Er, hop shuffle step
Ball change ball change, hop shuffle..
I will never stop

I don

Electricity
I use it to zap houseguests
Who use my toilet

Cats are partying
A fine dime bag of catnip
Tails wave like glow sticks

Sucking a lemon
At the trumpet recital
Laughing in my sleeve

a man told me some
thing but, the thing he told me
was just some more words

Muh Diversity
Waah! Waah! Muh Identity...
Feminism. SKREEEECH!

That's right, Wong Lofan
Venezuela's an old house
falling apart fast...

Watch it fall apart
If you learn to enjoy it
It makes life easy

The rotten bastards
Were supposed to fix the house
They fooked it up worse

It seems those days
No one knows their GD job
incompetent fools!

Most Americans
have no idea about
Venezuela's fate

Dull behaviorists
Pavlov and B.F. Skinner.
What a bunch of twits.

aw who am i kidding
responses stimulus and
do it all over

sit back to camp go
fishing real people, fuck this
this is meaningless

something like blah blah blah
yada yada yada
pretty much this is

there is nothing more
to say but quietly send
the clowns far away

intimidation
and offense, unashamed
of their evil ways

Cry crocodile tears
Go now, cry in your stale beers
Cry me a river

Investigators
They come from Florida
Reptiles. Stocks and Bonds

nothing to guess pearls thrown
to swine are trampled then they
turn to rend others

Are the waffles blue
And if so, that is your clue
The chef was guess who

waffle house is just
freaking heaven and i dont
talk food too much, y'all

Oh not this again
Someone said we breathe the farts
Of Adolph Hitler

The Hero returns
Fresh battle scars and tall tales
But now, let us feast!

Only one person
talks about poo rubbing off...
And who might that be?

Someone

Is this really true?
Their greatness rubs off on you?
How about the poo?

Don't usually do this but I though of all of you fellow Haikooks:

(...When you write a haiku, the masters from Matsuo Basho to Kobayashi Issa are also remembered, and your readers give a mental nod in their direction. Some of their excellence rubs off on your work, merely through you applying the discipline of the form.)

from M. Bijman:
https://sevencircumstances.com/poetry-and-lyrics/why-i-hate-poetry/

Time waits for no one-
its a damn good fooking thing
when times up- thats it.

I held open-door
She said "chivalry not dead"
Was thinking.. with head

Home depot or hell?
Wander around- can't find chit
Hell same--as depot-

Caveman rebellion:
Time to storm projection room
(Plato's Cave Act II)

there comes a time when
real life wins, no answer back
no more platos cave

i still get mad at
the critiques out there but you
know this...learn to code

censorship on line
the modern terror, gulags
empty headed skulls

move on from the plat
form that mocks thy content and
let then speak to void

And for no reason
People just started hugging
All over the world

I've said it before
You know I'll say it again
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt!

Remember the time
You took the axe from your trunk
Fun in the graveyard

Eagles hate the man
He emulates seagull style
Falls flat on his face

if iran is so far
away, and it could not get
away, oh wrong lyrics!

Meow and meow
Will anyone hear me now
Lost up in this tree?

Don't mind if I do
One person with junk of two
Give myself a screw

Intersectional
Cisgender-based buzz
Pure incoherence

Starkitten! Descend.
Come down off of that tree branch.
You are way too high.

Intoxicating
Fizzy Haiku Elixir
Don

Haiku will save us.
Haiku will defeat evil.
Count syllables. Yup.

Let the poems flow
Something for everyone here
Don't give up on it

The only reason
Haiku has been ridiculed
It's ridiculous

This wrinkly flesh rod
The patent holder is God
The Holy Boomstick