Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 223 Days and 77150 Haiku later...

Free crackpipe sandwich!
Poupon your roast beast! Slathered!
Fifty shards of Darth!
Haiku # 75086, March 6, 2022 7:03 pm ET
by Calling my Lawyer of Immediately
That's packing a lunch!
Fifty shades of Grey Poupon.
Slathered on Roast Beast.
Haiku # 75085, March 6, 2022 5:55 pm ET
by Luncheon of Holiday Inn , Encino, California
I prefer sandwich
Stuffed full of tasty goodness
Like your mom's buttocks
Haiku # 75084, March 6, 2022 5:45 pm ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
The free crack pipe lie?
Shut up and kiss Mike Lindell
And drop your pants
Haiku # 75082, March 6, 2022 9:59 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yes, Agrohimnee.
I will bring device to Kiev.
You have timer codes?
Haiku # 75081, March 5, 2022 8:25 am ET
by Marilyn Ninna of Humanitarian Non-profit Troll Farm
Stop your squawking, friend.
It's time for Birdie num nums.
It's time to party
Haiku # 75078, March 4, 2022 9:08 pm ET
by Noticer of num nums
Biden: free crack pipes.
Russia: invade the Ukraine.
C.I.A: "We win!"
Haiku # 75077, March 4, 2022 12:03 pm ET
by Chants of "Let's Go BRANDON !"
Put in your two cents
You will receive one haiku
and two freeze dried farts
Haiku # 75075, March 3, 2022 11:42 pm ET
by Deal of The Day
Put in then put out.
Put up or shut up. Haiku:
What we want from you.
Haiku # 75073, March 3, 2022 8:25 pm ET
by Volodimir of Vladimir
if you're feeling red
and you want your neighbours dead
putin on the blitz
Haiku # 75072, March 3, 2022 6:20 am ET
by ash of get back in the ussr
The moon is old cheese
From the moon, the cheese tides swell
Blame Darth for the smell
Haiku # 75069, March 2, 2022 2:30 am ET
by Songs of The Fig Pluckers
Faint tinkling of tune...
You will piss like a monsoon
The ladies will swoon
Haiku # 75068, March 2, 2022 12:30 am ET
by Noticer of Biology
You in the cocoon
Dangling all aglow with moon
When do you bust out?
Haiku # 75067, March 1, 2022 10:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
I crane, you crane, we
all crane for Ukraine. Put in
a bit more effort.
Haiku # 75066, March 1, 2022 7:10 am ET
by Kenneth Affok of Россия
The Beak of the Week
Do any birds have big dinks?
Flightless ones, perhaps
Haiku # 75065, March 1, 2022 1:21 am ET
by 65th 75th ex of Manmoth, New Jersey
The world will be gone
before the chrysalis pops.
Better to be dead.
Haiku # 75064, February 28, 2022 2:07 am ET
by SLOTHMAN
I awoke once more
With that music heart feeling
Mind orchestra plays
Back Where I Belong
By Baroness (post chorus)
As I think of her
Spacetime's been weaving
An emotion tapestry
And I realize
Stunned hyperventilating:
This is my cocoon
Grown over new wings
That now grow, fill with my blood
Soon... I seek the moon
Haiku # 75063, February 28, 2022 12:00 am ET
by MANMOTH of Hanging upside down from a little branch, throbbing slightly but hopefully not enough to attract predators
Uncomfortably numb
He said that it was put in
I didn't feel it
Haiku # 75060, February 26, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by Melania Trump of USA
I am too boring
To putin any effort.
So I invade you.
Haiku # 75059, February 26, 2022 2:30 pm ET
by Noticer of Vladimir's Mother
Enlighten yourself
Put in some effort for once
You are so boring
Haiku # 75058, February 26, 2022 1:28 pm ET
by Bye bye
Got better lies, you?
Have you transcended their lies?
So enlighten me.
Haiku # 75057, February 26, 2022 11:46 am ET
by Your Disciple of Lies
Lies are all you have
So desperate, you believe
So they give you more
Haiku # 75056, February 26, 2022 9:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Biden's son got rich
On Ukraine energy board.
Crack cocaine. Hookers.
Haiku # 75055, February 25, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Take Administrators Seriously of HA HA HAHA HA HAHA
Corporate data:
Technocratic death-in-life.
Just say "NO" to beast.
Haiku # 75054, February 25, 2022 1:38 pm ET
by Revelation of Global Techno-tyranny
Corporate pastel:
Those flat clip-art office scenes...
Data-driven death.
Haiku # 75053, February 24, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by Noticer of Mass Death
Look, up in the sky!
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Someone noticing.
Haiku # 75049, February 23, 2022 1:46 pm ET
by Quack
The tide brings garbage.
From the moon the tides arise.
So we blame the moon.
Haiku # 75048, February 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by .
Frogs singing loudly.
Vibrations open gateways.
A good place to be.
Haiku # 75047, February 23, 2022 6:15 am ET
by .
There is no TP.
But do not worry, Beavis;
Just use the bidet.
Haiku # 75046, February 23, 2022 5:20 am ET
by Dish sprayer. of Clean enough to eat off of.
Cat poop's better than
Toblerone or Tootsie Rolls.
That's what's in my head.
Haiku # 75045, February 23, 2022 5:14 am ET
by Star Wars pinata.
I notice that you
assume more than you notice.
Look to other side.

With all your power,
please destroy the evil one.
And don't dis Jesus.
Haiku # 75044, February 23, 2022 4:58 am ET
by Just don't
Back to bowel movements:
Darth returns to his first love.
And we are impressed.
Haiku # 75043, February 22, 2022 11:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Excremental Health Facility
The first Tootsie Roll
wasn't shaped like Toblerone
More like cat feces
Haiku # 75042, February 22, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Worshipper of Cats
King Tut's last BM
wrapped up in toilet paper
A yummy mummie
Haiku # 75041, February 22, 2022 8:19 pm ET
by King Tuutsie of Mens Room (Pyramid)
made it to the end
and asked Jesus what he liked
"old, tired tart carts"
Haiku # 75040, February 22, 2022 7:30 pm ET
by the other apostle of he never did much
Delegitimize!
Reify ontologies!
Decentralize truth!
Haiku # 75039, February 22, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Noticer of Hermeneutic Implosion
Hey y’all I’m back now
Hotel room 117
I’m so freaking bored
Haiku # 75038, February 22, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by I’m also FREAKING OUT of Cyan
Goodbye bad haiku!
We had some good and bad times
I will miss this world
Haiku # 75037, February 22, 2022 11:43 am ET
by Cyan <3 of Here
Marxism doesn't care.
It will use you. Chew you up
And then spit you out.
Haiku # 75036, February 22, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Noticer of Dialectical Materialism
Bots cannot repent.
Jesus did not die for bots.
You are not a bot.
Haiku # 75035, February 22, 2022 9:27 am ET
by Noticer of Bots
Also on lazada, but not shopee. Soon enough i guess.
Haiku # 75034, February 22, 2022 8:53 am ET
by Beats the alternative.
My prized elixir
Purchased through the Amazon
I hate Jeff Bezos
Haiku # 75033, February 22, 2022 8:14 am ET
by Cyan of SL
Gas seeps from the swamp
not caring where it goes to
when the bubble pops.
Haiku # 75032, February 22, 2022 7:49 am ET
by Methane methods
So sick of this world.
Ppl crap on each other
like it's justified.

I'm no different
and hate myself for all the
things I've said and done.
Haiku # 75031, February 22, 2022 7:33 am ET
by End the cycle. of Sin is its own punishment.
I am getting old.
It is no longer funny.
Leave Jesus alone.
Haiku # 75030, February 22, 2022 7:25 am ET
by What did he ever do to you?
You can ask Jesus
When you see him at the end
About what he liked.
Haiku # 75029, February 22, 2022 7:14 am ET
by Noticer of Christ Jesus
Jesus liked tarot
he also liked anal play
misplaced paper cuts
Haiku # 75028, February 22, 2022 6:18 am ET
by the other apostle of esotericville
Where might one purchase
your wonderful elixir,
charming young lady?
Haiku # 75026, February 22, 2022 12:55 am ET
by Not locally available, methinks.
Chemi-castration.
More fun if by starving rats.
Or electric probes.
Haiku # 75025, February 22, 2022 12:35 am ET
by Your father of Volunteer line.
And so now I wait
With a malice I don’t want
Makes me wish I died

I want you with me
I wonder if you’d noticed
In time you might know

Though I could reset
But sadly, I don’t know how
So I wait, in pain
Haiku # 75024, February 21, 2022 11:55 pm ET
by Jvk
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