No one would expect 
Someone with such a huge ass
Could outrun a train
by Blood of On the tracks 
 
			
Four pieces French toast,
eight bacon strips, lemonade.
The fat woman belched.
Was it an earthquake?
Baritone eructation.
Startling gut horn.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
You will fight the train....
And you will kick much train ass
Show 'em who's in charge
by Ann Nonymous 
 
			
Flattened by the train 
Something to look forward to 
See, there's always hope
by Someone you know of Wrong side of the tracks  
 
			
Umlaut breaks Haiku
My work now forever gone!
Tilde "A" remains.
by Wang Lowfan of Kalistan 
 
			
Man-Tank of Hong Kong
Part machine, part Ã
by Wang Lowfan of Kalistan 
 
			
Serrated Knife
Like Lemongrass Bordering
An Infant's Cradle
by Who Do of Smegmoo 
 
			
The Hong Kong Tank Men
Dare to fight to against evil
As the world watches....
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia 
 
			
Hollywood venal
Communist boot licker's
Bow down to money!
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia 
 
			
NBA Chicoms!
Be sure to keep your mouths shut
And master happy!
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia 
 
			
Drink coffee all day
Then can' sleep a wink at night
Damn caffeine junkie!
by Walt Tripp of Hogs Back Woods 
 
			
The Great Pig Escape
Oinking from all directions 
God damn foolishness
by Sausage dink  of Undisclosed  
 
			
A lifetime of this
Waiting for the end of life
Thank you for your time
by Nobody of In particular  
 
			
Contemplating it
Since the day after Woodstock 
Lentil flatulence
by Al Gassedup of Nowhere near a restroom 
 
			
Braided nostril hairs.
Silly old millenials.
Too lazy to pluck.
Wannabe hippies.
Nostril dreadlock mucus drips.
Nasal honey pot.
And the chicks dig it.
One on either side of him.
Nibbling the strands.
by Burning Man of Dying of thirst in the dessert.  Oh, wait, here's a beer.  Only $20?  Okay! 
 
			
Burgers make you fat.
Chick-Fil-Et is anti-gay.
Instead, eat tacos.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Furry pussy cat
Purring like a house on fire
When she has been fed.
by My Kitty Likes Purina
 
			
Flappy pussy skin
Swaying like a pendulum
When she's excited
by Sittin on the cock of The bay 
 
			
I dare say, Vicar:
Quite a lovely toast-rack there
She's spot-on, brilliant.
by Sir James Saville of Anglo-Saxon Necrophilia 
 
			
I'm a drop lyrikz:
drop them right ON you white ass
(since I too am white).
by Da Haiku Pimp of Street Kredz 
 
			
One of the spouses 
Likes to pee in the coffee 
Of the other spouse
by Divorced of Coffee Break 
 
			
Sand in the ass crack
Egg salad aftertaste 
Brian Wilson is stoned
by Beach Bum of Beach 
 
			
Ha ha. I caused you
To break the rules of Haiku.
Admit: you're triggered
by Heap Big Medicine of Great Spirit  
 
			
I forgot thump.
There are others, but not so common.
Frump for example.  A dull or unattractive woman.
by Trump is a frump.
 
			
bump chump clump dump grump hump jump lump mumps plump rump stump trump
I have the best words.
No one else has words like these.
High quality words.
by repubtard worshiping orange baboon of Legalize pussy grabbing now! 
 
			
Yes! We took out Trump!
Wait...Pence is now the president?
Hmmmm . . . wait a second.
by Impulse-Driven Libtard of Low Information 
 
			
White dude acting black
You are the new Al Jolson 
Of the internet
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
President Mike Pence
Get used to saying that phrase
It is what it is
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Y'all niggaz rayciss.
Be hatin on my boy TRUMP.
Straight-up rayciss. Damn.
by Marcus Garvey's Secretary
 
			
Jesus done turnt Kool-Aid to Mad Dog.
I seened it wit my own eyes.
Turnt a tampon into a blunt.
Whole house fulla niggas got FUCKED up!
Dats da troof!
by Friendly neighborhood homie.
 
			
I ain't no cracka!
You cracka-ass prison bitch.
Bust you wide open!
by Jesus, your Lord and Savior. of Preachin' it on the mountain! 
 
			
Y'all aint no Jesus.
I'M Jesus, you bitch-ass ho.
Damn. Cracka-ass poet.
by Booker T. Washington of Profanity 
 
			
Carp and tar.
Scum fish and cigarettes.
Mad dog 20/20.
by Jesus Christ, your Lord and Savior of ... but I ain't gonna die fo' yo' sins this time, bitches. Save yo' own damn sef!  Damn crackas anyhow. 
 
			
Fun Fact:
The Ancient Greek noun tekton is a common term for an artisan/craftsman, in particular a carpenter, wood-worker, mason, builder, teacher, or engineer.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Fuck tiny keyboard :
carpenteR
by Eat my Theology
 
			
Antichrist filth: die.
Just lay down and die right now.
You will not be missed.
by Loving Disciple of Fluffy White Lamb of God the Groovy Carpentet 
 
			
Kim Kardashian!
If she runs for president,
I will vote for her.
by Admit it, she would be awesome! of White House reality TV!  Pay-per-view.  No more deficit. 
 
			
Your politics gay
Left wing and right wing gay
Homo Politricks
by Gay Ass  of Anarchville 
 
			
Dragon's breath reeking
War torn home desolation
Dad is drinking again
by Youngster of Black Eye 
 
			
Are you kidding me?
HILLARY will run again?
Democrat Brain Death.
by Seth Rich of Arkancided 
 
			
Oh, high and mighty
political fuzzy nuts
presidential putz.
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Yo wussup Hector...
Check out ma new coche, meng.
Damn. It full of smoke!
by Hector's boy Flaco of Chillin in Parking Lot 
 
			
Searching for advice
Inside a fortune cookie
Empty: speaks volumes
by Oh Wao
 
			
My Haiku, your face:
rearranging, leaves no trace
here in cyberspace
by Satori of Fist 
 
			
It's necessary.
Bad haiku's necessary.
Says so to the left.
by Left of Box above Name 
 
			
Scatological
Maneuverability;
Spring rains bring mudslides.
by X-Lax of The bowl 
 
			
To Child of Divorce:
The boat will rock in the storm,
Maybe kill yourself?
by Doc Kevorkian of Seatle  
 
			
Tyrannosaurus
Had feathers bright and lovely
Eat my ass Spielberg
by Angry Paleontologist of University of Utah 
 
			
Ceasefire starts peacetime
The air is still and silent
The car ride is long
by Child of Divorce of Splitsville  
 
			
Impeach Trump Libtard's
Don't worry about doing- work!
Four more years baby!
by Richard Jewell of Down south