Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 156 Days and 77035 Haiku later...

Put in your two cents
You will receive one haiku
and two freeze dried farts
Haiku # 75075, March 3, 2022 11:42 pm ET
by Deal of The Day
Put in then put out.
Put up or shut up. Haiku:
What we want from you.
Haiku # 75073, March 3, 2022 8:25 pm ET
by Volodimir of Vladimir
if you're feeling red
and you want your neighbours dead
putin on the blitz
Haiku # 75072, March 3, 2022 6:20 am ET
by ash of get back in the ussr
The moon is old cheese
From the moon, the cheese tides swell
Blame Darth for the smell
Haiku # 75069, March 2, 2022 2:30 am ET
by Songs of The Fig Pluckers
Faint tinkling of tune...
You will piss like a monsoon
The ladies will swoon
Haiku # 75068, March 2, 2022 12:30 am ET
by Noticer of Biology
You in the cocoon
Dangling all aglow with moon
When do you bust out?
Haiku # 75067, March 1, 2022 10:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
I crane, you crane, we
all crane for Ukraine. Put in
a bit more effort.
Haiku # 75066, March 1, 2022 7:10 am ET
by Kenneth Affok of Россия
The Beak of the Week
Do any birds have big dinks?
Flightless ones, perhaps
Haiku # 75065, March 1, 2022 1:21 am ET
by 65th 75th ex of Manmoth, New Jersey
The world will be gone
before the chrysalis pops.
Better to be dead.
Haiku # 75064, February 28, 2022 2:07 am ET
by SLOTHMAN
I awoke once more
With that music heart feeling
Mind orchestra plays
Back Where I Belong
By Baroness (post chorus)
As I think of her
Spacetime's been weaving
An emotion tapestry
And I realize
Stunned hyperventilating:
This is my cocoon
Grown over new wings
That now grow, fill with my blood
Soon... I seek the moon
Haiku # 75063, February 28, 2022 12:00 am ET
by MANMOTH of Hanging upside down from a little branch, throbbing slightly but hopefully not enough to attract predators
Uncomfortably numb
He said that it was put in
I didn't feel it
Haiku # 75060, February 26, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by Melania Trump of USA
I am too boring
To putin any effort.
So I invade you.
Haiku # 75059, February 26, 2022 2:30 pm ET
by Noticer of Vladimir's Mother
Enlighten yourself
Put in some effort for once
You are so boring
Haiku # 75058, February 26, 2022 1:28 pm ET
by Bye bye
Got better lies, you?
Have you transcended their lies?
So enlighten me.
Haiku # 75057, February 26, 2022 11:46 am ET
by Your Disciple of Lies
Lies are all you have
So desperate, you believe
So they give you more
Haiku # 75056, February 26, 2022 9:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Biden's son got rich
On Ukraine energy board.
Crack cocaine. Hookers.
Haiku # 75055, February 25, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Take Administrators Seriously of HA HA HAHA HA HAHA
Corporate data:
Technocratic death-in-life.
Just say "NO" to beast.
Haiku # 75054, February 25, 2022 1:38 pm ET
by Revelation of Global Techno-tyranny
Corporate pastel:
Those flat clip-art office scenes...
Data-driven death.
Haiku # 75053, February 24, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by Noticer of Mass Death
Look, up in the sky!
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Someone noticing.
Haiku # 75049, February 23, 2022 1:46 pm ET
by Quack
The tide brings garbage.
From the moon the tides arise.
So we blame the moon.
Haiku # 75048, February 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by .
Frogs singing loudly.
Vibrations open gateways.
A good place to be.
Haiku # 75047, February 23, 2022 6:15 am ET
by .
There is no TP.
But do not worry, Beavis;
Just use the bidet.
Haiku # 75046, February 23, 2022 5:20 am ET
by Dish sprayer. of Clean enough to eat off of.
Cat poop's better than
Toblerone or Tootsie Rolls.
That's what's in my head.
Haiku # 75045, February 23, 2022 5:14 am ET
by Star Wars pinata.
I notice that you
assume more than you notice.
Look to other side.

With all your power,
please destroy the evil one.
And don't dis Jesus.
Haiku # 75044, February 23, 2022 4:58 am ET
by Just don't
Back to bowel movements:
Darth returns to his first love.
And we are impressed.
Haiku # 75043, February 22, 2022 11:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Excremental Health Facility
The first Tootsie Roll
wasn't shaped like Toblerone
More like cat feces
Haiku # 75042, February 22, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Worshipper of Cats
King Tut's last BM
wrapped up in toilet paper
A yummy mummie
Haiku # 75041, February 22, 2022 8:19 pm ET
by King Tuutsie of Mens Room (Pyramid)
made it to the end
and asked Jesus what he liked
"old, tired tart carts"
Haiku # 75040, February 22, 2022 7:30 pm ET
by the other apostle of he never did much
Delegitimize!
Reify ontologies!
Decentralize truth!
Haiku # 75039, February 22, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Noticer of Hermeneutic Implosion
Hey y’all I’m back now
Hotel room 117
I’m so freaking bored
Haiku # 75038, February 22, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by I’m also FREAKING OUT of Cyan
Goodbye bad haiku!
We had some good and bad times
I will miss this world
Haiku # 75037, February 22, 2022 11:43 am ET
by Cyan <3 of Here
Marxism doesn't care.
It will use you. Chew you up
And then spit you out.
Haiku # 75036, February 22, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Noticer of Dialectical Materialism
Bots cannot repent.
Jesus did not die for bots.
You are not a bot.
Haiku # 75035, February 22, 2022 9:27 am ET
by Noticer of Bots
Also on lazada, but not shopee. Soon enough i guess.
Haiku # 75034, February 22, 2022 8:53 am ET
by Beats the alternative.
My prized elixir
Purchased through the Amazon
I hate Jeff Bezos
Haiku # 75033, February 22, 2022 8:14 am ET
by Cyan of SL
Gas seeps from the swamp
not caring where it goes to
when the bubble pops.
Haiku # 75032, February 22, 2022 7:49 am ET
by Methane methods
So sick of this world.
Ppl crap on each other
like it's justified.

I'm no different
and hate myself for all the
things I've said and done.
Haiku # 75031, February 22, 2022 7:33 am ET
by End the cycle. of Sin is its own punishment.
I am getting old.
It is no longer funny.
Leave Jesus alone.
Haiku # 75030, February 22, 2022 7:25 am ET
by What did he ever do to you?
You can ask Jesus
When you see him at the end
About what he liked.
Haiku # 75029, February 22, 2022 7:14 am ET
by Noticer of Christ Jesus
Jesus liked tarot
he also liked anal play
misplaced paper cuts
Haiku # 75028, February 22, 2022 6:18 am ET
by the other apostle of esotericville
Where might one purchase
your wonderful elixir,
charming young lady?
Haiku # 75026, February 22, 2022 12:55 am ET
by Not locally available, methinks.
Chemi-castration.
More fun if by starving rats.
Or electric probes.
Haiku # 75025, February 22, 2022 12:35 am ET
by Your father of Volunteer line.
And so now I wait
With a malice I don’t want
Makes me wish I died

I want you with me
I wonder if you’d noticed
In time you might know

Though I could reset
But sadly, I don’t know how
So I wait, in pain
Haiku # 75024, February 21, 2022 11:55 pm ET
by Jvk
nom nom shark eat man
jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws
i am bad at this
Haiku # 75023, February 21, 2022 7:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth Figpucker's Dream
Old cheese dressed in lingerie
solving equations
Haiku # 75021, February 21, 2022 6:32 pm ET
by Man Marries Old Cheese of Phillipines
I’m so very small
And he was so very tall
Butt to back to butts
Haiku # 75020, February 21, 2022 6:25 pm ET
by Cyan of Sugar Land
What? What in the butt.
Charlie bit the stinkfinger.
Now watch me neigh neigh
Haiku # 75019, February 21, 2022 5:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Horse of Horse Shoe Emporium
Old Grogan's loose goat
ate three red shirts off the line
and flagged down the train
Haiku # 75018, February 21, 2022 4:54 pm ET
by Legends of the Barn
Taco Bell Dollar
Yes. A dollar is valued.
Potatoes are what?!
Haiku # 75017, February 21, 2022 3:40 pm ET
by Cyan of Taco Bell
How hard it is to
destroy myself when I so
valiantly mend
Haiku # 75016, February 21, 2022 3:17 pm ET
by Ferg
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