BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
307 Days
and
65938 Haikus
later...
One, two, three, four, five.
Count them! Five. Five Syllables!
MWAH HAH HAH HA HAAAH!

*Boom crackle crash*
Haiku #60679, by The Count of Sesame Street
November 2, 2018 10:00 am ET

Severed limbs still twitch;
Wet blood sprayed on walls,clotting . . .
You see your own corpse
Haiku #60678, by Out of Patience Out of Inspiration of Out of Body Experience
November 2, 2018 9:58 am ET

We love Haiku more
than life itself. Look within:
Empty eye sockets
Haiku #60677, by the light of November Moon SICK of HAIKU
November 2, 2018 9:51 am ET

Drink from filthy skull!
Drink fresh blood of bad haiku.
Golden hordes rampant.
Haiku #60676, by Chinkis Khan loves DJT of Haiku will violate your crypt, rip out your soul
November 2, 2018 9:45 am ET

I alone remain
Surveying Haiku corpse-mound:
stench of foul verses
Haiku #60675, by Blue + Red = RED of Red + 1 = TRUTH
November 2, 2018 9:39 am ET

Quiet on the front.
Time to reload Haiku guns.
Bad verse: shoot to kill
Haiku #60674, by REDREDREDREDREDRED (blue) REDREDRED
November 2, 2018 9:34 am ET

Stop writing Haiku?
Pry phone from my cold dead hands.
I'll write from the grave.
Haiku #60673, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:34 am ET

Did I mention TRUMP?
The greatest statesman ever:
The Orange green light!
Haiku #60672, by voting RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED RED
November 2, 2018 7:29 am ET

Nationalism:
It's the new globalism
So suck it, Lemon
Haiku #60671, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:24 am ET

Orange Donald juice
With a big bag of Cheetos:
crunch crunch crunch crunch YES!
Haiku #60670, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:06 am ET

Will kill for Orange.
Worse yet: will write bad haiku.
Fear the coming storm!
Haiku #60669, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 7:01 am ET

Orange! Orange or
Plunge into globalist hell...
More Orange please, sir.
Haiku #60668, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 6:59 am ET

Your/my only hope:
Cheeto administration.
Bow to Orange Man!
Haiku #60667, by ba by ba by ba by of yeah yeah yeah
November 2, 2018 6:51 am ET

The syllables count.
That Oriental craftsmanship.
Haiku is SO dull.
Haiku #60666, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 6:48 am ET

You're wrong, vhs.
Since when did anything work?
Entropy is Lord.
Haiku #60665, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 2, 2018 5:34 am ET

Haiku go kaka
Haiku #60664, by Anonymous Poet
November 2, 2018 4:54 am ET

I
Haiku #60663, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:17 pm ET

I
Haiku #60662, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:16 pm ET

I
Haiku #60661, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 11:09 pm ET

I
Haiku #60660, by Back talker of Out Back
November 1, 2018 11:08 pm ET

I
Haiku #60659, by Back talker of Out Back
November 1, 2018 11:07 pm ET

No toilet paper?
No problem. Just use Bad Haiku
5-7-5 ply
Haiku #60658, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:32 pm ET

My Haiku is hexed
Haiku #60657, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:30 pm ET

Even my ass crack
It
Haiku #60656, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 10:29 pm ET

i feel doomed, nothing
works, want to delete myself
everything is broken

including haiku
Haiku #60655, by vhs
November 1, 2018 8:56 pm ET

Bending over now
Pendulous thang hanging low
Pick up my car keys
Haiku #60654, by Varoom of Zoom Zoom
November 1, 2018 5:11 pm ET

Your verse inhabits
your own rectal cavity
its true place of birth
Haiku #60653, by Anonymous Poet
November 1, 2018 3:41 pm ET

Actor Richard Gere
Is offering a reward
His gerbil went missing
Haiku #60652, by Kidnapping this famous gerbil you might make me rich of Gerbil hunting
November 1, 2018 2:21 pm ET

My enormous cock
is too large for your tight ass.
Oh wait, there it goes.

Take that, you gerbil!
I rescued you from my ass
so I can bang yours.
Haiku #60651, by DARTH FERBILGUCKER
November 1, 2018 5:57 am ET

Move to USA
President is a Cheeto
The place has gone nuts
Haiku #60650, by Relocation Advisor of Americhaos
November 1, 2018 5:09 am ET

Guess who's on eBay?
Selling stale moon cake doorstops
For the holidays
Haiku #60649, by Sleuth
November 1, 2018 5:07 am ET

Considering move.
The slums of Mogadishu?
Perhaps Australia?
Haiku #60648, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:29 am ET

Chicken Avenger.
Superhero, pecks out eyes
of chicken fuckers.
Haiku #60647, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:26 am ET

A fugitive, no.
Where I am, there are no laws.
I guess it's more fun.

As for VHS,
I'm sure that he's Cuntfart Cunt.
If not, don't tell me.
Haiku #60646, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 1, 2018 2:22 am ET

Incarcerated
VHS' situation
Darth: A fugitive
Haiku #60645, by Hmmm
October 31, 2018 11:22 pm ET

Sometimes I wonder
Who you two gents really are
Got fuzzy viewer
Haiku #60644, by Me
October 31, 2018 11:20 pm ET

I thought it was wax lips and malted milk balls in that bucket
Haiku #60643, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 8:24 pm ET

Eagle Scout now, sir
I won the Scavenger Hunt
Aced Chicken fucking
Haiku #60642, by Thanks to your YouTube tutorial of Scouts Honor. And on her
October 31, 2018 8:23 pm ET

Step into my van,
gullible helpful boy scout.
You will make great soup.
Haiku #60641, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 31, 2018 8:06 pm ET

The parents were pissed.
My candy bowl had a hole.
Through it I poked, well...

You know.
Haiku #60640, by DARTH FIGPUCKER of I did not drop those shat in undies. I put them there purposely.
October 31, 2018 8:02 pm ET

Mr. Figoucker
You dropped these white underwear
With the big brown stain
Haiku #60639, by Boy Scout of Crosswalk
October 31, 2018 6:12 pm ET

Foreskin and foreskin
And foreskin and foreskin and
Foreskin is Twentyskin
Haiku #60638, by Please check my work, Prof. Figpucker of One room schoolhouse
October 31, 2018 6:08 pm ET

John Boy Walton
Haiku #60637, by Press Agent of Pimple on Mr. Thomas
October 31, 2018 6:05 pm ET

Yo. Hear Ye Hear Ye
Please disregard my birthmark
Named Richard Thomas
Haiku #60636, by John Boy Walton
October 31, 2018 6:03 pm ET

I cannot decide
how many children I'll eat
this fine Halloween.

Teeee Heeee heeee bwah ha
hooo hee hoo mwahhhhhh ha ha ho
heee *snort* *cackle* *fart*.
Haiku #60635, by Cuntfart Cunt's twin sister.
October 31, 2018 5:51 pm ET

Glitch in the Matrix
Haiku #60634, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 1:56 pm ET

John Boy Walton
Haiku #60633, by Show some respect
October 31, 2018 1:55 pm ET

Passing out Werther
Haiku #60632, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 12:03 pm ET

Passing out Werther
Haiku #60631, by Anonymous Poet
October 31, 2018 12:02 pm ET

Tandem horse costume
Ex husband was the back end
So appropriate
Haiku #60630, by Oat muncher
October 31, 2018 11:52 am ET