Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 38 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

The rear view mirror
Get to know your own hemorrhoids
and ass foliage
Haiku # 74973, February 19, 2022 2:38 am ET
by Moonlight of Vermont
Tooth of the gar fish
Fashioned into a necklace
Wear only that, please
Haiku # 74972, February 19, 2022 2:34 am ET
by Meetup of Airport (Phillipines)
Please put your Lubed Corn
in the hole of my bottom;
I will be you box.
Haiku # 74971, February 19, 2022 2:33 am ET
by Nothing like a box of fresh hot cop porn.
U go lick a gar.
Choreographed dancing poo.
And this lifts you up?
Haiku # 74970, February 19, 2022 1:48 am ET
by Lies, all lies, a lifetime of lies. How does it feel to not be real?
A topping for popcorn
Free box with hole in bottom
with Lubed Corn purchase
Haiku # 74969, February 19, 2022 1:30 am ET
by Value of Darth's Earwax (It's garlicky!)
Dig out my ear wax.
Tell me how much you love it.
Oh, my socks don't match?
Haiku # 74967, February 18, 2022 8:35 pm ET
by Gross! of The socks, not the ear wax.
Have you never tried
Pop Rocks in a netti pot
whilst on LSD?
Haiku # 74966, February 18, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Do it!
I am going to cry.
Please be a little less... dull.
Also obvious.
Haiku # 74965, February 18, 2022 8:20 pm ET
by Exploding brain sanwiches of B/c sometimes fish & chips get old.
Hey! It’s me again
“Are you making fun of me”
Yes. Absolutely.
Haiku # 74964, February 18, 2022 6:56 pm ET
by Cyan who has run a poet off the sight because of my stupidity. I’ll make a choice alright.
Cyan, do the right thing.
Think of all those around you.
And we poets too.
Haiku # 74963, February 18, 2022 6:11 pm ET
by And don't forget ice cream.
Still making a choice
Blah blah blah blah Blah blah-blah
I’m a silly girl
Haiku # 74962, February 18, 2022 5:12 pm ET
by Cyan who is actually SMILING THRU THE tears of Hola
What-What in the Butt.
The greatest song of our age.
Everything you need!
Haiku # 74961, February 18, 2022 2:12 pm ET
by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbGkxcY7YFU&t=15s
Subject line is: Hey
Haven’t spoken in awhile
I’d like to chat soon
Haiku # 74960, February 18, 2022 11:53 am ET
by From Cyan of Emails from Sugar Land
cowpoke change your ways!
you really shouldn't poke cows.
that's not very nice.

youtube.com/watch?v=xiqZ7x3WkyE
Haiku # 74959, February 18, 2022 8:44 am ET
by It's the cheese. of demon pressure. must rest or they burst out.
Love lady fingers.
Fourth of July picnic snacks.
At Cannibal Ranch.
Haiku # 74958, February 18, 2022 8:29 am ET
by Toasted and Roasted!
not into "roxy".
but it was worth checking out.
thanks i guess suppose.
Haiku # 74957, February 18, 2022 8:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
you forgot "septic"
i happen to have noticed
fingers? who needs them!
Haiku # 74956, February 18, 2022 8:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Nothing screams hot stuff
Like overweight cannibals
Burning their fingers
Haiku # 74954, February 18, 2022 6:24 am ET
by Ouch Darn Warm of Tart
You cannot improve
if you're already perfect.
Talkin' 'bout Cyan.
Haiku # 74953, February 18, 2022 5:15 am ET
by Bald girls are hot!
I think you can buy
DYI lobotomy
kits on Amazon.
Haiku # 74952, February 18, 2022 4:55 am ET
by Or used on ebay.
My envy for you
So makes me want to hate you
I am so shattered

Lobotomize me
I barely joke anymore
Catatonic joy
Haiku # 74950, February 18, 2022 12:50 am ET
by f2m
Butt butt in the WHAT?
I'm talking about music.
Get your head out your
Haiku # 74947, February 17, 2022 11:12 pm ET
by Assessing the Assets of 70s Glam-rock.
I was here for Seth
Took pictures to remember
But I’ll still forget
Haiku # 74946, February 17, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Cyan who can’t think of anything to better her life
I'll check out roxy.
Later though, not right this sec.
My music is weird.
Haiku # 74945, February 17, 2022 9:25 pm ET
by I phink you freaky. of What-what in the butt. Etc.
This might sound kinky.
I want to be crucified.
Upside down and nude.
Haiku # 74944, February 17, 2022 9:20 pm ET
by Things might get messy.
Hey Darth, I wonder:
do you like Roxy Music?
They were a great band.
Haiku # 74943, February 17, 2022 9:19 pm ET
by Bryan Ferry Was/Is a Master of R + R
A movie pirate
pirating pirate movies.
Expensive key lime.
Haiku # 74942, February 17, 2022 9:16 pm ET
by Pie rates are going up.
I think we should meet.
You kill me then I'll kill you.
Wait, that might not work.

Cannibalism?
Make a tasty roast of me.
Sell the sandwiches.
Haiku # 74941, February 17, 2022 9:13 pm ET
by Logistic difficulties.
I’m waiting for it
Perfect opportunity
Slip away and die
Haiku # 74940, February 17, 2022 9:00 pm ET
by It’s fucking me again of You know where (Cyan Land)
Membranous balloon
nasal cavity exit
spiritgasm blast.
Haiku # 74939, February 17, 2022 6:05 pm ET
by Ouchy
There was a strange clown.
Jugular the Juggler.
On his unibike.
Haiku # 74938, February 17, 2022 5:58 pm ET
by Juggalo Family of Shotgun this 500cc 'TussinDM.
Where are all the birds?
They are waiting for the worms.
For the worms to come.
Haiku # 74937, February 17, 2022 5:38 pm ET
by sic(k) of Birdfeeder
I am still at work
My manager made me boss
While he is sick
Haiku # 74935, February 17, 2022 12:35 pm ET
by Cyan the Jefe of The Team
Changing the subject
implies involvement and guilt,
murder and stealing
Haiku # 74934, February 17, 2022 10:27 am ET
by Beady eyes and flapping heads
Hockey Canada
It’s truly phenomenal
Buddhist and Catholic
Haiku # 74933, February 17, 2022 8:57 am ET
by Cyan like actually of I’m bad headed and blah blah Sleitchen
That Justin Trudeau!
Such a sly stylish fellow.
I sure love that boy.
Haiku # 74932, February 17, 2022 6:42 am ET
by Maple Leaf Rag of Scott Joplin
Brown's a good color
to identify with if
you're a piece of shit.

When 900 years old you've reached, look as good you will not, hmm?

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Haiku # 74931, February 17, 2022 3:55 am ET
by Brown
An apartment is
something you would want to die
for? That's just insane!
Haiku # 74930, February 17, 2022 3:23 am ET
by Even with a bad brain, things don't add up. of We should all be colors. I will be brown, for obvious reasons.
So, sk, it seems there
is doom & gloom around the
corner. Is it true?
Haiku # 74929, February 17, 2022 3:16 am ET
by Digging has paid off.
I finally ate
I haven’t eaten all day
Time to go night night
Haiku # 74927, February 16, 2022 7:18 pm ET
by Cyan who is talking of going to actual sleep
Here, have some nachos.
All organic plantain chips
drenched with limburger.
Haiku # 74926, February 16, 2022 5:38 pm ET
by Damn hippies, get off my lawn!
On that day in March
The apartment goes back up
And be rented out
Haiku # 74925, February 16, 2022 5:08 pm ET
by Cyan of Not my apartment tho
Those are beautiful
answers, my friends. I mean that.
Thanks for that laughter.

It's much needed as old age settles in like that first hard frost, killing all the life above ground. But I think this time it... words are not coming to me... Let's just say it's getting dark in the old egg noggin. No worries though.

I just wish I could reverse time and undo a LOT of things. Life. Well, I guess my evils are just little ones compared to shit I see in news these days. But still...

I really needed that laughter, so thanks. Coffee, mint chocolate chip, anything with berries. Egg nog, but that's only seasonal... and hard to find!

But still, what's on the 22nd? If you don't mind.
Big changes in my life also... Strange parallels.

One thing I realize a bit late... To be a good person doesn't really mean you have to actively be good... It's more about just not being a dick to ppl. And I have been, many times.
Haiku # 74924, February 16, 2022 4:54 pm ET
by Come on back vhs and ash! We need more grumpy old men on here. LOL.
I take my ice cream
Festooned with cigarette butts
For the fire and ice
Haiku # 74923, February 16, 2022 4:34 pm ET
by It reminds me of your love
I have missed you, Darth
You helped me through a dark time
Step into the light
Haiku # 74922, February 16, 2022 4:32 pm ET
by Starkitten of Sincerity
My favorite ice cream
Chocolate with chocolate chips
Inside of a cone
Haiku # 74921, February 16, 2022 4:31 pm ET
by Cyan — for real of SlTX
Noticer is she
Also known as Starkitten
Purrcific Northwest
Haiku # 74920, February 16, 2022 4:29 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Muscle Milk talking?
I choose Darth Figpucker's wrath
You gonna throw cheese?
Haiku # 74919, February 16, 2022 4:27 pm ET
by Cheddar of Incoming!!
Darth's favorite ice cream
The kind a little kid drops
on the cruel sidewalk
Haiku # 74918, February 16, 2022 4:24 pm ET
by Jerker of Tears
What about ice cream?
What's your favorite brand/flavor?
Noticer knows mine.
Haiku # 74917, February 16, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by He knows everything about me.
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