 pm ET
by Uncle Ferguson of Jest a-Sittin on Muh Old Cabin Porch
Interesting range:
Distant summit, wreathed in mist...
Kiss my ass, Poet.
Haiku # 66401, November 13, 2019 7:53 pm ET
by Poetry of Tranquility
Corn was in my poop
And the corn I pooped was popped
I popped out a poop
Haiku # 66400, November 13, 2019 6:39 pm ET
by Fart Knower of Gas Blower
Y'all strait-up pussies.
I git me some STILTON, yo.
Fine Stilton. Feel me?
Haiku # 66399, November 13, 2019 2:35 am ET
by High-end Vinter of Oenology
Blue Cheese In Da HOUSE!
Mutherfuckin' Roquefort, yo!
Man, I snort dat shit!
Haiku # 66398, November 12, 2019 9:42 pm ET
by Darth Putain de Truie

The Whistle Blower:
That's Eric Ciaramella!
Please censor his name.
Haiku # 66397, November 12, 2019 4:51 pm ET
by Eric's Ukrainian Mother of Greater Russia
E. Ciaramella:
That would be E for Eric
The Whistle Farter
Haiku # 66396, November 11, 2019 2:11 pm ET
by No Pain, No Ukraine
Ghost in my asshole
That's moaning. Not flatulence.
Proof that ghosts are real
Haiku # 66395, November 11, 2019 10:08 am ET
by Walkin Funny of The usual haunts
Why not wipe your ass
With fresh sliced Italian bread
Make a turd sandwich
Haiku # 66394, November 11, 2019 1:48 am ET
by Rachael Fellatio Ray of TV
Fromunda blue cheese
Dank musk of nut sack salute
Got it going on
Haiku # 66393, November 10, 2019 4:14 am ET
by All that of Jizz factory
Colt single action
Click, click, click click, that spells Colt.
Hawg leg .44!
Haiku # 66392, November 10, 2019 2:48 am ET
by Pike Bishop of Starbuck Tx.
Used to ride the range
Many tenderfoot fops there
They did not know shit

But they thought they did
Can't tell a damn Cow from Sheep
Useless bastards all.

Rope your Haiku pard
Or get your Mom to do it
and get off my range.
Haiku # 66391, November 10, 2019 2:31 am ET
by Pike Bishop of Starbuck Tx.
None of us have range?
What, within haiku verse form?
You can kiss my range.
Haiku # 66390, November 9, 2019 9:57 pm ET
by I know you are really Darth anyway
None of you have range
Same themes and same ideas
Not interesting
Haiku # 66389, November 9, 2019 8:32 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Okinawa girl
Skilled in the downward dawg pose
your so very cute!

In yer yoga pants
a nose in the camels tent
prayer mat of flesh.
Haiku # 66388, November 9, 2019 4:13 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Okie yoga girl
wanted to drink beer with Wong
Wong did not go there

Another mistake
Flexible, sexy,- big boobs.
Wong so very wrong..
Haiku # 66387, November 9, 2019 4:06 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Poki-haunt-us- wants
To take- steal, old Wong Lofan's
Billions of dollars!

Cram it fake Injun!
You can't take my silver, gold!
To give to no loads!

I donated my
Billions to the NRA
Just to pi$$ you off!
Haiku # 66386, November 9, 2019 3:43 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Holiday cheese ball
A makeshift dildo of sorts
The cheese stands alone
Haiku # 66385, November 9, 2019 2:37 pm ET
by Microbial action of Follow the moans
Sharp tangy cheddar
Atop your tart apple pie
Then you get the shits
Haiku # 66384, November 9, 2019 2:35 pm ET
by Home Cooking of Home
Your lines of Blue Cheese
get old and stinky quite fast.
Move on to Cheddar.
Haiku # 66383, November 9, 2019 10:56 am ET
by Biodegradation of Fromage
When she did the splits,
and then stood up off her mat,
a line of blue cheese.
Haiku # 66382, November 9, 2019 10:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Wow. Miss Yoga-mat
You really can flex yourself.
How do you do it?
Haiku # 66381, November 9, 2019 6:13 am ET
by Iyengar of Patnajali
She's way spiritual.
I love Mistress Yoga-mat.
She's yogamatic!
Haiku # 66380, November 9, 2019 6:10 am ET
by Patnajali of Pajamarama
Hail to Master Wong
Fighting Kommies with Haiku
Let Reds eat these lines
Haiku # 66379, November 9, 2019 6:07 am ET
by thin red line of syllabobble
Omar the hate girl-
Hates our country to the bone,
Not worth-- a Haiku.
Haiku # 66378, November 9, 2019 4:07 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
AOC one more!
Beer please- in a drunken world
Idjots like you- 'lady'

Rule the DNC
Bat chit crazy leftist kids
Buy all your bull $hit.
Haiku # 66377, November 9, 2019 3:47 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Bernie Bolshevik!
Demented Commie geezer
Flapping arms around

Like you want to fly
Back to Khrushchev's Moscow
Second Honey Moon??
Haiku # 66376, November 9, 2019 3:41 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Beto! wat the hell!?
I thought you were gonna take
My squirrel rifle?

Have another joint
and ride your fooking skate board
to the barber shop.
Haiku # 66375, November 9, 2019 3:32 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Sudoku Haiku
Count one two three four five six
Seven eight and nine
Haiku # 66374, November 9, 2019 12:22 am ET
by It is logic not math
Abu Bakr Al-
What's his face dies every year
Must be resilient
Haiku # 66373, November 7, 2019 6:48 pm ET
by The Derp State
I have a huge cunt.
Of course it isn't my cunt.
I need an upgrade.
Haiku # 66372, November 7, 2019 9:56 am ET
by
Ho Chi Minh, Nixon
Slow dancing in the moonlight
To Frank Sinatra
Haiku # 66371, November 6, 2019 7:30 am ET
by I actually dreamt this haiku
God the Father is Spirit, sperm is physical. Jesus is the offspring of King David through the patrilineal bloodline of his biological father Joseph: [2Tim 2;8] the greek word used for offspring here is spermatos. That's why he said "You just be born AGAIN" [John 3;6-7]. It is a spiritual birth.

The phrase "only begotten" as it occurs in greek is "monogene" which COULD mean "only begotten" if it did not conflict with scripture. David states in scripture that he had been begotten of God. [Ps 2;7]. Again, that was a spiritual birth. It is more likely that the word "mono" in that context was used to mean "one" or "single"

You're not His child, but you could be if you believe that Jesus Christ is the Messiah and repent from sin and the many abominations of your heart.
Haiku # 66370, November 6, 2019 7:27 am ET
by Anonymous Prophet of Desert
Holy sperm count low?
Did God only have one kid?
Aren't we his children?
Haiku # 66369, November 6, 2019 6:36 am ET
by Confused Possible Bastard of Nearby
Cattle carcass stench
Wafting in from slaughterhouse
Yup, I'll eat that shit
Haiku # 66368, November 5, 2019 11:49 pm ET
by Reverential duplicitous
New Pope: Figpucker
Changes made to Vatican...
Just cosmetic ones
Haiku # 66367, November 5, 2019 10:54 pm ET
by Martin Luther of quietly pinning a note to the door
Ah, the uselessness . . .
the sheer USELESS uselessness:
useless Haiku verse.
Haiku # 66366, November 5, 2019 2:32 pm ET
by Utilitarians of Poetic Pragmatism
Swoops in from above
Billionaire from big city
BAT- nope, Donald Trump
Haiku # 66365, November 5, 2019 6:33 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
ivory fowl gaze
dandelion fetta creak
bramble mountain pie
Haiku # 66364, November 5, 2019 5:25 am ET
by Agnes Cowgill of United Kingdom
Blue cheese and blow jobs
Faint tinkling of piano
A familiar tune
Haiku # 66363, November 5, 2019 2:26 am ET
by Drunk of Formerly of barstool
Pick a Christmas gift....
Knitted testicle cozy?
Consider it done
Haiku # 66362, November 4, 2019 1:18 pm ET
by Phil Lesh
White supremacist
Means white guy likes the Supremes
more than Diana
Haiku # 66361, November 4, 2019 9:25 am ET
by I Hear a Symphony of Motor City Detroit
welcome visitor:
"the aliens are coming
get inside quickly!"
Haiku # 66360, November 3, 2019 10:43 pm ET
by it keeps boring people out
****If you're gonna start the killing, you best start it right here. Make sure I'm all the way dead, because I'll come back and make you my bitch!
Haiku # 66359, November 3, 2019 5:50 pm ET
by Captain Spaulding of Spicy limited edition blue cheese chicken wings! They just taste so damn good!
Gun, bow-and-arrow...
Why not land mines or grenades?
Make sure it's done right!
Haiku # 66358, November 3, 2019 5:49 pm ET
by If you're gonna start the killing, you best start it right here. Make sure I'm all the way dead, because I'll come back and make of -- Captain Spaulding
Just like McDonald's,
with every McFigpucker,
you get a free turd.
Haiku # 66357, November 3, 2019 5:46 pm ET
by Not so happy meal. of McD never had a blue cheese burger, the corporate scum... Well, except in France.
You don't need a gun
Why not a bow and arrow?
Just like Ted Nugent
Haiku # 66356, November 3, 2019 10:29 am ET
by Phil Lesh ....for the love of Internet tough guys
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