Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 259 Days and 71094 Haikus later...

Open your third eye.
Evil presence surrounds you.
But what will you do?
Haiku # 66467, November 27, 2019 2:32 am ET
by This universe needs a purge.
When it's all over,
he who has the most blue cheese
is declared winner.
Haiku # 66466, November 27, 2019 2:30 am ET
by df
A meme-specific
Bioweapon comes from space
Vaporizing you
Haiku # 66465, November 26, 2019 10:21 pm ET
by Cuttlefish Prime Alpha of Low Earth Orbit
Tallyho, fart boy
Veneer of intelligence
"Clever" camouflage
Haiku # 66464, November 26, 2019 7:03 pm ET
by Cuttlefish Prime of Adaptation
Oh Pallas, slay him.
Grey-eyed muse and protector,
Rend him limb from limb.
Haiku # 66463, November 26, 2019 5:37 pm ET
by That Fart Poet, of course
I am blending in
Now, irreverent humor
And then some fart jokes
Haiku # 66462, November 26, 2019 2:05 pm ET
by Cuttlefish
Hail Pastathena:
Thine owl, thy helmeted head,
Thy meatballs in sauce.
Haiku # 66461, November 26, 2019 8:19 am ET
by Dionysos of Apollonium
If I've told you once
I've told you a thousand times
Cunfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku # 66460, November 25, 2019 9:47 pm ET
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
Submit a haiku
badhaiku.com is great
gosh, my third haiku
Haiku # 66459, November 25, 2019 5:24 pm ET
by pastathena of vancouver,canada
This is for skeppy
his fav number is 14
a6d idot
Haiku # 66458, November 25, 2019 5:23 pm ET
by pastathena of vancouver,canada
First in many years
What the heck is wrong with me
Geez time flies by fast
Haiku # 66457, November 25, 2019 5:22 pm ET
by pastathena of vancouver,canada
There once was a man
He had two - TWO!! - penises
That's it: that's the joke
Haiku # 66456, November 24, 2019 8:51 pm ET
by Anomalous Penises of India
Queen Elizabeth
Grunting out a big kaka
Hard act to follow
Haiku # 66455, November 24, 2019 7:18 pm ET
by Quivering Asshole of In the vicinity
Do not call pigs pigs.
They prefer "sexy chub yums".
Who ate all my cake?!
Haiku # 66454, November 24, 2019 3:56 pm ET
by peeled banana
Dear Darth: don't worry.
Your bad haiku forgiven
By the blood of Christ.
Haiku # 66453, November 24, 2019 12:50 pm ET
by Six-armed Goddess of Haiku
I'm having regrets.
Every haiku I've written
should be deleted.
Haiku # 66452, November 24, 2019 1:09 am ET
by Darth Figpucker of What a horrible person I am.
A chick with six arms.
Simultaneous hand jobs.
Curry afterwards.
Haiku # 66451, November 24, 2019 12:53 am ET
by df of Don't forget the chai tea.
Or for the price of
One six armed woman you could
Get six armed women
Haiku # 66450, November 23, 2019 3:57 pm ET
by They Might Shoot You Though
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I really need an escort.
Six armed woman. Thanks.
Haiku # 66449, November 22, 2019 10:34 am ET
by Do I pay in Rupees or Dollars?




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Haiku # 66448, November 22, 2019 9:00 am ET
by Jasswini of Delhi
Akashic records:
Love, light, positive vibes, OMMmm...
Whoops. That's Lucifer!
Haiku # 66447, November 22, 2019 7:53 am ET
by Fatal Errors of the New Age
Chickens in the coop
Peck peck peck peck peck peck Poop
Chickens in the coop
Haiku # 66446, November 22, 2019 4:15 am ET
by Bawk bawk bawk of Begaw
Chocolate mousse kaka
I'm not having any luck
Choking this shit down
Haiku # 66445, November 22, 2019 4:09 am ET
by The Gorger of Restroom
The next time you feel some
Goblins leaving your anus
To write some haiku for you
Just... don't
Haiku # 66444, November 21, 2019 4:43 pm ET
by Dear Bad Haiku
A rosey-cheeked Schiff
On the lap of the Derp State
Like Howdy Doody
Haiku # 66443, November 21, 2019 4:29 pm ET
by If Howdy Doody Hung Out With Ed Buck
Talkin' bout that UNH !
Git all up on it, nome sain?
Git y'all some PUSSY.
Haiku # 66442, November 21, 2019 10:21 am ET
by Patron, Tutor and Benefactor of the Grand Old Duke of York
Another night and
another day; an old-school
killer has to slay.
Haiku # 66441, November 21, 2019 7:15 am ET
by Imitation of Flattery
Another day and
another night, a new school
shooting brought to light
Haiku # 66440, November 20, 2019 10:37 pm ET
by Line of lines
No more vulgar verse.
Consider yourself warned:
A haiku re-set.
Haiku # 66439, November 20, 2019 2:32 pm ET
by Morals Committee of Haiku Safety
Your lovely fat wife
is my Plan B backup muse.
She inspires my verse.
Haiku # 66438, November 20, 2019 8:27 am ET
by Bridal Beauty of Spiritual Vision
If you masturbate
to pictures of my fat wife,
watch the video!
Haiku # 66437, November 19, 2019 11:48 pm ET
by youporn.com of Limited time only
November just spits,
Then pours cold Coca-Cola
Down my back. Lovely.
Haiku # 66436, November 19, 2019 6:14 pm ET
by Seasonal Charm of New England
Awaiting My Fate
Blown Rectal Integrity
Pegged To Death Screaming
Haiku # 66435, November 19, 2019 5:20 pm ET
by Mc Flesh Toaster of Nunyers
Sodomite listen:
the universe DOES revolve
around your highness.
Haiku # 66434, November 18, 2019 7:52 am ET
by Highness of Anus
Jamie lee Curtis
Probably smells like tuna
And diarrhea
Haiku # 66433, November 18, 2019 1:52 am ET
by Newsflash of For immediate release
Sodomite listen:
A stray breeze gently whispers
"Bleu cheese ain't that great"
Haiku # 66432, November 17, 2019 10:36 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
You stand corrected.
The gentle art of Haiku
Finds disciples here.
Haiku # 66431, November 17, 2019 1:43 pm ET
by Eat Me, Basho of Your Haiku Sucked anyway
Two fat ugly dudes
Watch each other masturbate
That is this website
Haiku # 66430, November 17, 2019 12:30 pm ET
by Finally done wit it
Figpucker chew bleese.
Figpucker chew bleese some more.
Go, Figpucker, go !
Haiku # 66429, November 17, 2019 8:10 am ET
by Les Très Riches Heures du D.F.
This is amazing.
It's better than anything.
Have you tried it yet?
Haiku # 66428, November 17, 2019 4:26 am ET
by Blue cheese on pretzel sticks.
James Bond ate blue cheese.
The Fonz also ate blue cheese.
See what I'm saying?
Haiku # 66427, November 17, 2019 12:26 am ET
by df
Pterodactyl farts
Dank forboding clouds hang low
Grinning cloaca
Haiku # 66426, November 15, 2019 9:40 pm ET
by Schlongosaurus of Jurrasic prick
Playing with your wang
Jerking it seventeen times
Jizzing syllables
Haiku # 66425, November 15, 2019 7:55 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Undisclosed
Central Potty say:
revisionist running dogs
shall be neutered.
Haiku # 66424, November 15, 2019 4:59 pm ET
by Chairman Mouse of Mouse Trap
Starkitten gave up.
VHS is back on dope.
Wang and I shall rule!
Haiku # 66423, November 15, 2019 4:53 pm ET
by Haiku is a Competitive Sport for Alpha Males Who Dominate Their Inferiors and Surpass all Objectives
Tremble before him!
Phillipenis of Haiku:
Dork Lard Figpucker.
Haiku # 66422, November 15, 2019 4:22 pm ET
by He Speaks Tagalog Too
Lofan is triggered
Get ready for angry spew
Nonsense talking points
Haiku # 66421, November 15, 2019 1:20 pm ET
by Jesus is lard
Chi com's love Trump too
They have special name for him....
Orange Paper Tiger
Haiku # 66420, November 15, 2019 1:18 pm ET
by Jesus is lard
Roger Stone guilty
Many more to follow soon
Draining the swamp eh?
Haiku # 66419, November 15, 2019 12:38 pm ET
by Jesus is lard
To write a Haiku!
Ahh... to feel the wind blowing
Out of your own ass.
Haiku # 66418, November 14, 2019 8:02 pm ET
by Out of Gas
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