Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 135 Days and 76968 Haiku later...

Bureaucratic bloat
Calls for drastic dieting;
Extend the shutdown!
Haiku # 61680, January 16, 2019 11:44 am ET
by Crushin' the Illusion of Russian Collusion
Poem residue
The clue led to your arrest
Bad Haiku Killer
Haiku # 61679, January 16, 2019 3:47 am ET
by Matlock of Golden Girlz orgy
I so love my ku
be it hi or goodbye ku
Go on and try ku
Haiku # 61678, January 15, 2019 10:55 pm ET
by Put it in neutral
Just got pulled over
There goes my Ubereats pay
Many, many cold fries
Haiku # 61677, January 15, 2019 10:40 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Stop fighting about G O D
That dude hates all of us
No argument there
Haiku # 61676, January 15, 2019 9:25 pm ET
by Smote Avoider of Running the other direction
Wedding day blues
Walking down the aisle, farting
Till death, you'll share farts
Haiku # 61675, January 15, 2019 8:29 pm ET
by Single of Not Looking
Cafeteria
This time drink milk up your nose
You crave attention
Haiku # 61674, January 15, 2019 8:25 pm ET
by Pop your lunchbag
Fetal alcohol
Feral children of two drunks
They all had pin heads
Haiku # 61673, January 15, 2019 8:23 pm ET
by Neighbour of Hood
Lofan, nude, at door
Bearing coffee and doughnuts
Phallus of Ring Toss
Haiku # 61671, January 15, 2019 3:19 am ET
by Busty Barb
Barnyard behemoth
Birdbrain challenge to screw it
Snorting, Raging Bull
Haiku # 61670, January 15, 2019 1:04 am ET
by Aging Bull Robbed of my dinero of TriBeCa
By day I hoist hay
Finger fuck farmer's daughter
Until the cock's crow
Haiku # 61669, January 15, 2019 12:57 am ET
by Hired hand
Stopped for sustenance
Rotten crane eggs guzzled raw
Flexing my muscle
Haiku # 61668, January 15, 2019 12:55 am ET
by Hired hand
I alone, a god
raise high the bleeding trophy:
Haiku's severed head.
Haiku # 61667, January 14, 2019 7:13 pm ET
by Where did y'all go?
If could crank out
Six bad haikus per second
I sure would do it.
Haiku # 61666, January 14, 2019 7:08 pm ET
by Belt-Fed Automatic Onslaught of Military-Grade Haiku
If Lofan turns out
to be Figpucker again
I will have a cow
Haiku # 61665, January 14, 2019 7:01 pm ET
by Darth F of the Lyrical Water Closet
Can't stop just can't stop
I need more and more RIGHT NOW
Oh God, bring it on
Haiku # 61664, January 14, 2019 6:58 pm ET
by Having Haiku Relapse of Please Call Poetic Intervention 4 Me
Busty Bus, ye are
nuthin' more than a HARLOT,
you foul Jezebel
Haiku # 61663, January 14, 2019 6:55 pm ET
by Tempt not the Master of Haiku
Now PREACH IT, sister.
Haiku goin' to bring them down
to the pit of HAIL !
Haiku # 61662, January 14, 2019 6:53 pm ET
by Snake-handlin' Church of Haiku
Haiku done bit me!
Oh Lordy I jess caint stop.
Clem, pass that bottle . . .
Haiku # 61661, January 14, 2019 6:48 pm ET
by Old-timer hidin' frum the Haiku fedral agints of Appalachian Moonshine
I remember you
I was hoping you
Haiku # 61660, January 14, 2019 6:46 pm ET
by Busty Bus Passenger
It was proof of God.
(Just like that Norwegian girl
With the grape lip-gloss)
Haiku # 61659, January 14, 2019 6:42 pm ET
by Nostalgia of Melancholic Memory of of Distant Past is Better
On that bus to AZ:
Guadalupe Huerta was her name
She sat next to me...
Haiku # 61658, January 14, 2019 6:38 pm ET
by And I almost lost it she was so gorgeous
Old Lofan . . . alone.
Contemplating Aztec boobs
from wise mountain-view.
Haiku # 61657, January 14, 2019 6:36 pm ET
by Imaginary Painting of Han Dynasty with Enchiladas
French fried monkey meat
Compliments of the house, sir
World's Oldest Virgin
Haiku # 61656, January 14, 2019 5:34 pm ET
by Honored guest at funny table of Under table shaking hands with your member
Lofan tell tall tales
Penis never been unwrapped
Now past Best Buy Date
Haiku # 61655, January 14, 2019 5:32 pm ET
by U know who of Peeking
Young Lofan- happy!
Many fine Chicas like Wong!
to bad Lofan- old...

In past days of yore
Lofan roamed the whole wide world
Chase girls and drink beer!

Now those days are gone
Wong Lofan sad oldster
Living in a hut.
Haiku # 61654, January 14, 2019 5:27 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Poet got horny
That's not tits. Those are his balls
You need an eye test

Understandable
Lay off the masturbation
You're losing your sight
Haiku # 61653, January 14, 2019 5:24 pm ET
by Huge right hand of Why?
That Mexican girl
is MY angel and goddess.
Smile now, cry later...
Haiku # 61652, January 14, 2019 5:05 pm ET
by Virgin of Guadalupe's Hot Cousin
Haiku dissipates
the one thousand things of beer.
Until they return.
Haiku # 61651, January 14, 2019 5:03 pm ET
by Fong Lowan of Tsing Tao
Boob-gazing Lofan:
You have evoked the wrath of
Chalchiuhtlicue
Haiku # 61650, January 14, 2019 4:56 pm ET
by Coffee-tits of Azteca Abundance
Mictēcacihuātl
Haiku # 61649, January 14, 2019 4:51 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
She served me coffee
And leaned down low on the bar
Her boobs! Outstanding!
Haiku # 61648, January 14, 2019 4:28 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
That Mexican girl
Has the Azz of a Goddess
And the soul of a Angel
Haiku # 61647, January 14, 2019 4:04 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Curtain of thick fog
Won't be caught wanking today
Blow jizz all over
Haiku # 61646, January 14, 2019 3:58 pm ET
by Mayor Mcjizz
Cool beans amazeballs
Gwynneth Paltrow's steamed scrod cunt
Indescribable
Haiku # 61645, January 14, 2019 3:54 pm ET
by Bro
So lovely her face
Just one look can break your heart
Do not lose your mind.
Haiku # 61644, January 14, 2019 3:54 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Drank all of the beer
In Japan and Korea
Now its black coffee
Haiku # 61643, January 14, 2019 3:45 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Used to roam the world
Now a beat up old bastard
Never leave the yard
Haiku # 61642, January 14, 2019 3:34 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Used to roam the world
Now a best up old bastard
Never leave the yard
Haiku # 61641, January 14, 2019 3:22 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Haunted damn condo
Every thing broken
Every fooking day
Haiku # 61640, January 14, 2019 3:17 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
I hear it a lot
but what does it really mean:
Weaponized Autism?
Haiku # 61639, January 14, 2019 11:53 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
The same old same old...
Same farts in elevators.
Dude--get over it.
Haiku # 61638, January 14, 2019 8:45 am ET
by Your Eminence of Flatulence
I can see it now
Dinosaurs of the old world
Having relations
Haiku # 61637, January 14, 2019 7:54 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northmoist
Woot woot!
Haiku # 61636, January 14, 2019 5:24 am ET
by Admin
As rare as hens' teeth
Good old fashioned poetry
Every poet stinks
Haiku # 61635, January 14, 2019 3:20 am ET
by Grandma Poet of Dildo Aisle
Who runs this web site
Probably old Juggaloes
Ringing Sevice Bell
Haiku # 61634, January 14, 2019 1:00 am ET
by Customer of Customer service
I'm so excited
I won first place this weekend
Smelly Ass Award
Haiku # 61633, January 14, 2019 12:57 am ET
by Win Win Situation of Elevator
Packed in like sardines
Stench in the elevator
I farted HA HA!
Haiku # 61632, January 13, 2019 11:21 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yanking it so hard
Can
Haiku # 61631, January 13, 2019 10:24 pm ET
by Chin hair puller
Hansel and Gretel
Left a Diarrhea Trail
Wiped their bums with bread
Haiku # 61630, January 13, 2019 9:37 pm ET
by Story time of Library
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