Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 135 Days and 76968 Haiku later...

Wonka wonka woo
Now thrusting dance on table
Crashing to the floor
Haiku # 61492, January 4, 2019 4:19 am ET
by Eddie's mom of Dive Bar
Relax. Visualize.
Captain and Tenille screwing
Muskrat in rear end
Haiku # 61491, January 4, 2019 4:18 am ET
by Guided Relaxation of Floor
Cancan dancers kick
Who opened the tuna fish?
From row seats fishy
Haiku # 61490, January 4, 2019 4:15 am ET
by Audience of Front Row
Gates of Good Fortune
Wide open like your sister
Without the fish smell
Haiku # 61489, January 4, 2019 2:17 am ET
by Tally Whacker of Corner of Cockles and Mussels
Camel had a toe
Hot sand. Million miles to go
Dry hump Dry hump hump
Haiku # 61488, January 4, 2019 2:14 am ET
by Dry Hump of Hump
Word in name congealed
Left a bad taste in your mouth
Find nearest spittoon
Haiku # 61487, January 4, 2019 12:13 am ET
by Sal Iva
Dickens cider
Haiku # 61486, January 3, 2019 9:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Trying to get some
Dickens
Haiku # 61485, January 3, 2019 9:07 pm ET
by Surf, Turf, and Afterbirth of Produce
Great Expectations
Dissolved by reality
VeneREAL LIFE
Haiku # 61484, January 3, 2019 9:04 pm ET
by Pip trying to get Dickens of Some dusty pub
Dickensian twins . . .
their names: Ignorance and Want.
Did you mean those two?
Haiku # 61483, January 3, 2019 7:56 pm ET
by Sale of Two Titties
Abuse and Neglect
Expecting twins? Perfect names.
Congratulations!
Haiku # 61482, January 3, 2019 6:26 pm ET
by Living Abortion
Come see my belle chose
Give the lotion. Give the hose.
C'est la vie en rose
Haiku # 61481, January 3, 2019 5:28 pm ET
by Frenchy of Oooooo la la
A fragrant French whore
beckons me to approach
and empty my balls
Haiku # 61480, January 3, 2019 4:47 pm ET
by Packing Master of NYC
I ain't no sex doll
I'm the Michelin Tire Man
Got rubbers covered
Haiku # 61479, January 3, 2019 4:42 pm ET
by Complimentary Lube of Busy Corner
That sex-joke punchline:
Those two inflatable dolls
Wait. Let me think first
Haiku # 61478, January 3, 2019 3:32 pm ET
by Her breath inside of me
It's necessary.
Submit to my bad haiku.
Submit to Islam.
Haiku # 61477, January 3, 2019 3:30 pm ET
by Taqiyya of Submission
Yo it aint like dat . . .
aint like dat at ALL, gnome sain?
People be like: damn.
Haiku # 61476, January 3, 2019 3:27 pm ET
by Guy about to shoot you because you got the WalMart parking space and he kind of violent
Oh bright liquid fire
Temple elixir of bliss . . .
what was I saying ?
Haiku # 61475, January 3, 2019 3:23 pm ET
by Loku Wi-Fi of Pseudo-oriental Splendors
Oh haiku maidens
Oh ye nine mini-muses
Draw near and inspire
Haiku # 61474, January 3, 2019 3:20 pm ET
by Asahi EXTRA-DRY of Sapporo 生 発泡酒 More Please
Hey all you damn kids
Get the hell out of my yard.
This is MY haiku
Haiku # 61473, January 3, 2019 3:14 pm ET
by Foul-tempered old coot shuffling around his filthy kitchen trying to find his hearing aid

Word in Name concealed.
Let her slip or got her peeled:
Hannah Banana !
Haiku # 61472, January 3, 2019 3:10 pm ET
by El Platano of Guineo Tropical
Poetry Robot
Annual lubrication
Non-friction section
Haiku # 61471, January 3, 2019 3:56 am ET
by Poetry Robot of Ork
Been laid up with piles
Couldn
Haiku # 61470, January 3, 2019 2:09 am ET
by Mack of Rig
Name in word revealed
Reeled in an eel. Electric.
Oh that was so real
Haiku # 61469, January 2, 2019 8:57 pm ET
by Bicycle Thieves of Outside restaurant
Name in word revealed:
re-revealed in veal cutlet
vegan veggie veal
Haiku # 61468, January 2, 2019 7:38 pm ET
by Milk-Fed Vegetables of Lyrical Transcendence
Too late just caint stop
haiku-itis got my soul
OH LORDY! Help me
Haiku # 61467, January 2, 2019 7:36 pm ET
by Mammy Haiku of Chitlin Circuit with a cloth on her head
Asinine Donkey !
Lick my assurance of fame.
Bear my burden, beast.
Haiku # 61466, January 2, 2019 7:32 pm ET
by Braying Quadruped of Who You Are
Ma haiku homies
I'm a send them roun u place
bust u fukin haid
Haiku # 61465, January 2, 2019 7:27 pm ET
by Thaddeus Snodgrass of a Golden Cup of Claret and Thou
just type and type and
type and type and type and type,
then count syllables
Haiku # 61464, January 2, 2019 7:24 pm ET
by Polysyllabic Quintessentiality of the Pseudo-epigraphically Explicit
The new year arrives
filled with harmonious joy:
Thunderous dark fart
Haiku # 61463, January 2, 2019 7:20 pm ET
by Name: of Location: Preview
Orifice of doom
Filthy oracular hole:
your poetic mouth
Haiku # 61462, January 2, 2019 7:16 pm ET
by Name of Location
Oh poets! New wine
New snowstorms of crystal verse . . .
New disposable
Haiku # 61461, January 2, 2019 7:15 pm ET
by Please consider purchase of Fuxiang gentlemens wristwatch factory
Gary Busey fart
It's been known to clear a room
Guacamole Time
Haiku # 61460, January 2, 2019 6:48 pm ET
by Jennifer Garner of Hollywood, CA
Stay Tuned. coming Soon.
Chinese year of the long pig
Might as well bend over
Haiku # 61459, January 2, 2019 3:51 pm ET
by Nostradongus of Predictable location
Hail twenty-nineteen;
a new year to get buried
in Figpucker's waste.
Haiku # 61458, January 2, 2019 12:40 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Go ahead, do it
Reach way down in my pocket
Misshapen Werthers
Haiku # 61457, January 2, 2019 3:06 am ET
by Sucker of Grandpa
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku # 61456, January 1, 2019 12:01 am ET
by Cuntfart of Cunt
Dick Clark back to work!
Ghoul Balls filled with Lust
Midnight Comes Ghoul Dust
Haiku # 61455, December 31, 2018 11:35 pm ET
by Run for your lives of NYC
Customer Service
I
Haiku # 61454, December 31, 2018 10:19 pm ET
by Real Poet of Head in Clouds ( and oven)
Dick Clark awakens
Shake off the dusty dirt nap
Like, Rut-Ro SCOOBY!
Haiku # 61453, December 31, 2018 12:31 pm ET
by K. Kasem
Haiku will save us.
Haiku is the last frontier.
Haiku for freedom.
Haiku # 61452, December 31, 2018 8:11 am ET
by Haiku criminalized by overlords of Globalist Technocracy
That old New York Times
crumpled up into a ball:
Great firestarter
Haiku # 61451, December 31, 2018 8:06 am ET
by Alterna-rag of Metro-Hype
end of this stale year
start of yet another one
whoop de fucking do
Haiku # 61450, December 31, 2018 7:48 am ET
by ash
He's such a foul mess
Genesis: Peas porridge hot
Peas porridge cold
Haiku # 61449, December 31, 2018 7:39 am ET
by Neil Megson of Throbbing Psychic TV Gristle
Bone spurs bone spurs ouch
Bone spurs bone spurs ouch boo Hoo
The best bone spurs (whine)
Haiku # 61448, December 30, 2018 10:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Injured on the job?
Writer's cramp from Bad Haiku?
Call our Hotline NOW!
Haiku # 61447, December 30, 2018 4:00 am ET
by Law offices of Cuntfart Cuntfart & Cunt of Roast Beef Boulevard
Y'all are crazy here
I write poems that make sense
Is this real haiku?
Haiku # 61446, December 30, 2018 3:52 am ET
by Inez
I
Haiku # 61445, December 29, 2018 11:38 pm ET
by Norma L.
Pronounced erection
Possible priapism
Willing, Wet walrus
Haiku # 61444, December 29, 2018 11:32 pm ET
by Whoa
Go ahead. Do it.
YOLO. Jump in and do it.
Fuck the gorilla
Haiku # 61443, December 29, 2018 11:29 pm ET
by Unusual Zookeeper of Zoo
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