Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 57 Days and 78011 Haiku later...
There once was a Jane
in whose pocket I'd love to
blast off my rocket
Haiku # 1296 February 17, 1999 10:26 am ET
by squish
There once was a Jane
from Princeton who'd sit on my
face and smoke Winstons
Haiku # 1295 February 17, 1999 10:02 am ET
by squish
There once was a Jane
from Nantucket who's clit was
so fine I'd suck it
Haiku # 1294 February 17, 1999 9:58 am ET
by squish
There once was a guy
Who instead of limericks
Wrote me love haikus
Haiku # 1293 February 17, 1999 12:59 am ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
hygiene and pizza
the anguish of bad acne
they bring the deep dish
Haiku # 1292 February 16, 1999 5:00 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
my aching lungs wheeze
no money for the gas bill
need fresh bongwater
Haiku # 1291 February 16, 1999 4:57 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
if we had women
we could have some hot tub sex
if we had hot tub
Haiku # 1290 February 15, 1999 11:55 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
thank you very much
a queen size bed means more room
for sex with myself
Haiku # 1289 February 15, 1999 11:53 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
OK, I dont mind
Its my pleasure to do them
I love the dishes
Haiku # 1288 February 15, 1999 3:51 am ET
by TimDunedin, NZ
Sometimes I wonder:
How much ejaculated,
Any night on Earth?
Haiku # 1287 February 15, 1999 3:45 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Toasted cheese sandwich
A Noblemans invention
Ow Fuck! burnt my lip.
Haiku # 1286 February 15, 1999 3:44 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Why should I do them?
If I got home earlier
I would cook, you clean.
Haiku # 1285 February 15, 1999 3:42 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Always the dishes
Eating and making a mess
And always my turn
Haiku # 1284 February 15, 1999 3:41 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
The girl is happy
She hugs every puppy
And laughs at their bites
Haiku # 1283 February 14, 1999 7:22 am ET
by elmyra duff of peoria, Guess
I'm sorry you're sad
But you're not allowed to live
Vicariously
Haiku # 1282 February 13, 1999 11:56 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
we laughed at the thought
her teeth grinding in her sleep
in a bathroom cup
Haiku # 1281 February 13, 1999 6:48 am ET
by ashley
weird looking small fish
blue betassled doral fin
so who's the freak now?
Haiku # 1280 February 13, 1999 6:35 am ET
by ashley of Oz
if we had some ham
we could have some ham and eggs
if we had some eggs
Haiku # 1279 February 13, 1999 2:01 am ET
by oldnasty usa
here is an oldy

but fine piece of bad haiku

the man is knocking



if we had some ham
we could have some ham and eggs

if we had some eggs
oldnasty
Haiku # 1278 February 13, 1999 2:01 am ET
by Stanilicious Bubbalicious of usa
livin is easy
when you stroll through large cactus
and don't wear no drawers
Haiku # 1277 February 12, 1999 11:36 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1276 February 11, 1999 7:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1275 February 11, 1999 7:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1274 February 11, 1999 7:15 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
took a massive shit
contemplated size and girth
stood in disbelief
Haiku # 1273 February 11, 1999 2:17 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
drawing nude people
is harder than you might think
the same goes for me
Haiku # 1272 February 11, 1999 2:10 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
March comes in like a
lion and goes ot like a
skank in a cat fight.
Haiku # 1271 February 11, 1999 1:05 pm ET
by Intern
I wouldn't fuck her
with a dog's dick and someone
else's pelvic thrusts.
Haiku # 1270 February 11, 1999 12:41 pm ET
by Intern
trained my grandma's dog
to piss on the kitchen floor
when someone sneezes
Haiku # 1269 February 11, 1999 10:44 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
no haiku G-Man?
the poison is in your brain
and u will submit
Haiku # 1268 February 11, 1999 7:57 am ET
by ash
hey jane, with that brain
don't repeat your sad refrain
ivy ! ivy ! way !
Haiku # 1267 February 11, 1999 6:24 am ET
by ash
I don't like Haikusand you can't make me write emever
Haiku # 1266 February 11, 1999 12:55 am ET
by G Man of Albuquerque, USA
I have never claimed
To be a fan of this state
Polluted Jersey
Haiku # 1265 February 10, 1999 8:41 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
i also smell bad
but my mother always said
i am a great catch
Haiku # 1264 February 10, 1999 8:36 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Ivy wannabe
In the asshole of the world
Princeton, New Jersey
Haiku # 1263 February 10, 1999 8:30 pm ET
by AHHT
i must feel threatened
cause i have a small penis
and i can't count
Haiku # 1262 February 10, 1999 8:27 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
Haiku # 1261 February 10, 1999 6:40 pm ET
by hyper person of shit town, usa
my new country song
'Don't Wipe Your Ass With My Heart'
is gonna be huge
Haiku # 1260 February 10, 1999 4:21 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
if I was Tom Hanks
I'd take a crap in a box
and mail it to Meg
Haiku # 1259 February 10, 1999 4:18 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
ran over something
too dark to see, felt the thump
boy do my nuts itch
Haiku # 1258 February 10, 1999 4:17 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
If I am so sweet,
How can you feel so threatened?
Come on; be honest.
Haiku # 1257 February 10, 1999 3:20 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
once I smoked a joint
in a bush at MIT
still I am humble
Haiku # 1256 February 10, 1999 1:45 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
they say happiness
is a thing that can't be touched
good-bye porno mags
Haiku # 1255 February 10, 1999 1:06 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
knowledge is power
but power tends to corrupt
be careful sweet Jane
Haiku # 1254 February 10, 1999 12:52 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Princeton ballsuckers:
Nobody gives a fuck where
you go to college.
Haiku # 1253 February 10, 1999 10:04 am ET
by Shut Up
a blue tongue lizard
fresh tomatoes on the vine
sweet frangipani
Haiku # 1252 February 10, 1999 6:44 am ET
by ashley of Oz
knowledge is fleeting
institutions rise and fall
princeton isn't god
Haiku # 1251 February 10, 1999 6:37 am ET
by ash of Oz
When we told those jokes,
No one knew your wife's Polish.
A thousand pardons.
Haiku # 1250 February 10, 1999 12:28 am ET
by Greg Agalsoff of Northridge, USA
Princeton is knowledge
Just because you lack the same
Do not be jealous
Haiku # 1249 February 10, 1999 12:24 am ET
by Jane of Princeton, USA
Princeton must be proud
of such talented students
sharp like bowling balls
Haiku # 1248 February 10, 1999 12:14 am ET
by Thunder Stork
If an infiniteNumber of apes were online,They'd use AOL.
Haiku # 1247 February 9, 1999 3:25 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of Fort Collins, US