Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 19 Days and 74079 Haikus later...

Proof we are not same person
Haiku # 60603, October 30, 2018 12:09 pm ET
by Starkitten
Fartherer...floored it!
Speed Trap. Sirens. car chase..Cops
Here's your shit tickets
Haiku # 60602, October 30, 2018 12:05 pm ET
by C. U. N. Court. Skiitten of Cuntfart Cuntfart and cunt attorneys at law
Sodom and Gomorrah.
Sodomy and gonorrhea.
Saddam's gone, or is he?
Haiku # 60601, October 30, 2018 12:04 pm ET
Farther = farting father = gaseous priest = methane monk = Friar Flatus = flatulent patriarch.
Fartherer = one who goes the extra mile to let his kids know that he is the master of farts in THIS house!
Haiku # 60600, October 30, 2018 9:44 am ET
by df of course -- who else?!
Having sex with stellar objects.
One extra syllable.

In all three lines.
So this has one less than.
It balances.

It's fuck a black hole.
And I bet that you would too.
Don't be a racist.
Haiku # 60599, October 30, 2018 9:38 am ET
by Farther = Farting Father
It's celestially
Celestially celestial.
Not bestial. Just best...
Haiku # 60598, October 30, 2018 7:08 am ET
by lon Ba by lon Ba by lon Ba of Sodom and Gomorrah LLC
Quivering asshole
In moonlight, Tranquility
Ex-Lax kicks in
Haiku # 60597, October 30, 2018 4:45 am ET
by Mark Skidds of Skidmore
Quivering asshole
In moonlight, Tranquility
Ex-Lax kicks in
Haiku # 60596, October 30, 2018 4:45 am ET
by Mark Skidds of Skidmore
That Gerard Streator
Makes me think of Clint Eastwood
In Dirty Chairy
Haiku # 60595, October 30, 2018 12:58 am ET
by Director of Director's Chair
We're like the show friends
But we don't live together,
Don't have a monkey.
Haiku # 60594, October 30, 2018 12:55 am ET
by Someone like Someone on Friends of There for you
The Original
Burger King Chicken sandwich
I have mine with cheese
Haiku # 60593, October 30, 2018 12:44 am ET
by Mack of Behind the wheel
See Gerard Streator
Caught having sex with a couch
Found fifty bucks change
Haiku # 60592, October 29, 2018 11:32 pm ET
by Starkitten of Sofa King
Popcorn! Peanuts!
Longpig and Shortpig! Poop Chutes!
Underwear to sniff!
Haiku # 60591, October 29, 2018 11:24 pm ET
by Sniffy
Under the big top
Six hirsute horny midgets
Circus Circle Jerk
Haiku # 60590, October 29, 2018 11:19 pm ET
by Sucker born every minute
Beginner Trapeze
Sweat, chills,gnarled fingers..let...go..
Shat filled leotard
Haiku # 60589, October 29, 2018 11:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Look up
Pet Penis Walker
Obedience training,too
An end to pulling
Haiku # 60588, October 29, 2018 10:54 pm ET
by Penis Walkers of Pacific Northwest
Settle down now boys
The real Starkitten loves you
Wild and crazy guys
Haiku # 60587, October 29, 2018 10:33 pm ET
by The real Starkitten
Who let in the Swedes?
Fucking meatball head mofos.
Bjork ork muppets!
Haiku # 60586, October 29, 2018 10:19 pm ET
by Darth Very Hairy Stinky Kitten of by "kitten" I mean pussy, by pussy I mean cuntfart cunt
Weird site vor jiskk
Cevlak se jrokka lak bes.
Nur poop grivva vesc
Haiku # 60585, October 29, 2018 8:39 pm ET
by Cegdal
Hai Hai Hai Hai Hai
Hai hai hai hai hai hai hai
Hai hai hai hai KU!!
Haiku # 60584, October 29, 2018 8:15 pm ET
by (God) bless you of Everywhere
Whispering warm breeze
Circling bumblebees knees
Jumped by Ma Nature
Haiku # 60583, October 29, 2018 8:11 pm ET
by It's my nature of Granola Barstool..they make ya poop
That hospital food
May I suggest the long pig?
One with a hard on
Haiku # 60582, October 29, 2018 7:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth is not kitten
Haiku # 60581, October 29, 2018 7:50 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
On the other hand (the hairy one we beat off with) my ooops chute shall never be silenced! Oops shouldn't have had Smartfood. At first the farts wouldn't make an exit. After a few days we hit pay dirt.
Haiku # 60580, October 29, 2018 7:47 pm ET
by #2
Mute Porcine poop chutes
Becept for the crunch of munch
Pig Ass Anus Meat
Haiku # 60579, October 29, 2018 7:44 pm ET
by Watcher of Pigfuckers
You gents are funny
Mooning you both. Toot Pa Toot!
cuntfart cuntfart cunt
Haiku # 60578, October 29, 2018 7:40 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
When you eat cracklins
Your undies get a spacklin
Is it like bacon?
Haiku # 60577, October 29, 2018 7:38 pm ET
by Need2know
They're the same poet.
VHS, Darth Figpucker,
and Starkitten's balls.
Haiku # 60576, October 29, 2018 7:37 pm ET
by It's a fact!
Dear Darth Figpucker
When I stand by dishwasher
Haiku # 60575, October 29, 2018 7:35 pm ET
by Starkitten of Dishwasher. Had a random thought about monkeys being raped. Thought of Peter Gabriel and then came directly to iPad to read your
A fig pucker is
a dimple on a ripe fig.
Right size for my dick.

Worms do not enter
by way of the urethra.
But haiku sure can.

The tricky nose is
in my head via tainted
pork taint consumption.

Shit hole country food.
Shitlin chitlin pork anus.
Safer to fuck pigs.

Cracklin crunchy treats.
Sphincter stinked her movie snacks.
Deep fried fecal chutes.

Pork skin and "innards".
Saturated palm oil.
MSG, of course.

Heart doctors love it.
Keeps them in the green, you know.
And on the golf green.
Haiku # 60574, October 29, 2018 7:33 pm ET
Humans write haiku.
Chimps have been known to rape frogs.
The chimps are smarter.
Haiku # 60573, October 29, 2018 7:09 pm ET
Them frogs been croaking
Patient in Isolation
Beat off. sleeping now
Haiku # 60572, October 29, 2018 4:26 pm ET
by Haiku General Hospital of Wait til he eats his words at mealtime
Increase the dosage
Page Bertha from Obstetrics
Sit her on his face
Haiku # 60571, October 29, 2018 3:47 pm ET
Hi Mom, just got home
from the Haiku Wars. I made
purse from Darth's nut-sack.
Haiku # 60570, October 29, 2018 3:29 pm ET
by when you Puck Figs you can get bad case of Tricky-Gnosis
Dr. Starkitten
Wonderful bedside manner
Insert Catheter
Haiku # 60569, October 29, 2018 3:22 pm ET
by Owwwwwwwwwwewwwweeeeeeeeeeeeee
Resting comfortably
No details other than this:
His dink's in traction
Haiku # 60568, October 29, 2018 3:19 pm ET
by Haiku General of Corner of Piss and Moan
He's seeing double
Thinks Figpucker's Starkitten
Please.. can you help hm?
Haiku # 60567, October 29, 2018 3:12 pm ET
by To be continued
Right ths way, doctor
He's slumped over his haiku
Went bat shit crazy
Haiku # 60566, October 29, 2018 3:10 pm ET
by Unseen Marcus Welby of The Madness of Haiku
Satori ! It's true.
Pigfucker is Starkitten.
Haiku # 60565, October 29, 2018 2:35 pm ET
by VHS less insane than most of them in here (haiku asylum)
I think someone's been watching too much CNN. (Counterfeit New Network) and FOX (Fake Orgasm Xenophobes). You liberal right wing nazi hippies acid smoking boy rapers all the same.
Haiku # 60564, October 29, 2018 2:24 pm ET
Impregnate Donald's hair.
Cheetos overrun the earth.
Fistfuck the polar bears.

Reach deep inside.
Pull out a seal carcass.
It's still warm, so fuck it.

Dayglow fluorescent orange semen.
A beacon of hope for kid fuckers.
A warning to hippie junkie crackheads
and dark skinned Losers.
Haiku # 60563, October 29, 2018 2:14 pm ET
by Pres. Donald Trump, pussy grabber extraordanaire.
You pathetic bitch
Your funt is so clogged with filth
You need a Funt-Shunt
Haiku # 60562, October 29, 2018 2:11 pm ET
by Your cardiologist is a gynecologist of mediocre haiku!
Your body fluids
Leave a tell-tale crusty stain
On Donald's necktie
Haiku # 60561, October 29, 2018 2:07 pm ET
by prejaculate of post-immaculate
politico kid fister
raping his nephew's tight ass
'cause wife won't do anal

and his son fight's back.

Right wing Deliverance Nazi drinks his newphew's tears, wrung out from the pillow case.

How's the wall going? Mexico got out the check book yet?
Haiku # 60560, October 29, 2018 2:05 pm ET
by Bernie Sander's pet bobbit worm.
Bow down and worship
Kneel before your Lord Cheeto.
Plead orange mercy.
Haiku # 60559, October 29, 2018 2:01 pm ET
by burning holy mountain of cheeto purifying flames
When poets jerk off
And release prejaculate
That is your haiku
Haiku # 60558, October 29, 2018 1:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Putin? Is princess.
TRUMP: Czar of all the Russias.
You will please shut up.
Haiku # 60557, October 29, 2018 1:55 pm ET
by Ivan the Terrible of terrible Haiku
Funtcart funtcart funt
Used that line too many times
Put FUNT back in CART !
Haiku # 60556, October 29, 2018 1:51 pm ET
by Funt Cart support unit #57D of Old Albanian widow's exposed funt
Putin is the king
Trump is his fat prison bitch
....That is the real news
Haiku # 60555, October 29, 2018 1:49 pm ET
by Concerned American
Quit yer goose stepping
Clean your liverwurst cum stains
Perhaps a shower?
Haiku # 60554, October 29, 2018 1:46 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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