Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 39 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

Go on, slap me, bitch.
That was ME with Heidi Klum.
Not Judge Kavanaugh.
Haiku # 59763, September 28, 2018 10:27 am ET
by Supermodels are in awe of my male prowess, for I am their judge
Some one take me quick
to Haiku Anonymous.
I'm on a bender...
Haiku # 59762, September 28, 2018 10:16 am ET
by vomiting verse in the halls of the Poetry Clinic
Were I the Doctor
I sure would have examined
The lovely Leela
Haiku # 59761, September 28, 2018 10:13 am ET
by signing my waiver, you are absolved of all rights to question my expertise
The Tardis: it was
complex Tantric metaphor
Leela as consort (?)
Haiku # 59760, September 28, 2018 10:08 am ET
by , next to, above, around, inside, along, all prepositions of place
Now I tell my kids
"Dr. Who was a great show
with old-school effects."
Haiku # 59759, September 28, 2018 10:02 am ET
by Who What Where When of How
i dunno, the fem
doc, so many guys going
eww...but i will watch

her...oh...brilliant!
Haiku # 59758, September 28, 2018 9:03 am ET
by vhs
my you have a long
scarf...would you like a jelly
baby? boy would i
Haiku # 59757, September 28, 2018 8:26 am ET
by vhs of it is bigger on the inside
They say Tom was gay,
though he had the best women.
years later: who knew?
Haiku # 59756, September 28, 2018 8:08 am ET
by the good doctor's side, beware of Leela's savage beauty
Tomb of Rasselam:
recalling fragments of that
weird Who episode
Haiku # 59755, September 28, 2018 8:04 am ET
by of by of by by of by of BUY NOW
That freaking Leela
always got me excited.
She was the Doctor's
Haiku # 59754, September 28, 2018 8:01 am ET
by the melody of the theme, we knew it was Who
you you you are are
an oppresssss.....orrrrr musst ...deee...stroooyyy
maaaleeee wwwhhhittteee...cis gen...dooor...

EXTERMINATE
Haiku # 59753, September 28, 2018 3:49 am ET
by lesbian daleks of the world of as presented by vhs
these people were
programmed programmed malfunction
must must must.....re.........sist....
Haiku # 59752, September 28, 2018 3:47 am ET
by vhs
interner molochs
devour our children as
sacrifice, burning
Haiku # 59751, September 28, 2018 3:45 am ET
by vhs
defiant leftist
destroys her oponent, then
turns her hate within
Haiku # 59750, September 28, 2018 3:44 am ET
by vhs
malfunction at night
low does of blue light grounded
rest is all we need
Haiku # 59749, September 28, 2018 3:43 am ET
by vhs
the world still spins till
the last day when it all ends
we are as dust mites
Haiku # 59748, September 28, 2018 3:42 am ET
by vhs
Actually, my friend
I just checked my underpants
We had relations
Haiku # 59747, September 28, 2018 1:39 am ET
by Surprised of But not as surprised as you
My haiku brushes
Against yours - now your haikus
Smell like my haikus
Haiku # 59746, September 28, 2018 12:21 am ET
by Lion Some Day
I've checked the records
One similar incident
Involved Heidi Klum
Haiku # 59745, September 27, 2018 11:21 pm ET
by Bitchslap Watch of 1-800-BITCHSLAP
Some guy in New Zealand
Bitchslapped with an octopus
By a freaking seal
Haiku # 59744, September 27, 2018 11:18 pm ET
by Bitchslap Watch of 1-800-BITCHSLAP
How about this group?
The Beatles and their spouses
What would you call it?
Haiku # 59743, September 27, 2018 10:54 pm ET
by Octopus' Garden?
Agnetha Faltskog:
your voice combats this bad world.
ABBA unto death!
Haiku # 59742, September 27, 2018 10:05 pm ET
by Annifrid, Bjorn, Benny and Agnetha of the 1970's
They must be dwarves then
I counted seven hards on
They were garden gnomes
Haiku # 59741, September 27, 2018 9:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you mean the guy from
game of thrones there the cool
midget guy right there???

no midgets are cool
Haiku # 59740, September 27, 2018 9:13 pm ET
by vhs
We have all been raped
By TV and internet
And horny midgets
Haiku # 59739, September 27, 2018 9:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'm fucking tired
of these victim people on
tv coming out and

saying he raped me
then getting their accused killed
and getting tv contracts
Haiku # 59738, September 27, 2018 8:51 pm ET
by vhs
i may be someone
who gos through trials now but will
see what happens next
Haiku # 59737, September 27, 2018 8:25 pm ET
by vhs
such are the many
voices of legion speaking
till they are cast out
Haiku # 59736, September 27, 2018 8:23 pm ET
by vhs
Balut or the egg
Which came first? Colonel Sanders.
He choked his chicken.
Haiku # 59735, September 27, 2018 8:08 pm ET
by Nerd Manager of KFC
I'll be there for you
It's me, Marcel, the monkey
Flinging poo at you
Haiku # 59734, September 27, 2018 7:28 pm ET
by Marcel the Monkey
Pull me on stage, hon
It's my Bruce Springsteen spot cue
Your friend, Courtney Cox
Haiku # 59733, September 27, 2018 7:20 pm ET
by Courtney Cox of front row
God this site is weird...
it's like pissing in the dark--
but pissing Haiku
Haiku # 59732, September 27, 2018 6:22 pm ET
by what you have written I am convinced of nothing.
i feel like hank hill...
uh...huh huh...uh yeah um nice
weather today...huh....
Haiku # 59731, September 27, 2018 5:14 pm ET
by vhs
Your cream is curdled
Out the arse a head turtled
Orange Laughingstock
Haiku # 59730, September 27, 2018 3:33 pm ET
by Covfefe in Chief of U better turn over a new leaf
I ain't got no box
Just politicized Haiku
to think outside of
Haiku # 59729, September 27, 2018 3:03 pm ET
by just showing up, there's a chance of hope and change
Uh, Hillary who?
Turn off the idiot box,
go appoint yourself!
Haiku # 59728, September 27, 2018 1:54 pm ET
by QueenBee of the hive.
Kyoto Temple-gate
Leaves float on carp-pool surface...

APPOINT KAVANAUGH!
Haiku # 59727, September 27, 2018 1:06 pm ET
by obstructing selection of judges, they show their fall colors
Autumn's first fresh sigh;
maple tree tinged with sadness.

LOCK HILLARY UP !
Haiku # 59726, September 27, 2018 12:29 pm ET
by Deplorable Me, of course
I've been to Lowell
But never read "On the Road"
Although I've lived it...
Haiku # 59725, September 27, 2018 10:50 am ET
by Beatnik nihilism leads to worlds of pain (great Cream song BTW)
soon it will be meet
the new cool, same as the old
cool, go moan for Man
Haiku # 59724, September 27, 2018 8:50 am ET
by vhs of kerouac abides
the show goes on and
the circus maximus distract
public at the large

yes i have heard of these rumored
trials
Haiku # 59723, September 27, 2018 8:48 am ET
by vhs of q uestion authority
Haiku bomb, well placed
explode syllabic impact
bring the shithouse down
Haiku # 59722, September 27, 2018 8:26 am ET
by exploding, poetic forms of innovation are rendered powerless
Does U.S. deserve
to even be saved at all?
Decadent half-wits
Haiku # 59721, September 27, 2018 8:22 am ET
by by by by sick of of of of of of stuttering
Frankfurt school of Marx
and Fabian Socialists
writhing, burn in hell
Haiku # 59720, September 27, 2018 8:19 am ET
by got real excited after that YouTube and kind of of became monomaniacal
Some travel advice:
Obama and Hillary,
Purchase tickets NOW
Haiku # 59719, September 27, 2018 8:14 am ET
by one-way travel to rule of Justice
The retribution
will be at every level,
even poetic
Haiku # 59718, September 27, 2018 8:10 am ET
by Law selectively applied, the Republic is in danger of implosion
Hey, Saul Alinsky:
We're coming for your red ass...
Better hide in Hell.
Haiku # 59717, September 27, 2018 8:02 am ET
by Chicago school of community agitation
Get ready to win:
political poetry
in true Haiku form
Haiku # 59716, September 27, 2018 7:59 am ET
by winning and winning, we do not tire of winning
Haiku tribunals
read the charges against them syllabic traitors
Haiku # 59715, September 27, 2018 7:56 am ET
by subverting our constitution, they are assured of consequences to follow
Martial Law will be
the true poetic justice,
Alinskyite scum.
Haiku # 59714, September 27, 2018 7:48 am ET
by and by, tribunals of military law will appear
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