Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 45 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

There once was a Jane
from Nantucket who's clit was
so fine I'd suck it
Haiku # 1294, February 17, 1999 9:58 am ET
by squish
There once was a guy
Who instead of limericks
Wrote me love haikus
Haiku # 1293, February 17, 1999 12:59 am ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
hygiene and pizza
the anguish of bad acne
they bring the deep dish
Haiku # 1292, February 16, 1999 5:00 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
my aching lungs wheeze
no money for the gas bill
need fresh bongwater
Haiku # 1291, February 16, 1999 4:57 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
if we had women
we could have some hot tub sex
if we had hot tub
Haiku # 1290, February 15, 1999 11:55 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
thank you very much
a queen size bed means more room
for sex with myself
Haiku # 1289, February 15, 1999 11:53 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
OK, I dont mind
Its my pleasure to do them
I love the dishes
Haiku # 1288, February 15, 1999 3:51 am ET
by TimDunedin, NZ
Sometimes I wonder:
How much ejaculated,
Any night on Earth?
Haiku # 1287, February 15, 1999 3:45 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Toasted cheese sandwich
A Noblemans invention
Ow Fuck! burnt my lip.
Haiku # 1286, February 15, 1999 3:44 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Why should I do them?
If I got home earlier
I would cook, you clean.
Haiku # 1285, February 15, 1999 3:42 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Always the dishes
Eating and making a mess
And always my turn
Haiku # 1284, February 15, 1999 3:41 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
The girl is happy
She hugs every puppy
And laughs at their bites
Haiku # 1283, February 14, 1999 7:22 am ET
by elmyra duff of peoria, Guess
I'm sorry you're sad
But you're not allowed to live
Vicariously
Haiku # 1282, February 13, 1999 11:56 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
we laughed at the thought
her teeth grinding in her sleep
in a bathroom cup
Haiku # 1281, February 13, 1999 6:48 am ET
by ashley
weird looking small fish
blue betassled doral fin
so who's the freak now?
Haiku # 1280, February 13, 1999 6:35 am ET
by ashley of Oz
if we had some ham
we could have some ham and eggs
if we had some eggs
Haiku # 1279, February 13, 1999 2:01 am ET
by oldnasty usa
here is an oldy

but fine piece of bad haiku

the man is knocking



if we had some ham
we could have some ham and eggs

if we had some eggs
oldnasty
Haiku # 1278, February 13, 1999 2:01 am ET
by Stanilicious Bubbalicious of usa
livin is easy
when you stroll through large cactus
and don't wear no drawers
Haiku # 1277, February 12, 1999 11:36 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1276, February 11, 1999 7:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1275, February 11, 1999 7:16 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
Hello I am Gay
Anal Rape isnt for boys
Leave me alone please.
Haiku # 1274, February 11, 1999 7:15 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of no
took a massive shit
contemplated size and girth
stood in disbelief
Haiku # 1273, February 11, 1999 2:17 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
drawing nude people
is harder than you might think
the same goes for me
Haiku # 1272, February 11, 1999 2:10 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
March comes in like a
lion and goes ot like a
skank in a cat fight.
Haiku # 1271, February 11, 1999 1:05 pm ET
by Intern
I wouldn't fuck her
with a dog's dick and someone
else's pelvic thrusts.
Haiku # 1270, February 11, 1999 12:41 pm ET
by Intern
trained my grandma's dog
to piss on the kitchen floor
when someone sneezes
Haiku # 1269, February 11, 1999 10:44 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
no haiku G-Man?
the poison is in your brain
and u will submit
Haiku # 1268, February 11, 1999 7:57 am ET
by ash
hey jane, with that brain
don't repeat your sad refrain
ivy ! ivy ! way !
Haiku # 1267, February 11, 1999 6:24 am ET
by ash
I don't like Haikusand you can't make me write emever
Haiku # 1266, February 11, 1999 12:55 am ET
by G Man of Albuquerque, USA
I have never claimed
To be a fan of this state
Polluted Jersey
Haiku # 1265, February 10, 1999 8:41 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
i also smell bad
but my mother always said
i am a great catch
Haiku # 1264, February 10, 1999 8:36 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Ivy wannabe
In the asshole of the world
Princeton, New Jersey
Haiku # 1263, February 10, 1999 8:30 pm ET
by AHHT
i must feel threatened
cause i have a small penis
and i can't count
Haiku # 1262, February 10, 1999 8:27 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
Haiku # 1261, February 10, 1999 6:40 pm ET
by hyper person of shit town, usa
my new country song
'Don't Wipe Your Ass With My Heart'
is gonna be huge
Haiku # 1260, February 10, 1999 4:21 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
if I was Tom Hanks
I'd take a crap in a box
and mail it to Meg
Haiku # 1259, February 10, 1999 4:18 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
ran over something
too dark to see, felt the thump
boy do my nuts itch
Haiku # 1258, February 10, 1999 4:17 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
If I am so sweet,
How can you feel so threatened?
Come on; be honest.
Haiku # 1257, February 10, 1999 3:20 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
once I smoked a joint
in a bush at MIT
still I am humble
Haiku # 1256, February 10, 1999 1:45 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
they say happiness
is a thing that can't be touched
good-bye porno mags
Haiku # 1255, February 10, 1999 1:06 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
knowledge is power
but power tends to corrupt
be careful sweet Jane
Haiku # 1254, February 10, 1999 12:52 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Princeton ballsuckers:
Nobody gives a fuck where
you go to college.
Haiku # 1253, February 10, 1999 10:04 am ET
by Shut Up
a blue tongue lizard
fresh tomatoes on the vine
sweet frangipani
Haiku # 1252, February 10, 1999 6:44 am ET
by ashley of Oz
knowledge is fleeting
institutions rise and fall
princeton isn't god
Haiku # 1251, February 10, 1999 6:37 am ET
by ash of Oz
When we told those jokes,
No one knew your wife's Polish.
A thousand pardons.
Haiku # 1250, February 10, 1999 12:28 am ET
by Greg Agalsoff of Northridge, USA
Princeton is knowledge
Just because you lack the same
Do not be jealous
Haiku # 1249, February 10, 1999 12:24 am ET
by Jane of Princeton, USA
Princeton must be proud
of such talented students
sharp like bowling balls
Haiku # 1248, February 10, 1999 12:14 am ET
by Thunder Stork
If an infiniteNumber of apes were online,They'd use AOL.
Haiku # 1247, February 9, 1999 3:25 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of Fort Collins, US
Enough! Or I'll shove
Bottles up your asses and
Kick them 'til they break!
Haiku # 1246, February 9, 1999 3:17 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of Fort Collins, US
you assholes bore me
classist, artless, obvious
as dumb as Ayn Rand
Haiku # 1245, February 9, 1999 12:29 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire