BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
350 Days
68533 Haikus
I scanned my asshole.
Printed it on photo stock.
Jacked off onto it.

Folded it neatly.
Mailed it to Donald Trump.
Hope he enjoys it.
Haiku #63604, by df
April 10, 2019 9:13 pm ET

Would you like to try?
I've got some cum left for you.
Don't try to resist.
Haiku #63603, by Deliverance banjo theme plays in background.
April 10, 2019 9:09 pm ET

There are no other
dicks around here wroth sucking.
*wipes off chin with grin.
Haiku #63602, by df of Nantucket
April 10, 2019 9:06 pm ET

Call me Arnold Layne.
You wouldn't understand that.
Not without Google.
Haiku #63601, by df
April 10, 2019 9:03 pm ET

He came in his mouth
But that didn't make him gay
Sucking his dick did
Haiku #63600, by Evidence of Foul play
April 10, 2019 8:38 pm ET

Verdant spring flowers,
fertilized by Darth's feces.
Smell like rotten cum.
Haiku #63599, by My name is Darth Figpucker of and I approve this message.
April 10, 2019 8:34 pm ET

Well, I guess there's farts.
But farts area kind of like poop.
Butt-related stuff.
Haiku #63598, by Darth Figpucker.
April 10, 2019 8:32 pm ET

Bleeding brain, mosquitoes,
poop, jacking off, Asian porn,
drugs and blasphemy.
Haiku #63597, by What else is there?!
April 10, 2019 8:29 pm ET

Hi, my name is Darth
and I am a Pig Fucker.
Been two weeks without.
Haiku #63596, by Darth Figpucker of Pig Fuckers Anonymous Meeting, Nashville Chapter
April 10, 2019 8:24 pm ET

Oh verdant spring life
ye gentle flowers and rills
where's my freaking phone?
Haiku #63595, by Phoney Baloney of Macaroni
April 10, 2019 4:24 pm ET

I came in my mouth
But it didn't taste like mine
It tasted like yours
Haiku #63594, by Archbishop of Canterbury
April 10, 2019 12:50 pm ET

Wouldn't it be nice
By visiting this website
Be cured of sickness
Haiku #63593, by Anonymous Poet
April 10, 2019 9:41 am ET

Look at me right now.
Right now in my eyes. Good. Breathe...
Listen to my thoughts!
Haiku #63592, by Your friendly local satanic psychopath with a black hood on
April 10, 2019 8:49 am ET

some psychedelic furs right there
if you recognise me, look my way
Haiku #63591, by vhs
April 10, 2019 8:37 am ET

Lets gang up on Darth
boycott poop and jerk-off verse
(but it's all he knows!)
Haiku #63590, by Anonymous Poet
April 10, 2019 8:24 am ET


Haiku #63589, by John Bender of my dad gave me cigarettes for my birthday
April 10, 2019 1:28 am ET

This world is hard-cruel
Don't expect to get a chance.
No disappointment.
Haiku #63588, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
April 10, 2019 1:12 am ET

I will keep my sins.
Thank you very fucking much.
My ticket to hell.
Haiku #63587, by Darth Figpucker of Goddamn I hate selecting crosswalks.
April 9, 2019 11:37 pm ET

This website is weird
Kinda like the Breakfast Club
But we re all poets
Haiku #63586, by Starkitten of Dandruff Snowstorm
April 9, 2019 11:00 pm ET

O, moist holy slit
Pardon Figpucker his sins
Cleanse him with tuna
Haiku #63585, by Demon of Steeple
April 9, 2019 9:27 pm ET

Growing a moustache
Wish it would grow all over
In stripes, like a cat
Haiku #63584, by Wanda B.
April 9, 2019 9:26 pm ET

I want / need coffee.
Is it want or is it need?
Only the Holy Cunt of Zargoth know that!
Go ask it!
Haiku #63583, by
April 9, 2019 9:24 pm ET

I looked in your eyes
I saw your disappointment
And then I punched you
Haiku #63582, by Pow of Kisser
April 9, 2019 9:23 pm ET

Be more tolerant!
I can't help that my brain has
a menstrual cycle.

Think I should use pads?
Big question, wing or no wings?
Red Bull cunt rocket.

The Minstrel Menstrual Motor Cycle In The Gallery.
He once owned a Harley Davidson, and a Triumph Bonneville.
Counted his friend in, used up tampons.
Prays that he always will.
Haiku #63581, by Darth Figpucker of Feeling Tully today.
April 9, 2019 9:20 pm ET

They won t stop talking
I told the psychiatrist
Who won t?
My farts, silly!
Haiku #63580, by Beanie of Toilet bowl
April 9, 2019 9:18 pm ET

They won t stop talking
I told the psychiatrist
Who won
Haiku #63579, by Beanie of Toilet bowl
April 9, 2019 9:18 pm ET

Atomic Fireballs
Dump the whole box in my mouth
Look at my red tongue
Haiku #63578, by SK of pNW
April 9, 2019 9:10 pm ET

"look into my eyes"
That's just so fucking creepy
Worst one on here yet
Haiku #63577, by Look between my thighs
April 9, 2019 9:09 pm ET

fine fuck ok im
here, i was tired of fart
jokes and brain bleeds, geeze
Haiku #63576, by vhs
April 9, 2019 8:25 pm ET

Oversized pink comb
Carried in your back pocket
Let s see you use it
Haiku #63575, by Catch me of Outside
April 9, 2019 6:19 pm ET

Men stru al blood
Rich, flavorful pizza sauce
Delivered monthly
Haiku #63574, by Red of Connecticut
April 9, 2019 6:17 pm ET

If I were a whore
I would charge a thousand bucks
To just jack you off
Haiku #63573, by Product of My environment
April 9, 2019 6:14 pm ET

Failed expectations
Fathers mistakes repeated
Teenagers suck ass!
Haiku #63572, by Ledge of Kentucky
April 9, 2019 6:14 pm ET

Check under your bed
Don t be surprised when you find
This horny midget
Haiku #63571, by Horny midget of Under bed
April 9, 2019 6:14 pm ET

Check under your bed
Haiku #63570, by Horny midget of Under bed
April 9, 2019 6:13 pm ET

Mad Mushroom Pizza
Tasted good on my burnt tongue
Your lips are better!
Haiku #63569, by Ledge of Kentucky
April 9, 2019 6:12 pm ET

Semen on your hands?
You will grow hair on your palms
Look into my eyes
Haiku #63568, by Anonymous Poet
April 9, 2019 6:10 pm ET

There's no argument
Expression through taking shits
Like writing poems
Haiku #63567, by Excuse me, I mean taking Tootsie Rolls.
April 9, 2019 6:08 pm ET

Mathematics Spears!
Galvanizing rhetoric
Simple Love Cedric!
Haiku #63566, by Ledge of Kentucky
April 9, 2019 6:04 pm ET

If I saw man hands
naked, I'd have to fuck her
blackmail leverage
Haiku #63565, by Ledge of Kentucky
April 9, 2019 6:00 pm ET

Seen limping away
Caravan of so called "poets"
Look into my eyes
Haiku #63564, by Poetry Robot of Front and center
April 9, 2019 5:27 pm ET

We can all agree
Expression through poetry
Like taking a shit
Haiku #63563, by Grunt of Oval of office
April 9, 2019 2:32 pm ET

The cars got smaller
Just get the windows tinted
Jerk off something
Haiku #63562, by Memory Lane
April 9, 2019 9:41 am ET

Meng Chiao and Li Po
will kick our sorry asses
for writing this stuff
Haiku #63561, by Omens and Fantasms of Malevolence from Tiger Cloud-Forest
April 9, 2019 9:19 am ET

First time held her hand
Can't remember what movie
Felt like a rocket
Haiku #63560, by Found her pic online 40 years later of She is STILL super HOT !
April 9, 2019 9:12 am ET

Conceived in back seats
Parked. Steaming up the windows
When we had sex drives
Haiku #63559, by All coming back to me of Boone's Farm
April 9, 2019 7:24 am ET

Judah and Tamar:
for a goat and signet ring
he notarized it.
Haiku #63558, by Genesis 38 of Highway To Heaven
April 9, 2019 7:22 am ET

If you want to fook
just fook- ask for permission
Get it notarized.

That way- no go jail
What hellish! modern! bull chit!
I miss the sixties
Haiku #63557, by Rolang of Hell I wouldn't know
April 9, 2019 5:14 am ET

Reikan Buddha Eye
Indication- you can see
Things that others can't
Haiku #63556, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
April 9, 2019 5:03 am ET

Meng Chiao saw ghosts
put down his verse to explain
What most never see.
Haiku #63555, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
April 9, 2019 4:51 am ET