BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years
70 Days
and
69706 Haikus
later...
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I'd be shit-faced drunk,
Lying in my own vomit.
But no, calculus.
Haiku #60683
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 10:22 am ET
And sadly, of course,
if you read my haiku, then
you can smell my corpse.
Haiku #60682
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 10:06 am ET
What's amazing is
that when I read your haiku,
I can see your corpse.
Haiku #60681
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 10:04 am ET
It is nothing new.
When I look in the mirror
I see my own corpse.
Haiku #60680
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 10:02 am ET
One, two, three, four, five.
Count them! Five. Five Syllables!
MWAH HAH HAH HA HAAAH!
*Boom crackle crash*
Haiku #60679
, by The Count of Sesame Street
November 2, 2018 10:00 am ET
Severed limbs still twitch;
Wet blood sprayed on walls,clotting . . .
You see your own corpse
Haiku #60678
, by Out of Patience Out of Inspiration of Out of Body Experience
November 2, 2018 9:58 am ET
We love Haiku more
than life itself. Look within:
Empty eye sockets
Haiku #60677
, by the light of November Moon SICK of HAIKU
November 2, 2018 9:51 am ET
Drink from filthy skull!
Drink fresh blood of bad haiku.
Golden hordes rampant.
Haiku #60676
, by Chinkis Khan loves DJT of Haiku will violate your crypt, rip out your soul
November 2, 2018 9:45 am ET
I alone remain
Surveying Haiku corpse-mound:
stench of foul verses
Haiku #60675
, by Blue + Red = RED of Red + 1 = TRUTH
November 2, 2018 9:39 am ET
Quiet on the front.
Time to reload Haiku guns.
Bad verse: shoot to kill
Haiku #60674
, by REDREDREDREDREDRED (blue) REDREDRED
November 2, 2018 9:34 am ET
Stop writing Haiku?
Pry phone from my cold dead hands.
I'll write from the grave.
Haiku #60673
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:34 am ET
Did I mention TRUMP?
The greatest statesman ever:
The Orange green light!
Haiku #60672
, by voting RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED
November 2, 2018 7:29 am ET
Nationalism:
It's the new globalism
So suck it, Lemon
Haiku #60671
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:24 am ET
Orange Donald juice
With a big bag of Cheetos:
crunch crunch crunch crunch YES!
Haiku #60670
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:06 am ET
Will kill for Orange.
Worse yet: will write bad haiku.
Fear the coming storm!
Haiku #60669
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:01 am ET
Orange! Orange or
Plunge into globalist hell...
More Orange please, sir.
Haiku #60668
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 6:59 am ET
Your/my only hope:
Cheeto administration.
Bow to Orange Man!
Haiku #60667
, by ba by ba by ba by of yeah yeah yeah
November 2, 2018 6:51 am ET
The syllables count.
That Oriental craftsmanship.
Haiku is SO dull.
Haiku #60666
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 6:48 am ET
You're wrong, vhs.
Since when did anything work?
Entropy is Lord.
Haiku #60665
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 5:34 am ET
Haiku go kaka
Haiku #60664
, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 4:54 am ET
I
Haiku #60663
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:17 pm ET
I
Haiku #60662
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:16 pm ET
I
Haiku #60661
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:09 pm ET
I
Haiku #60660
, by Back talker of Out Back
November 1, 2018 11:08 pm ET
I
Haiku #60659
, by Back talker of Out Back
November 1, 2018 11:07 pm ET
No toilet paper?
No problem. Just use Bad Haiku
5-7-5 ply
Haiku #60658
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:32 pm ET
My Haiku is hexed
Haiku #60657
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:30 pm ET
Even my ass crack
It
Haiku #60656
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:29 pm ET
i feel doomed, nothing
works, want to delete myself
everything is broken
including haiku
Haiku #60655
, by vhs
November 1, 2018 8:56 pm ET
Bending over now
Pendulous thang hanging low
Pick up my car keys
Haiku #60654
, by Varoom of Zoom Zoom
November 1, 2018 5:11 pm ET
Your verse inhabits
your own rectal cavity
its true place of birth
Haiku #60653
, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 3:41 pm ET
Actor Richard Gere
Is offering a reward
His gerbil went missing
Haiku #60652
, by Kidnapping this famous gerbil you might make me rich of Gerbil hunting
November 1, 2018 2:21 pm ET
My enormous cock
is too large for your tight ass.
Oh wait, there it goes.
Take that, you gerbil!
I rescued you from my ass
so I can bang yours.
Haiku #60651
, by DARTH FERBILGUCKER
November 1, 2018 5:57 am ET
Move to USA
President is a Cheeto
The place has gone nuts
Haiku #60650
, by Relocation Advisor of Americhaos
November 1, 2018 5:09 am ET
Guess who's on eBay?
Selling stale moon cake doorstops
For the holidays
Haiku #60649
, by Sleuth
November 1, 2018 5:07 am ET
Considering move.
The slums of Mogadishu?
Perhaps Australia?
Haiku #60648
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:29 am ET
Chicken Avenger.
Superhero, pecks out eyes
of chicken fuckers.
Haiku #60647
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:26 am ET
A fugitive, no.
Where I am, there are no laws.
I guess it's more fun.
As for VHS,
I'm sure that he's Cuntfart Cunt.
If not, don't tell me.
Haiku #60646
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:22 am ET
Incarcerated
VHS' situation
Darth: A fugitive
Haiku #60645
, by Hmmm
October 31, 2018 11:22 pm ET
Sometimes I wonder
Who you two gents really are
Got fuzzy viewer
Haiku #60644
, by Me
October 31, 2018 11:20 pm ET
I thought it was wax lips and malted milk balls in that bucket
Haiku #60643
, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 8:24 pm ET
Eagle Scout now, sir
I won the Scavenger Hunt
Aced Chicken fucking
Haiku #60642
, by Thanks to your YouTube tutorial of Scouts Honor. And on her
October 31, 2018 8:23 pm ET
Step into my van,
gullible helpful boy scout.
You will make great soup.
Haiku #60641
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 31, 2018 8:06 pm ET
The parents were pissed.
My candy bowl had a hole.
Through it I poked, well...
You know.
Haiku #60640
, by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I did not drop those shat in undies. I put them there purposely.
October 31, 2018 8:02 pm ET
Mr. Figoucker
You dropped these white underwear
With the big brown stain
Haiku #60639
, by Boy Scout of Crosswalk
October 31, 2018 6:12 pm ET
Foreskin and foreskin
And foreskin and foreskin and
Foreskin is Twentyskin
Haiku #60638
, by Please check my work, Prof. Figpucker of One room schoolhouse
October 31, 2018 6:08 pm ET
John Boy Walton
Haiku #60637
, by Press Agent of Pimple on Mr. Thomas
October 31, 2018 6:05 pm ET
Yo. Hear Ye Hear Ye
Please disregard my birthmark
Named Richard Thomas
Haiku #60636
, by John Boy Walton
October 31, 2018 6:03 pm ET
I cannot decide
how many children I'll eat
this fine Halloween.
Teeee Heeee heeee bwah ha
hooo hee hoo mwahhhhhh ha ha ho
heee *snort* *cackle* *fart*.
Haiku #60635
, by Cuntfart Cunt's twin sister.
October 31, 2018 5:51 pm ET
Glitch in the Matrix
Haiku #60634
, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 1:56 pm ET
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