Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 57 Days and 78011 Haiku later...
nom nom shark eat man
jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws
i am bad at this
Haiku # 75023 February 21, 2022 7:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth Figpucker's Dream
Old cheese dressed in lingerie
solving equations
Haiku # 75021 February 21, 2022 6:32 pm ET
by Man Marries Old Cheese of Phillipines
I’m so very small
And he was so very tall
Butt to back to butts
Haiku # 75020 February 21, 2022 6:25 pm ET
by Cyan of Sugar Land
What? What in the butt.
Charlie bit the stinkfinger.
Now watch me neigh neigh
Haiku # 75019 February 21, 2022 5:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Horse of Horse Shoe Emporium
Old Grogan's loose goat
ate three red shirts off the line
and flagged down the train
Haiku # 75018 February 21, 2022 4:54 pm ET
by Legends of the Barn
Taco Bell Dollar
Yes. A dollar is valued.
Potatoes are what?!
Haiku # 75017 February 21, 2022 3:40 pm ET
by Cyan of Taco Bell
How hard it is to
destroy myself when I so
valiantly mend
Haiku # 75016 February 21, 2022 3:17 pm ET
by Ferg
Best haiku: 3 lines.
Super-processor unit
Embedded in verse
Haiku # 75015 February 21, 2022 12:45 pm ET
by Best Haiku Under 1000 of Mr Salesname SOMALIA
All y'all clowns so whack.
Talkin' bout yo' DREAMZ and sheet.
Gots ta keep it real.
Haiku # 75010 February 20, 2022 9:43 pm ET
by Tyrone of tha Haiku Hood Nome Sane?
Hey, Good Morning, y’all
Had another dream last night
But it had bad vibes
Haiku # 75007 February 20, 2022 8:55 am ET
by Cyan Chan Chan of SltX
Does migrating pain
indicate blood clots in arm?
Asking for my arm.
Haiku # 75006 February 20, 2022 8:37 am ET
by This is getting old... like me.
Why can't I hear/speak
as I did not long ago
To read/write's no prob.
Haiku # 75005 February 20, 2022 8:26 am ET
by Thank God for closed caption. of Getting old is for old people... oh wait.
Ducks in the old swamp
swim by the laundry ladies
dumping frothy suds.
Haiku # 75004 February 20, 2022 8:19 am ET
by bASHo of ash is the reincarnation of basho, but smells better -- has no BO
it gets frustrating
trying to make up haiku
sans inspiration
Haiku # 75003 February 20, 2022 6:25 am ET
by ash
Enough for one day.
All these voices need some rest.
My brain is leaking.
Haiku # 75002 February 19, 2022 11:25 pm ET
by My cerebral conjoined twin farted on my medula oblongata (sp?)
It's quite a sad thing.
I've only seen Limburger
like twice in my life.
Haiku # 75001 February 19, 2022 11:21 pm ET
by Only bought it once. of Like overripe brie. Not bad, but not my thing.
Are you a Brony?
I picture a Brony troll.
MLP Fleshlight.
Haiku # 75000 February 19, 2022 11:17 pm ET
by 4 D batteries.
I'd like to see hair
With Limburger cheese on it:
Hairy cheesy mess.
Haiku # 74999 February 19, 2022 11:16 pm ET
by Noticer of Hirsute Limburger
I'd like to see Hair
as an all nude opera
sung in Italian.
Haiku # 74998 February 19, 2022 11:08 pm ET
by Home for the buzzin bees.
I am NOT Cyan!
Pistachio pudding cupcakes!
And neither are we!
Haiku # 74997 February 19, 2022 11:04 pm ET
by I gots me lots o' ppls in here of but a color ain't one
Me and my lit pipe:
We're letting the world stay fucked...
I'm not smoking crack.
Haiku # 74996 February 19, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Noticer of Smoke-rings
If I hear one more
thing about NFT's, I'll
soon be in the news.
Haiku # 74995 February 19, 2022 10:59 pm ET
by they aren't pets but they are peeves.
It's schizo-babble
Most of what is written here
By you, Darth, Cyan
Haiku # 74994 February 19, 2022 10:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Names
J.C. Superstar:
Watched a Spanish production.
Fue fantastico.
Haiku # 74993 February 19, 2022 10:55 pm ET
by Noticer of Superestrellas
Nah, join the army.
You'll get paid to blow stuff up.
What more could you want?
Haiku # 74992 February 19, 2022 10:50 pm ET
by Be 92.7% of what you can be. of Or something.
I got 14 though
It’s a sign to slip away
Or just run away
Haiku # 74991 February 19, 2022 10:22 pm ET
by Cyan-Chan of Sl
Below is a link.
Fifteen sociopath traits.
Do you meet all these?

Who doesn't have some?
Don't beat yourself up too bad.
No one is normal.


https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/signs-sociopath
Haiku # 74990 February 19, 2022 7:33 pm ET
by Momma always said life is like a box of haiku.
But myself is bad
I am a sociopath
I’m all lies, lies, lies
Haiku # 74988 February 19, 2022 6:05 pm ET
by Cyan of Sugar Land
Why not be yourself.
That would be a pleasant change.
A sincere poet.

I mean, you know, other than vhs and ash.
Haiku # 74987 February 19, 2022 5:39 pm ET
by Who woulda thunk possible.
I won’t burden you
I’m not serious, okay.
I wish I was me
Haiku # 74986 February 19, 2022 4:43 pm ET
by Cyan aka me of Here
Carbon Monoxide?
I still live with my parents
So it would be hard
Haiku # 74984 February 19, 2022 3:02 pm ET
by Cyan- of Werking girl
Carbon monoxide
would be a lot less painful,
but still don't do it.

Why would you bother?
Your crimes/guilt are miniscule.
I mean, you're not me!

And even I am not the evil one.
Haiku # 74983 February 19, 2022 2:52 pm ET
by Well... not yet.
Sodium nitrite
Effective after starving
To attack blood cells
Haiku # 74982 February 19, 2022 2:32 pm ET
by CyAn of Here @ work
Talking suicide??
But why forty eight hours?
Something happens then?
Haiku # 74981 February 19, 2022 2:26 pm ET
by Don't do it.
I spoke about this
The magical potion is….
Sodium Nitrite
Haiku # 74980 February 19, 2022 1:24 pm ET
by Cyan—hehehe of SlTc
In the ancient past
you'll find what you're looking for.
Do NOT release it.
Haiku # 74979 February 19, 2022 1:04 pm ET
by There will be war.
What is your potion?
Mai Tai or Margarita?
Not keto milkshake!
Haiku # 74978 February 19, 2022 11:49 am ET
by I pray.
Mudballs thrown at cars
by horrid little children
splat on windshields.
Haiku # 74977 February 19, 2022 10:10 am ET
by Praunks
No eating right now
Waiting forty-eight hours
Then I take “potion”
Haiku # 74976 February 19, 2022 10:09 am ET
by Cyan Cheyenne Whateva of Here there and Everywhere
Hemming hemorrhoids.
Now that's talented crochet!
Horror movie scarf.
Haiku # 74975 February 19, 2022 3:16 am ET
by Warm worm.
The rear view mirror
Get to know your own hemorrhoids
and ass foliage
Haiku # 74973 February 19, 2022 2:38 am ET
by Moonlight of Vermont
Tooth of the gar fish
Fashioned into a necklace
Wear only that, please
Haiku # 74972 February 19, 2022 2:34 am ET
by Meetup of Airport (Phillipines)
Please put your Lubed Corn
in the hole of my bottom;
I will be you box.
Haiku # 74971 February 19, 2022 2:33 am ET
by Nothing like a box of fresh hot cop porn.
U go lick a gar.
Choreographed dancing poo.
And this lifts you up?
Haiku # 74970 February 19, 2022 1:48 am ET
by Lies, all lies, a lifetime of lies. How does it feel to not be real?
A topping for popcorn
Free box with hole in bottom
with Lubed Corn purchase
Haiku # 74969 February 19, 2022 1:30 am ET
by Value of Darth's Earwax (It's garlicky!)
Dig out my ear wax.
Tell me how much you love it.
Oh, my socks don't match?
Haiku # 74967 February 18, 2022 8:35 pm ET
by Gross! of The socks, not the ear wax.
Have you never tried
Pop Rocks in a netti pot
whilst on LSD?
Haiku # 74966 February 18, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Do it!
I am going to cry.
Please be a little less... dull.
Also obvious.
Haiku # 74965 February 18, 2022 8:20 pm ET
by Exploding brain sanwiches of B/c sometimes fish & chips get old.
Hey! It’s me again
“Are you making fun of me”
Yes. Absolutely.
Haiku # 74964 February 18, 2022 6:56 pm ET
by Cyan who has run a poet off the sight because of my stupidity. I’ll make a choice alright.
Cyan, do the right thing.
Think of all those around you.
And we poets too.
Haiku # 74963 February 18, 2022 6:11 pm ET
by And don't forget ice cream.
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